Offensive press conference

REMAIN confident?

Yeah, what’s this “remain” shit? :)

You weren’t kidding about the “offensive” part.

Just looking at Chris Hall pisses me off. That guy follows Greg Davis straight to the dessert table at every team meal.

There are no atheists in foxholes on the Texas offensive line.

Colt is sick again.

Let’s face it: you’re afraid and you have a damn good reason to be. Albert Spear once said, “Fear is victory’s fuel!” Oh, you spend a few years with me, pal, and we are going to turn that fear into high octane.

Speer, imo.

Also. What?

Tom, are you from Tacoma, Washington, perchance?

We all know what is coming when the offense takes the field and it won’t be pretty. We have to win this one on defense.

It’s DisneyLAND you fucking communist.

I didn’t watch the video, but I read a quote from Colt where he basically said “We know we’re not going to have much success on Thursday”.

It reminded me of a similar quote from Vince Young in 2005. Wait, no it didn’t.

Fuck me running. Chris Hall must have just been laid for the first time five minutes before this press conference…by Minnie, while Mickey sat in the fucking corner videotaping!

I’ve watched 44 seconds. In that time, Hall has said “he is what he is” and quoted Bill Parcells.

I’m confident as shit now.

Unreal. Maybe this was some kind of mind fuck by Mack Brown. He couldn’t possibly have picked a less intimidating player to be interviewed than happy Hall there. If he was all you knew of the enemy before the game, how could you expect anything less than to dominate? I felt all along that Texas would need to win this one with defense, now I’m convinced it is the only way they’ll win it. I wonder how Studdard, Sindlein, and Blalock would treat Hall.

Can’t get it to load, but it sounds like I don’t really want to see it anyway.

I laugh involuntarily whenever Chris Hall takes the mike.

I really wish they weren’t already making excuses on offense. The defensive presser is a pretty good antidote, though.

Give Colt a break. He’s just been through a month of snide “rag doll” comparisons and recurring dreams of showing up to the Rose Bowl, ready to take the opening snap only to realize he’s forgotten his uniform. And pads. Stark naked in front of millions of leering eyes. Live the dream? Let’s hope not.

Chris Hall looks like a Care Bear. I really wish we had linemen with more tattoos or long hair. I’d like a Lattimore, but I’d settle for Nick Mangold.

This is the least intimidating press conference of all-time. I mean, I’m not sure we have a single physically intimidating player on the offense — certainly not any seniors — but this is ridiculous.

I watched it from start to finish. First, let me say that press conference is stone solid proof to why the mainstream media is in so much trouble. It’s roughly 32 minutes long and I put at least 25 minutes of that questions about Jordan Shipley’s age, the size of Colt’s home town, a hilariously offensive question about Shipley’s race, more questions about Colt’s home town, and other silly odds and ends.

The few football related questions I could actually glean information from indicated that the team is healthy after being pretty banged up at the end of the regular season, Alabama is schematically different than Nebraska at the DL (Nebraska is more aggressive/attack, Alabama more take up blockers/free up linebackers. The o-linemen place the blame of the Nebraska game on their execution, but that’s expected, they aren’t going to throw GD under the bus four days before the game (and if they did, we’d be f-cked). The rest of the football answers all came under the Nuke Laloosh “Happy to be here, 100%, God willingly, will be successful” variety.

Greg Davis mentioned both screen passes and the importance of play action to derail Alabama’s defense. The offense clearly understands they aren’t going to light up Alabama’s defense, but they seem to have faith in their game plan and claim to have good practices this week. Your mileage may vary on how much heartburn that last sentance gives you.

Overall, as somebody who works in politics and watches press conferences all the time, it was pretty bland stuff, including the Shipley race question, which from a professional perspective, is exactly what you want.

I don’t see anything wrong with the answers given to the running game question. Texas definitely needs to run the ball more cosistently.

Having watched most of it, I don’t quite get the same impression everyone else does. They were simply “on message”: Bama’s D is great, we’ll work hard, give the opponent credit, etc.

Honestly, Hall’s grin occasionally looked to me like he wanted to punch somebody, since every question to him was basically, You guys have sucked against the only two good defenses you played, how can you possible play well on Thursday?

Hall is incapable of wanting to punch somebody. He’s like an oversized Kenneth from 30 Rock. I think when he gets really angry at someone he just wants to hug them extra hard, or “Jesus Squeezes” as he likes to call them.

It could also be nerves. I work with a nervous smiler. They put on a shit eating green everytime they are faced with difficult/awkward situations.

Grin. Grin. Grin.

Chris Hall looks like a Boise State flag girl.

WTF was Mack thinking sending Hall? Even Longshanks sent Sophie Marceau instead of his faggotous progeny to mee WW. We couldn’t have sent the guy who’s going to win this for us, Hunter Lawrence?

No longer interested in Hall-bashing (though I’m liking the Braveheart reference). Sorry …

after reading comments i had to watch to press. con. Obviously watched a different one than you all. WWhada ya expect ? Want them to go into press conference and say " we are going to kick the crap out of a sorry ass team" Your responses for the most part were childish . Yh right ; go in there ( press) and hand them some ammunition !!!!!

It’s psychological warfare.

Just like the hidden, double-secret pages in the playbook that GD has been hiding.

Don’t spoil it.

C’mon BE, it’s like a reverse jinx. Usually we only make fun of his estrogen levels after Donkey Kong uses him for pleasure. Maybe if we do it in advance then it won’t happen. Same reason why I bet against my beloved Astros at the beginning of every year.

Play action is not going to work well unless the run game is working. In other words, play action is not going to work well.

Nine sacks is obcene. Colt has to throw the ball quickly, even if he is just throwing it away.

Ghost: Malcolm Williams is physically intimidating.

Glad to hear Colt talking about moving the chains.

Oh, I was serious when I said I was confident as shit now. And I haven’t even watched the defense presser yet. I honestly think we have this shit figured out, and we’ll see some fireworks Thursday night…I’m thinking similar to the Okie State game from this year, the Mizzou game from last year, or the ASU game from 2007. I’m also a bit loony, but fuck it, it’s almost go time!

When the offense talks about ‘execution’ and ‘consistency’ like they did in this presser, they usually come out flat and conservative.

Chris Hall is the definition of bad weight. He isn’t the type of guy who is fat but big, he’s a fat guy in a moderately large frame.

Same reason why I bet against my beloved Astros at the beginning of every year. – ghostofagroundgame

You like making money?

On the other side I thought the ’Bama defensive coordinator had the perfect answer when he was asked if he expected Texas to pull any dramatic changes on offense with a month to prepare.

He said, “If they do it is to our advantage because it means they don’t believe in what got them to this game.”

Huck — Well, there’s that too admittedly.

kafka — Malc isn’t a senior though.

srr – that is an interesting answer, and generally it makes sense.

However, if you see something you can exploit via a “dramatic change”, then that change is not necessarily made because you “don’t believe” in what got you to the game. Witness Bama running out of the spread initially vs Florida … wasn’t “lack of belief”, but it did seem to create uncertainty in (and thus slow down) Florida’s D.

I guess it depends on what one considers to be “dramatic” change…

The most interesting thing I got out of both press conferences was WM media management skills. He’s solid in a press conference. Less of a back slapping glad hander like Mack, but he’s good at stonewalling reporters with intelligent non answers. The defensive players on the second panel were, to be polite, quiet.

In the end, everyone mostly gave generic answers and looked to be painfully aware of the need to avoid generating bulletin board material. The Alabama reporters clearly think the Tide is going to crush Texas, as their questions generally had a leading quality to them in the “How are you dealing with the awesomeness of Alabama?” nature.

srr – in the defensive presser, listen to Will’s answer about how Bama changed it up vs Florida to hear another view about the value of (at least some level of) change.

“Chris Hall must have just been laid for the first time five minutes before this press conference…by Minnie, while Mickey sat in the fucking corner videotaping!”

The divorce judge said, “Mickey, you can’t get a divorce from Minnie just because you say she’s crazy.” Mickey said, “Judge, I didn’t say she’s crazy…I said she’s fucking Goofy.”

Who knew Chris Hall was Goofy?

If the ‘Horns first play from scrimmage is a wide reciever screen…it’s gonna be a long game.

Chris Hall…wow.

Loved the Braveheart reference. I don’t think “Sophie Marceau” was actually what her character went by, though. Weird.

kafka just posted the most concise thing he’s ever written. Things are really getting tight around here…

holy racially charged question at the 24 minute mark.

The first play, out of a trips right set, will be a pump fake right to Ship on the WR screen, Colt will then turn left and hit Malc in the seam for a glorious 80 yarder. At this point I’ll look down and tell Angelina Jolie to, “watch the teeth, baby”…

Hall looked like this in high school.

Maybe he’s like Samson.

Love the Boise State flag girl comparison. I rewinded that shot 3 times last night to try to calculate how much the big one with the dreds weighed. She looked like a fat pale Predator.

Texas wins this one one the basis of cheerleader looks alone. UT 13-10.

Best quote from the defensive press conference…

“We’re Texas. We’re gonna do what we do. We don’t copy anybody else.”

-Boom, when asked about watching other schools that may have had success against Bama. It’s at the 8 minute mark, and its said with utter disdain. And I think he swallows a belch at the end. My man-crush is getting obscene.

I’ve only seen that movie a couple hundred times and I still don’t know what her name was. I think it might have been ‘Princess Other Chick He Banged Who Was Extremely Hot And Who He Inseminated Which So Greatly Displeased The King That The Shock Of Finding Out About Said Impregnation Sent Him To His Timely Grave.’

I would much rather have 5 Hamish’s on the OL.

ctex80. I saw that too. The awesomeness of that quote defies description.

There sure are a lot of chicken littles on this page. Let’s remember a few things: GD is not a complete moron, despite his repeated attempts to prove differently; Florida had a LOT of dropped balls that would have drastically changed that game; McElroy is no Jerrod Johnson; and we have Will “by God” Muschamp. It’s ok to acknowledge that Bama has a great team (as they clearly do), but let’s not forget that We’re Texas.

How can you smile after shitting the bed over and over again and giving up 9 sacks and costing Colt the Heisman? Chris Hall needs to be slapped.

I will put on my Gator hat and see if it makes anyone feel any better that UF seemed to (inexplicably) completely abandon their typical gameplan against BAMA leading to a large dose of fail.

UF rushing attempts AVG. – 40 BAMA – 10
UF passing attempts REG. SEASON HIGH -26 BAMA – 35 (Comp % of 57%)

As a half-assed Gator follower I did not and still do not understand why they completely abandoned their typical gameplan. It resulted in a lopsided loss.

As a cynic I would say that they were looking to improve Tebus’ draft stock, but sacrificing a shot at the MNC seems like a foolish trade off. I think that the Sugar Bowl would support this theory (35 att – 88.6% – 482 yds.)

This dissertation was written with the hope of boosting the spirits of all of the GD doubters (myself included) who think that a change in philosphy may be the answer. At least get beat doing what you do best.

Cuz, by God "We’re Texas. We’re gonna do what we do. We don’t copy anybody else (except sometimes the Broncos or other teams that run a version of the Wildcat)."

“How can you smile after shitting the bed over and over again and giving up 9 sacks and costing Colt the Heisman?”

He’s taken it to the Cross, so it’s all good now.

That didn’t get me as upset as it did some of you. That looked like straight coach speak.

I don’t know about the Boise State flag girl but their drum major was a pretty hot chick (for a drum major) wearing a blue and orange sequin cocktail dress. Wish I could find a pic.

Overall the talent last night was solid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7V_odUM_yA&feature=related

Drum major at 56 sec mark. Nice moves!!!

As for movie references,

After watching that video I feel like Daniel Kaffee upon hearing that my star witness shot himself in the face.

Kaffee: Anyway, since we seem to be out of witnesses, I thought I’d drink a little.
Galloway: I still think we can win.
Kaffee: Then maybe you should drink a little.

He does think better with that bat.

Package, I think Hall has been slapped . A lot.

CJD —

Mike Piazza approves of that idea.

Nice drum major. I see that and think, “This one time at band camp….”

Of course the UT O should configure the offense for this particular game. UT should assume that UT can’t pass block well against Bama so UT is going to have to throw quickly and roll out Colt a lot. The good news is that Colt could run backwards and still outrun Mount Cody so there is no need to block Cody on rollouts. Rather than waste two blockers on Mount Cody, just run away from him.

The horns should also assume they will have to pass to set up the run. Running plays off of Colt’s rollout action will probably work OK. Kind of a reverse play action.

Colt has to look short first. Time of possession will be huge to avoid exhausting the horns’ D.

Anytime Colt sees a good opportunity to run (that is compatible with down and distance) he should run. Try to avoid taking the hit.

Don’t put Kirk on the same side as Ship. Ship needs somebody who can block for him on that side of the field.

Bama will pressure the WRs. Real quick crossing patterns should be effective.

When Colt rolls to Malcolm’s side, the CB covering Malcolm is frequently going to release Malcolm to a safety so the CB can pursue Colt. If Colt and Malcolm look for that, there should lots of easy passes to Malcolm right after the CB releases Malcolm.

The number 1 objective for Colt this game is to avoid turnovers. Don’t throw into double coverage. When he runs, keep two hands on the ball. Throw the ball on time or throw it away.

If the play GD calls is no good, then Colt needs to run something else.

I sure hope the horns have been working hard on screen plays.

The horns can win this game if they have realistic expectation for OL blocking limitations.

That was Hall? I thought it was a SNL skit with Haratio Sanz..

I wonder how much the lines in Vegas shifted after that press conference. Hall’s goofy smile has to be worth a 1.5 point swing.

I know they are just trying to be vanilla, but that was just embarrassing.

Thought we were going to win by throwing out logic, but after that there is only so much cover up, to say what Chris says, “we are what we are” a bunch goody two shoes on the o line.

Am I the only one too stupid to figure out motherfucking silverlight?

“If the play GD calls is no good, then Colt needs to run something else.”

Ha ha ha ha.

Actually, my reaction was quite the opposite; I’m thrilled at this blase conference.
I saw a bunch of very disciplined guys, giving prepared answers and staying on message. Nothing in that press conference is going on the walls of the Bama locker room and that’s a job well done.

He does think better with that bat.

Thank you for playing should we or should we not follow the advice of the galactically stupid!

Hall reminds me of a quote from Gran Torino: “You’ve got no balls, kid. You’ve got no teeth.”

Thats good stuff.
“Take these three items, some WD-40, a vise grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone.” -Im sure Hall could do more with a teddy bear, micky mouse shirt, and a game of catch phrase.

How does Hall spend 5 years in a weight program and come out looking like that? He clearly has not put the work in to be the best he can be.

I like the way some people on here are still looking for Malcolm Williams to have a breakout game. Blind optimism is good.

I just caught a portion of this interview/presser on FSSW and in that H.S. pic up thread, Hall looks like a veritable Mike Tyson compared to his friggin’ current Louis Winthorpe III persona (pardon the Trading Places reference).

WTF. The guy just looks and acts way too much like a pussy (or future asshole lawyer, of course) for me now even to believe he is remotely effective on the field. I just can’t believe it.

OK. I can.

Ranson:

Malcolm had
5 catches for 53 yards vs Mizzou,
5 catches for 67 yards vs UCF,
6 catches for 103 yards vs KU,
9 catches for 132 yards vs A&M.
 
Those are 4 pretty good games, especially the A&M game. He drops an easy one every now and then but also makes some tough catches. He is the most likely UT WR to take a short pass and get good YAC. He is also the best blocking WR UT has.

Wasn’t Malcolm’s breakout game vs Tech in 2008?

Sugarpants:
What is so funny about Colt overriding a bad call by GD? Colt is a coach’s son, a 5th year senior who has started at QB for 4 full years. Why stay in a bad play call? Bama mentioned that Colt rarely audibles, why is that?

im in japan. sports bars do not open at 10 am. how can i watch the damn game online.

You can catch the game online at Justin TV. Because you’re overseas (as am I) you’ll have to pay $10 for a month’s access. Gotta warn you, the picture quality is not great. Watchable, though, and better than nothing.

kafka —

I’m not sure that Colt is permitted to check down from plays. If he is then he rarely does so. It seems more likely that he is not.

He audibles rarely which means he must not be prohibited from audibling. GD has said that he expects Colt to get him out of bad play calls (i.e. reality is that sometimes the DC makes the better call on a play). I don’t see why Colt does not audible more often.

kafka —

It happens so rarely that I wondered whether he was allowed to do it. There are many times I can recall when the play call and the defensive set were terrible fits, and it seems like we never go from a pass to run, or vice-versa. It seems almost like a Kubiak-Schaub situation (which, btw, is the reason why I think the Texans need to either fire Kubiak or get rid of Schaub — if a dude starts at QB for you for three years and you either don’t trust him to make audibles or are too controlling to allow him to do so then there is something seriously wrong with your system).

“I think when he gets really angry at someone he just wants to hug them extra hard, or "Jesus Squeezes" as he likes to call them.”

Side hugs.

It would be cool if hall transformed as soon as he hit the field,get your fn hands off my my qb.