Gundy's Coaching Tanning Bed Is On Fire

Shitbird is a word I don’t hear nerely enough.

You’ll hear it in every Pickens article.

HipHop -
 
You should get a shitbird ring tone.

I also approve the use of shitbird, and will proliferate its use today.

Resetting “Magic Shell” and “Brut” in the same paragraph. Nice, although “Chaz” would have been better.

It would be interesting to see OkState run more of a Leach-style offense under Holgorsen. My offhand impression is that they might have better talent than Tech (arguable point, to be sure), which could make for an interesting experiment.

I have to say that I’m not thrilled at the prospect of another descendent of the Stoops coaching tree coming back to the Big XII.

“they lost the most personnel to graduation”

See also: “expired eligibility”. Methinks they don’t graduate many guys up at Okie Lite, but I’m too lazy to check.

“each mounting loss weighs on Gundy’s visored brow like an early tee time after a hangover”

I don’t want Gundy to stay in the league for his remarkable mediocrity. I want him to stay solely for Golf Prick purposes.

Levander -
 
We will burn that coaching tree down. But first they will blow us.
 
Colorado -
 
Stoops is a real solid golf prick. Not Gundy level, obviously.
 
Pinkel has some golf prick tendencies, but just doesn’t seem like he’d phantom putt in a hallway.

It don’t make a shitbird.

Until it does.

There is a lurker on this site whose nickname in high school was Shitbird.

You know who you are.

nordberg -
 
Who is she?

I don’t think T. Boone realizes that he’s been jacking off a dead dog all these years.

Who would do that for YEARS?
 
A week, tops.

I must go see this great wildcatter in the sky. Is he in trailer park land or where he should be?

Offense hasn’t been the problem up there in Stillwater….even Pickens should realize that. Should have put some of that quarter billion in a defensive coordinator. Glad he didn’t …just sayin….even the boss can be wrong.

derryl -
 
I hear you, but DC Bill Young is pretty well regarded. I’m not sure what the disconnect is up there.
 
I think part of the reason for hiring an OC is that Pickens didn’t want Gundy with his back to the defense during games diagramming plays for the O.
 
And OSU scored 7 against Ole Miss, 14 against Texas, and got shut out by OU. That was all of the pretext T Boone needed.
 
It also sets up a succession, as outlined in my article.

You guys need to read more James Ellroy.

Texas will be blessed this football season with not one, but two visits from Crown Princes of Golf Prickdom.

Say Hi! to the West Coast version -Rick Nueheisel.

We will burn that coaching tree down. But first they will blow us.

Funniest thing you’ll read all day.

And Bill Young will get the defense on the right track. I wish we still had him at KU, too bad he hated Mangino and took his talents to South Beach a few years back.

I might overuse ‘shitbird’.

It’s the late 00’s version of ‘asshat’.

I guess I’m too homophobic to get the kick you do from the “first they will blow us” quip. Glad you enjoy it.

Gundy hasn’t got a chance after the Pickens appointment of the oc. Dead man walking.

Uh, I think “first they will blow us” was meant figuratively, not literally.

Most college football fans have come around to the notion that Adam James is a trouble-making brat, that Craig James is a stage mom of the highest order, and that his employer, ESPN, biased their coverage considerably covering the affair. Even though Leach did almost everything wrong and is a weird cat to boot.

Well, concussions were the shark attacks of 2010, and Leach built his pirate reputation by saying stupid things and refusing to apologize for them (such the rebel!) like an alcoholic ten year old, so the two were bound to collide. It was the transistable force meeting the irrumable object.

Good thing there are others who can run the spread, so that no one actually needs to hire Leach and his baggage.

2009, sorry. I’m getting ahead of myself.

OK, no more Catullus puns.

I think it’s more in the Mel Colm-Cille Gerard Gibson sense.

Shitbird is a timeless term used to describe an underachieving non-hacker. Marines young and old salute you for sharing shitbird with your readership and for reminding us of those tender moments we shared with our Drill Instructors…

It’ll be fun to see Leach at Stoolwater.

Would be fun but I can’t imagine Leach coming to Stillwater. Can you imagine the confused look on Boones face when Leach starts rambling on about shit unrelated to football?

Anyways Boone probably needs to calm the fuck down, but he’s old. The stadiums only been finished for a year and we’re the only school in the Big 12 with no indoor facility. 18 wins in two years is one of the best periods in OSU football history.

Iba,

Based on the experiences of a vast number of people who have dealt with T. Boone’s propensities for the last 20+ years throughout Oklahoma and Texas, I can assure you that patience is not amongst his virtues. You probably know that better than most.

In addition, when you look at a guy who’s spent his life making billions off of oil and gas, and now his big project is “the Pickens Plan” which relies heavily on green technologies like wind and solar power and reducing America’s use of oil, you have to realize you’re looking at a man who doesn’t care HOW he wins as long as he wins. If Pickens thinks bringing the Dread Pirate Leach and the S.S. Scarlet Letter to dock in Stillwater is going to get OSU Big 12 titles and BCS games, you can bet that he’ll do it without regard for the consequences.

Scip,
OSU’s biggest problem, in my opinion, is that ever since Karl Dunbar left to coach for the Chicago Bears back in the beginning of the decade, their DL scouting and development has been atrocious. Many of them taunted OU fans over picking up Ugo Chinasa after OU picked a late bloomer named Jeremy Beal. That’s worked out well, I think. On a macro level, between Muschamp and Venables, there’s just not any top shelf defensive talent left available at any position. Going through OU and UT’s commit lists to date, I don’t see a single defensive recruit on OSU’s list that I think Venables or Muschamp would go after.

It’s also important to remember that Herschel Sims didn’t commit to OSU until after OU pulled their offer with Brandon Williams’ commit. The eyes of Tejas are set firmly on Malcolm Brown. I would think this would be a lesson to future recruits for both OU and Texas to be aware of the depth of talent available at your position when you’re making your decision and setting your timeframe.

My biggest fear right now is that we start buying players, if we’re not already. We end up winning something important and then Boone dies and we get stuck with the bill.

Nate -
 
I can’t disagree. There hasn’t been a Kevin Williams at OSU in a long time. Like A&M, their inability to develop DL has really hamstrung them. Mizzou, by contrast, has done a pretty nice job with a similar talent selection base.
 
The RB talent was really good in-state this year. The #1 guy last year would be #5 or #6 this year. We’ll look back on this group and see four or five big-time hits. Herschel has a good shot at being one of them. His ability out of the backfield as a pass catcher is pretty extraordinary. If he’s a 800 rush/500 receive guy as a freshman I’ll be shocked not at all.
 
I’m still irritated you got Brandon Williams. He is the definition of a high ceiling blue chip.

I’ve been rousted from my slumber to add a few more to the Scipio lexicon:

Fart knocker
Turd blossom and
Dingleberry

how can you say “Brut” without “By Faberge”?

Whats the point?

I always say Right Guard! byyyyyyyyy Mennen!

I like Mike Leach, but I’m not interested in him as a football coach. I’m interested in Mike Gundy