Give Us Vengeance

by Barking Carnival Staff on Oct 16, 2009 2:47 PM CDT in Texas Longhorns and Other Football

Give Us Vengeance, Oh God, and/or Mack Brown. We have waited with patience for this day.

If you’re not thinking the same thing going into this weekend, you are rooting for a different team.

This team went out and took up the mantle from OU on the field last year. No one thought they would and they did. They did it fighting uphill and they didn’t stop until they had wrenched it from Sam Bradford’s dead, cold, vanquished hands. Bob Stoops’ 1000 yard, mandibly-challenged stare during the closing moments of the nationally televised game told the entire story.

Or so we thought.

It didn’t take long after that before we started hearing the hate and the doubt from the cheating buffoons north of our illustrious border. The whining started with nitpicks being tossed out their in regard to Ryan Reynolds going down. Demarco Murray had a pulled-labia. Bit by little bit, Stoops, the Blowkie fans, and then the media began to cast doubts about the validity of that victory. All along, we said nothing as a fanbase and program. Nevermind Irby being out. The game being played on a neutral field. We said little.

Then we lost in the literal last second on the road at Tech on a historic play. Then it was like the OU game was never played. Then we watched OU grab their collective crotch, point and laugh through their one remaining dirty, bucked-tooth as they were handed a gift to play for it all because they ran up the scores on the also-rans. Not only were scores run up, but they were lauded for it during the broadcasts by Herbstreit and Musberger. They were rewarded for it in the polls by the other coaches. We watched the Stoops Coaching Tree vote in unison for OU to go to the title game. Knowing all along that were they in the spot of Texas, the same coaches would be shrieking louder than any decibel-level Brown could attempt to muster.

"He who is moral can be shamed." – Sun Tzu

Then when we were handed a giant shit sandwich to chew down beyond just having to sit and watch OU shit themselves in yet another title game. Jamarcus McFarland’s mother ca$he$ in and sends her son across the border in conjunction with an article of lies in the New York Times by a Sooner sycophant posing as a journalist in Thayer Evans. The thrust of the story was the debauchery from the Texas fanbase during OU weekend. To top it off, the woman all but calls Mack Brown a liar and Bob Stoops a saint.

OU fan cackles in glee to this day because they got over on us last year. We had scoreboard, but they got to sit at the final table by stealing our chips.

Give us vengeance. Punish them for putting their injured players at risk. Punish them for being the sorry bastards that they are. Put the gun to that program’s 2009 forehead, pull the trigger, and send them straight down into the depths of college football hell where they deserve to rot for the remainder of this season.

Give us vengeance. Give us a win.

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Comments

Crom, I have never prayed to you before. I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That’s what’s important! Valor pleases you, Crom… so grant me one request. Grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you!

by HenryJames on Oct 16, 2009 2:55 PM CDT reply actions

A second Conan reference in a week or so…not bad!

by uthookem on Oct 16, 2009 3:15 PM CDT reply actions

Is there anything better than waching those slack-jawed, dumbass, cock-licking, sister-fucking, red-assed, dirt-stealing baboons slink out of the Cotton Bowl halfway through the third quarter of a Texas blow out? Seeing that seething inbred army dissolve, doubly depressed because not only did they just lose to the University of By God Texas, but now they have to trudge their stank asses back to that shithole they call a state?

May God in all of His wisdom and mercy let it be so on Saturday.

It’s 3:19 and ou sucks ugly, hairy balls.

by Flamingmonkeyass on Oct 16, 2009 3:15 PM CDT reply actions

I’m afraid a win is not enough. I want a Hollywood style fight scene where OU is Bruce Willis. These are always unimaginably brutal scenes, but easy to watch because you know the good guy, Bruce Willis, will somehow gather his beaten, tattered and bloody self together to overcome the bad guy. Not this time. This time, with Bruce in a pool of blood and parts of teeth, I want Texas, the villain, to casually step on his fucking throat and dispatch his sorry ass. Fin.

by Magnificent Bastard on Oct 16, 2009 3:19 PM CDT reply actions

I want to “see the enemy driven before us” and “hear the lamentations of the women.”

The abundance of posts is reminding me of the finale of a 4th of July fireworks show. Keep’m coming.

by magnusbleuveigner on Oct 16, 2009 4:05 PM CDT reply actions

Dear CTJ,

Amen.

Regards,
HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE

by Pass the Bourbon on Oct 16, 2009 4:17 PM CDT reply actions

Greg Davis keeps it close in the first half. PB&J’s, Jordan the Barbarian, Fozzy (yes… I said it), and a defensive score are the 2nd half difference makers.

31-17 Horns.

by Art Vandelay on Oct 16, 2009 4:25 PM CDT reply actions

"Revenge is an act of passion; vengeance of justice. Injuries are revenged; crimes are avenged." Samuel Johnson

by Scipio Tex on Oct 16, 2009 4:28 PM CDT reply actions

"If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared"

- Machiavelli

by Scipio Tex on Oct 16, 2009 4:29 PM CDT reply actions

Just looking at the rosters of each team. Future NFL players abound on the defenses, not too many on the offenses. This game could be ugly.

by magnusbleuveigner on Oct 16, 2009 4:33 PM CDT reply actions

by Scipio Tex on Oct 16, 2009 4:34 PM CDT reply actions

Come get you some, you sorry fucks.

by Trips Right on Oct 16, 2009 4:40 PM CDT reply actions

“Revenge is a dish best served cold. It is very cold…. (big pause) … IN SPACE!” -Khan

by nordberg on Oct 16, 2009 4:48 PM CDT reply actions

Too obscure?

by HenryJames on Oct 16, 2009 6:46 PM CDT reply actions

Mudhole 2.0.

Well done, sir.

by hopefulhorn on Oct 16, 2009 7:30 PM CDT reply actions

I love the way you guys never let the truth stand in the way of a good rant. Especially true with ctj.

“we lost in the literal last second on the road at Tech on a historic play”. The truth, your offense did not even show in the first half, DB flat drops a gimme interception, and two other DB’s cannot even push a receiver pinned to the sideline out of bounds. That’s not historic, that’s properly called choking.

“They were rewarded for it in the polls by the other coaches. We watched the Stoops Coaching Tree vote in unison for OU to go to the title game.” Look at the standings below taken from the week prior to the Big 12 Championship. MB politicked his team ahead in the polls. Combine the human polls and you are in by the slimmest of margins, .0014. The real problem is that MB could not politick the computers. It had nothing to do with running up the scores, comparative scores, or anything else. It had everything to do with your weak OOC schedule. Texas was better than the Sooners last year. That fact cannot be disputed.

BCS Harris USA Today Computer
# % # % %

Oklahoma .9351 2569-.9094 1397-.9161 .9800
~~Bitchy Whiners~~ Absolutely amazing champions from Texas .9223 2575-.9115 1396-.9154 .9400

MB has stated on numerous occasions that by virtue of playing in the Big 12, a strong OOC schedule is not necessary. So, wimp of the week is activated. Apparently he did not consider ties within the conference or being matched against any team from another strong conference that might play a real schedule. Why did your staff need outside consultants this past summer to understand the computer formulas? Joe C did not wait a decade to understand the rules. MB makes $3 mil + a year, makes a gross error in judgment, wants to change the rules in the middle of the season despite having voted for that same rule, and then blames all his problems on OU running up the score. Fucking hilarious.

Even better, you have a very good chance to have the same result this year. Start working on your excuses now.Man, I hope my Sooners don’t quit this year, like they did last year.

Truth is generally the best vindication against slander.
A. Lincoln

by soonerspy on Oct 16, 2009 9:18 PM CDT reply actions

“I love the way you guys never let the truth stand in the way of a good rant. Especially true with ctj.

"we lost in the literal last second on the road at Tech on a historic play". The truth, your offense did not even show in the first half, DB flat drops a gimme interception, and two other DB’s cannot even push a receiver pinned to the sideline out of bounds."

Wait, what? Which part wasn’t true? 1) We lost on a last-second play. 2) The game was in Lubbock. 3) The play itself is, unfortunately, historic. Which part are you trying to argue?

by nordberg on Oct 16, 2009 9:28 PM CDT reply actions

OK, it was a historic choke we had last year. Man, we averaged over 50 points per game, and could only get 2 TDs against Florida. Little did we know that was what our output would be against BYU and Miami also.

by soonerspy on Oct 16, 2009 9:49 PM CDT reply actions

Henry James is that you?

by soonerspy on Oct 16, 2009 10:23 PM CDT reply actions

Nope, it’s me.

by TaylorTRoom on Oct 16, 2009 10:25 PM CDT reply actions

Man I can’t wait to fuck you guys up tomorrow.

by nordberg on Oct 16, 2009 10:26 PM CDT reply actions

It remains to be seen who is the fucker and who is the fuckee.

by soonerspy on Oct 16, 2009 10:36 PM CDT reply actions

I gotta second what Nord said. You fucks are getting donkey punched tomorrow. Sam’s eyes are going to be knocked straight only to be knocked crooked once again. Ship and Colt are going balls deep on Monique Franks, first under the bleachers, then down the sidelines. You’re going to be unranked after tomorrow, but fear not, you’ll still have the best team in Oklahoma. Better than Oral Roberts, better than Jenks, better than Tulsa Union. Gettin bitch slapped on the recruiting circuit, can’t hang with us on the field, time to bring back Switzer. The best part is, this was your last chance with us. Y’all are superfucked after this year.

by magnusbleuveigner on Oct 16, 2009 10:37 PM CDT reply actions

Spy my ass, you gotta fucking siphon tube hanging out of your back pocket, you’re dressed like Huck Finn, and you got a god damn bass up to your elbow. You tried to sneak in by bartering with poker chips and turqoise. You’re not spying shit.

I remember seeing a WWII movie where the American spy got found out because he wasn’t using his eating utensils like Europeans. Here you are, coming down here, and picking up everything with your hands like your Kobayashi desperately trying to regain his title from Joey Chesnutt. Again, I repeat, bad spying.

by magnusbleuveigner on Oct 16, 2009 10:55 PM CDT reply actions

Y’all are superfucked after this year.

No doubt. We’ve won the last three years in recruiting (overall, not each individual year), and we’re going to win this year. We’ll go into the 2011 recruiting cycle having won four of five RRS. We’re going to win that recruiting class, too.

by bigdukesix on Oct 16, 2009 11:30 PM CDT reply actions