USA-Mexico Futbol

Scipio posting about soccer. I better go buy a lottery ticket or something.

We’ll be taking over Cuatro’s on 24th & San Gabriel to douse ourselves in beer and pork tacos. The US has never won at Aztec and Mexico is fighting for a World Cup berth. They are in 4th place, US is in 2nd and the top 3 advance.

I’ll be watching because evidently we’ll be playing our A teamers. Plus, I have a vested interest in the US winning. A Mexico win almost ensures the fact that half of my landscaping crew calls in sick on Thursday.

My favorite USA-Mexico moment has to be the second time I saw them play in person, at the Cotton Bowl about 5 years ago. I went as a birthday present and had the pleasure of sitting in front of an incredibly drunk German who remarked Connor Casey had no business on the pitch as he was “as slow as a donkey”.

During stoppage time (about the 92nd minute if i remember correctly), there is a penalty outside the Mexican box, and on the free kick a cross is whipped in by Taylor Twellman and Eddie Pope crushes it into the back of the net. The 80% Mexican crowd goes uncharacteristically silent until I see Uncle Sam’s Army (the US Cheering Section) get smoked out with Red, White, and Green smoke bombs. A frito pie goes flying over my head (shortly followed by an old sneaker) and hits someone a few rows in front of me. I get pelted by ice, and leave grinning and jeering U-S-A to anyone willing to hear. Not nearly the game the 2007 gold cup final or 2002 world cup round of 16 games were, but spectacular none the less.

I moved to San Francisco shortly before a World Cup year. For a solid week or so I’m heading into work at 4 AM or so (market hours) and see the bars in North Beach packed, with people spilling out onto the sidewalks. Took me at least a couple of days to figure out what was going on.

Having gotten up in the middle of the night in various parts of the world to watch a Texas game, I get the passion. The rules though, not so much.

Are we pouring concrete today?

One of my favorite jokes.

Soccer is a lot of fun to play, a lot more fun than baseball IMO. I played a few games in Mexico as a kid, with some talented teams (and some not), and got may ass kicked each time. We actually won one game, but I was nearly sodomized and otherwise violated during a corner kick.

Anyway, they love the shit out of that sport over there, but they also love baseball.

…and bull fighting.

Of the three, as a spectator sport, you have to go with bull fighting IMO.

More importantly the EPL begins this weekend. If you want to see the best futbol in the world, that’s where you need to turn. Well, at least until Real Madrid and Barca tee it up.

Red Devils four-peat holla!

I attended a US v. Mexico soccer game at Aztec Stadium in 2000. I’m not a huge soccer fan, just happened to be in Mexico City. Each section had a bartender who’d serve you beer as fast as you could drink it. In glasses. And there’s no such thing as “no smoking” in Mexico, whatever your smoking preferences. Yessir, they treat you like an adult down there.

Only on this site would I find myself opening a post titled “USA-Mexico Futbol”.

It’s a cool sport, but it’s hard to truly invest in it when it’s America’s 4/5th favorite sport (hockey is the other contender) at an amatuer level. We all play it through 6-8th grade then drop it. America will never really get into it because our best atheletes don’t play it, especially the Black community, so we never excell at the international level.

How can you compete against Brazil when white upper middle class kids are you singular talent base?

Here’s an interesting puff piece about the Mexican coach’s love of the Cowboys and Staubach.

The toughest part of that stadium is the altitude and the heat – which is part of the reason no US team has ever won there.

From the US coach:

“You’re not playing on a level playing field in that game,” Arena said. "On a level playing field at sea level, I would favor the United States.

“The conditions at Azteca are difficult. You have around 100,000 people. The stadium is massive. The sightlines are real difficult for players. There are literally probably 20 yards from the touchline to the dugouts. You see that and the field looks like you’re out in the country.

“Then you start dealing with the heat and the altitude and it gets to your head. Not only your head. The physiology is difficult. I remember games where we had oxygen at halftime. It’s hard. It’s an awesome home-field advantage.”

Will Tatu be suiting up for Mexico?

Tatu is 1)Dead and 2)was French, so no he’s not suiting up for my beloved Tri.

Pouring concrete? That’s supposed to be funny?

Well at least it’s not as funny as what I saw yesterday, 12 of my countrymen packed into the back of a pickup.

México should win today, though anything can happen. See the 5-0 spanking, El Tri gave the Norteamericanos last month at Giants Stadium.

I suspect that the existence of this post will be in Sports Illustrated next week under “Signs of the Apocalypse”

Laz,

Against our C squad. Congrats.

And yes, Mexicans are best at pouring concrete. Nobody comes close. It’s a complement.

Mexico should win today.

Profundity reigns.

Bates,

The MLS is still hanging on ten years later and actually expanding. The new Seattle franchise sells out every game averaging 30K in attendance because they finally figured out how to market the sport.

Part of the reason is the success of the Nike developmental academies (a $100 million investment ten years ago) which has helped parlay casual interest from top athletes in 6th-12th grade into professional soccer careers.

Ten years ago we had one or two guys playing on top flight European rosters, now half of our starting lineup plays overseas for quality teams. Ironically, the key to our progress has been to send our best MLS players overseas to gain experience against world class competition. That will never change. The MLS is where fading Euro stars come to wind down their careers and promising collegiate players hope they get noticed by teams abroad. I might watch three games a year.

Guys like Jozy Altidore that might have been lured towards a more lucrative sport are now sticking with it and the result is a higher level of play, as evidence by the win over Spain (and nearly Brazil) in the Confederations Cup.

Cazadores changed his handle in recognition of the changing tide of sports in Texas and the U.S. of A. I may change mine to “Soccormayor” if the U.S. wins the match versus Mexico AND Texas loses to L.A. Monroe.

Soccer is a lot of fun to play, a lot more fun than baseball IMO.

Agreed. I endured the pain of growing up in a family of baseball fans, and so I spent most of my youthful sporting energy lazily standing on a dirt diamond, chewing on my glove stitching and waiting for something – ANYTHING – to happen. Given the choice, I would choose to play soccer over baseball/softball 9 times out of 10.

I love how Cazadores went from $18 a bottle to $37 in about six months once Specs started selling it.

BC should invest its swelling profits into a distillery.

I’ll start paying attention when these supposed “big games” are on an English-language station, thank you.

Vasherized,
Sure, it was a ‘C’ squad but it’s not like México had it’s ‘A’ team there either. Also, ’C’squad or not, allowing 5 scores in one half is certainly not good.

Granted, a stadium full of people calling the U.S. goalie P*to every time he kicked off, might have been a factor. Howard is going to hear it even louder today, but I’m sure he tunes it out.

Profound or not, it is what it is Vasherized. México is favored due to awesome home-field advantage an environment like Azteca provides. Then again anything can happen, that’s why they play the game.

Take the Confederations Cup. Spain should have not only beaten Team USA but have mopped the floor with them. Fortunately for Team USA, Spock came up with a brilliant defensive game plan (which his back line executed flawlessly) and neutralized Spain’s world-class play makers.

The outcome of that match showed that well, as we all know, anything can happen.

All this being said, México is in the tough spot every favorite finds itself in. If they win, “well it was supposed to go that way”, if they lose, all hell will break loose in my native land and Aguirre might find himself out of a job.

Club Carnaval will be packed.

CC is still there?!?

If it weren’t, HJ would be unemployed.

It’s Nacogdoches, but whatever. Lame city.

Good write up. Azteca is a major shithole.

Vash-

There’s been progress, but we have a long way to go. I usually catch at least 2 United games every year and have a ball (one in the beer throwing Central American section, and one in the hipster section). Hands down one of the better live sports (a trait it shares with hockey [which may or may not be ironic]).

But to haul out a horry old chestnut, we’d dominate if we could get the Allen Iverson’s and Darrell Green’s of the world to play soccer instead of basketball or football. Until then, or when our latin immigrant population get’s big enough, we will remain competitive, but not dominate.

“I usually catch at least 2 United games every year and have a ball (one in the beer throwing Central American section, and one in the hipster section).”

I don’t even know you anymore.

Dude, Four years in New England will do that to you.

My HS Baseball Coach:

“Men, not one varsity sport this year has made the playoffs – there is no reason why we shouldn’t be the first this year.”

“Say, Coach, actually Girl’s Soccer just made it to Regionals…”

“Girls doesn’t count. And Soccer’s a Communist Sport.”

From USMNT twitter feed. Nice.

Roads are packed with fans giving us thumbs down and five-zero… the bus just got hit with a rock we get onto the highway #USMNT

Communist or not, have you SEEN the tail soccer players pull:

This is just one of Renaldo’s girlfriends:

Gemma Atkinson.

Ronaldo is a fucking puff though…universally despised. Greasy bastard.

Maybe. But he’s tapping hotter ass than you.

I spent a week in Mexico City once. The air is unbelievably bad because of the pollution of 25 million people in one third world city surrounded by mountains. The air is also very thin because of the altitude. The air quality alone is good for a 1 or 2 goal edge for the home team.

Roads are packed with fans giving us thumbs down and five-zero… the bus just got hit with a rock we get onto the highway #USMNT

Same shit happened to us in high school when we played Crystal City.

I have a lot of respect for soccer players. It takes an incredible athlete to excel in the sport, however, as a spectator it doesn’t do it for me.

Soccer is to football the way checkers is to chess.

GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLL USA

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL

That Blanco guy looks like Herbert Lom.

This is like watching a couple of blind dudes play foosball.

1-1.
 
This is an action packed scoring explosion!

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Landon Donovan strikes me as a pussy.

‘are you aligned with football’

i reread this several times in my hank azaria ‘you are for the scuba?’ voice and amused myself immensely, then stole your concrete joke for my mexican colleague, then my mexican colleague laughed at HJ’s foosball joke, until i explained more about HJ, then the whole clinic got kind of quiet.

so we’re following along, sorta, with what is probably the only longhorn soccer blog ever.

Dos observaciones:

(1) Is futbol the only sport in which the clock ascends instead of descends? If so, is that because of injury/stoppage time? That’s my guess, but I still don’t see why the time couldn’t be added to “00:00” instead of “45:00”. Stupid.

(2) Can we start a collection to pay for ESPN to donate one of their old, leftover banners from circa-1989 that displays both the score AND the time simultaneously?!? Cutting edge, I know, but this either/or b.s. is pathetic.

Landon is indeed a pussy.

Just lost our signal from a fucking tsunami that swept through austin. Limbs down everywhere. We got more rain in the last ten minutes than we have all year.

Like clockwork with spring practice. You can schedule it

Scip, your evaluation is pretty accurate.

1-1 at the half.

Mexicanos al grito de guerra!

The field is mowed in the same pattern as a cement mixer’s sideburns.

Mexico is pretty much controlling the game which probably renders it unwatchable for the casual fan.

Mexico is the dirtiest club in international soccer. They also suck at being a country.

This is probably a good time to go to Home Depot, no?

need some caulk?

Why is Team Mexico so consistently dirty? I remember that being a characteristic for at least the last ten years. Or is that something just emerges when they see gringos?

Wow. USA loses all aggression content to tie and the predictable result ensues.
 
2-1 Mexico

Reading your scoring updates is just like being there.

The only thing missing is chiclets.

After this who’s buying first round at the donkey show?

there’s never a second round.

Canel’s, holla.

2-1

El Tri wins!

Trips,

Very enlightened of you

It was a noble victory. El Tri should be proud of the style with which they won. They should also be proud of NAFTA and Zetas.

No clue what happened here. I feel like Prince Akeem at the basketball game. Or eechese at a college football game.

In dee face, in dee face!!!

I am ashamed of this site, and every one of the eunuchs that posted on this thread. Scipio should be taken outside, forced to wear a meat helmet, wrapped in a burlap sack and beaten with reeds. I am less of an American from having read this thread.

I have legally changed my name to Renaldo Ocho Cinco. I am hoping Gemma Atkinson shows up on my door step OMG.

CTJ missed the cut on his 6th grade soccer team and never recovered.

Typical game at Azteca. More choking incidents than goals scored.

I like to show a little flair when I blow. Just ask Donovan. WHEEEEE!!!

What a great thread, absofuckinlutely hilarious.

Look for a spike in swine flu cases and crab outbreaks at a soccer field near you. 0-23-1 now versus Mexico in futbol. Brings back memories of Rice’s record against us in football until the Mackovic era………

Meh, let them have their sports victory while their entire country lapses into civil war.

Donovan now has swine flu just as predicted. Wonder where the crabs are?