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Colorado: Broke Ass Mountain

Colorado wants out of the Big 12 ASAP and they're currently in negotiations with the league to leave in 2011 rather than 2012. The only problem is that Colorado is broke. Dead-ass broke. So broke that they couldn't afford Dan Hawkins' buyout after his 4th consecutive losing season in Boulder.

Star-divide

If they can't afford to pay 3 million to Dan Hawkins to start him on his second career as a Landmark Forum Seminar Instructor - you have to do the work in here (points at heart), and here (points at head), so no more bathroom breaks until you people start GETTING REAL with each other - how exactly does Colorado propose absorbing the loss of a 10 million dollar revenue withhold from the Big 12 as part of their penalty for being realignment sluts?

Colorado AD Mike Bohn believes that there is a considerable amount of ambiguity in the ironclad Big 12 league contract which states in Section V, Article 3a, line 4 (and I'm paraphrasing):

If Colorado goes to the Pac 10, we get all of their shit.

I'm not a lawyer (though Farmer Ted is), but that's really specific language. Ipso facto indomitus a la biblioteca, IMO.

Does Colorado have any fungible assets that one could turn around quickly to raise some money and keep the lights on? Aside from tickets to a Phish concert, a lacrosse stick, and a copy of High Times magazine with Seth Rogen on the cover?

Well, one.

Don't shoot the messenger....

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They have sluts with hairy legs. Perhaps they could trade us some sluts with hairy legs, free lift tickets and bales of kind bud?

How about the mineral rights to one of their mountains next to campus and we could strip mine it?

by hornin hong kong on Jul 5, 2010 6:31 PM CDT reply actions  

I can understand why UNL went over to the dark side, but I cannot see the motivation for CU. It is unlikely their fortunes will turn any time soon regardless of conference affiliation.

by Bill Bixby on Jul 5, 2010 6:49 PM CDT reply actions  

It’s refreshing to know another Big XII school made as bad a football coaching hire as we did with Fran. Unfortunately for them their coach isn’t stupid enough to start an insider newsletter.

by Aggie Lurking on Jul 5, 2010 8:28 PM CDT reply actions  

Our CU guys will be along in September with a harsh rebuke of this presumptuous blog article!

by Vasherized on Jul 5, 2010 8:28 PM CDT reply actions  

Do the CU admins smoke pot?

by Forged Iron on Jul 5, 2010 9:29 PM CDT reply actions  

They’ll do almost as well as the ags would have done in the SEC – perennial 3-6 or in a good year 6-3 team.

by Cimarrones on Jul 5, 2010 9:37 PM CDT reply actions  

But – of course that’s pertty much what both of them are in the Big 12, also.

by Cimarrones on Jul 5, 2010 9:38 PM CDT reply actions  

Bill Bixbey,

Colorado had to make the move to ensure not getting left behind if Texas had to take Baylor as one of the 6 to move from the Big 12 to Pac 16. It was actually a pretty solid move for them or else they might have had to be conference rivals with Colorado St.

by dick on Jul 5, 2010 9:45 PM CDT reply actions  

The Related Articles for this post are highly recommended and recall the halcyon days of this western outpost.

by Vasherized on Jul 5, 2010 9:47 PM CDT reply actions  

Ralphie versus Bevo would be worth watching.

A buffalo is stronger, but Bevo seems stealthy, somehow.

by parlin on Jul 5, 2010 10:47 PM CDT reply actions  

Agree with Bill. What the hell were they going to do if Texas was taking Baylor? Solid move at the time

by Mysterious Package on Jul 5, 2010 10:49 PM CDT reply actions  

My bad, I agree with DIck on the response to Bill

by Mysterious Package on Jul 5, 2010 10:50 PM CDT reply actions  

Buffalo is delicious.

by Triston27 on Jul 6, 2010 8:21 AM CDT reply actions  

So the PAC10 offered to take CU no matter what Texas did and CU jumped without knowing how it would play out? Risking the penalties in desperation? Just to keep Baylor out? OK, but it sounds more like panic instead of due diligence.

But then, due diligence got us the Big12-2. Dodds finished making up for two REALLY bad coaching hires all in one week. Give the man another raise.

by Bill Boxley on Jul 6, 2010 10:30 AM CDT reply actions  

“Buffalo is delicious.”

Can be kinda dry if overcooked, very lean.

by TOR on Jul 6, 2010 10:42 AM CDT reply actions  

Everyone assumed the Big 12 was splintering once Nebraska left.
 
Colorado took a slight gamble but the odds at the time looked very much in their favor.

by Scipio Tex on Jul 6, 2010 1:52 PM CDT reply actions  

Sometimes I think that maybe Dodds, Castiglione, and (maybe) whoever is the actual voice of authority at A&M got together and said…
Castiglione: “Dodds, I’ll bet you a dollar if we keep this conference together, we can fuck Nebraska and Colorado out of 10 million each.”
Dodds: “Sounds magnificent. You’re on. We’re all still going to the Pac-10 in 2012, though.”
Castiglione: “Of course.”

by NateHeupel on Jul 6, 2010 3:50 PM CDT reply actions  

Did somebody say “lean”?

by Jamarcus Russell on Jul 6, 2010 4:03 PM CDT reply actions  

Colorado and Leach

I think what is missing here is the desperation of Colorado.

I won’t reveal my source, so let’s just call all this rumor. Mike Leach wasn’t formally approached this year by Colorado due to the contract buy out problem and the law suit with Tech. The conference shake up is pushing things into place.

Leach is the top pick on their radar after he finishes his lawsuit. He has not had formal talks with the school, but his unemployability fits perfectly into Colorado’s plan right now. Hawkins is a lame duck now.

Colorado is desperate and making bold moves. Leach provides instant press and buzz.

Why? Controversy, plus his style of football will serve them well in the Pac 10 and their fat TV contracts. He is also the most successful available coach with proven bowl appearances, quality wins, and rep as a winning giant crusher football coach. Yes his methods questionable, but nothing a very well written publicized contract won’t iron out from a PR perspective.

They will be in a new conference in 2011 (if they get their way) and want a proven winning coach to shake up a dismal program, not just another hire with “potential”.

Those retarded couch burners really don’t care if a kid gets locked in a shed every once in a while to get them back on the map. This is the mighty Colorado, and they are facing yet another “rebuild”.

Leach still wants his money from Tech, so that has to get finished. That gives Colorado the time they need as well, as they put Hawkins on “his last chance to turn the program around” if you know what I’m sayin sayin.

This next year is a wash. The Buffalos have senioritis for the Pac 10 and the season hasn’t even started yet, but that doesn’t mean a thing. They are on 4th down deep in their own territory and looking for a river boat gambler.

by Saltshaker on Jul 8, 2010 12:08 PM CDT reply actions  

Saltshaker -
 
Good stuff. Very intriguing. I hadn’t considered Leach at all.

by Scipio Tex on Jul 8, 2010 12:39 PM CDT reply actions  

That’s a really great call Saltshaker. Leach would be a great fit in Boulder. Their fanbase (both students and alumni) are even wilder than Tech’s are in my experience. They would love him up there.

Honestly I think almost any school’s fanbase would come to love Leach. Dude is awesome.

by hodad on Jul 9, 2010 10:36 AM CDT reply actions  

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by Destiny Santana on Feb 5, 2011 6:14 PM CST reply actions  

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