The Best Party Schools In America: Texas #6

I always had Clipper pegged as a Vandy grad, the majority of those I have met make the Coopster seem like a well adjusted middle class kid.

UGA ranks right up there with me. I haven’t been there for a football game, but have been there several times during the spring and summer and the talent is indeed first rate, it values live music, and has the feel of Austin when I was in school (and the city was smaller and less bureaucratic).

University of Iowa Didn’t know this.

Walking through downtown Iowa City on a weekend morning is the equivalent of visiting a bus station toilet after a Greyhound full of drunken Shriners has finished puking and peeing in it.

The University has actually started giving faculty bonuses for teaching Thursday and Friday morning classes. Thursday and Friday.

Vandy is proliferated with high grade mega-douche, but real academics preclude someone like Clipper going there.

parlin -
 
That’s hilarious stuff.
 
srr50 –
 
Your endorsement is a valuable one for UGA as I know you’ve seen a lot of campuses. No question that would be enjoyable place to go to school, annual Florida beating excepted.

Now wait a god damn minute. I have two issues with what you said about Texas. The first is that we engineers knew how to party. I mean come one, we would drink beer with our professors as we studied at lunch at Posse East. That’s a hella good time, man. The second is that the business school doesn’t belong in the same sentence as the engineering school. That’s where our rejects went to get a degree.

That girl looks a little confused.

Your Penn State take is spot-on. I had the displeasure of visiting State College on a few occasions when my little sis and her husband were studying phrenology there. It’s a dismal, remote place. And I question the inclusion of any school from Pennsylvania, where liquor sales are tightly regulated, on a list of party schools.

I’ve not yet met anyone from Ole Miss that isn’t Clipper Cooper.

I’ve met exactly one Ole Miss graduate, and he fits the bill perfectly. White. Preppy. Socially elitist. Lawyer.

Huck -

The second is that the business school doesn’t belong in the same sentence as the engineering school. That’s where our rejects went to get a degree.

Times have changed since we were in school. The engineering college is picking from B-school rejects nowadays.

Huck is correct. God I miss Posse, Crown and Anchor, and that mexican place in between. They had $1 magaritas on Wednesdays. Classes were so much better after a pitcher or two.

Brick – If that’s true, then we have been shamed.

06 – Yeah, it’s a nice way to spend lunch but obviously the general theme was true. Engineering parties sucked. If we wanted to go to a real party, we didn’t exactly find the best ones in the ETC building.

Great work, as always. Still cleaning the Dr. Pepper off the screen of my computer screen.

Great work, as always. Still cleaning the Dr. Pepper off the screen off my computer screen.

It is 10 times harder to get into the Business School. Even if we did not have to take 60 hours of calculus.

But you enjoy your engineering degree and lower average salary.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I give you Exhibits A through ZZZ double-prime

“I feel like we’d be Top 3 if we’d get rid of our engineering and business schools. Nerds.”

Hey! Now, wait a minute! That’s not right!

…No. Actually, it is right. Unless you think a party can still be great without pretty girls, and not even the gay guys think that.

I have to agree with Huck here because I’m a B-school grad.

As for the list. UNLV has to be on here, and I’ll show you the proof this fall, Scipio. Where else can you take a class at the sportsbook in Caesar’s Palace?

UNLV is a dreary commuter school set in a handful of corporate buildings. There isn’t a blade of grass on the campus and 1/3 of the students have meth habits.
 
I wonder if you can take a history class with bottle service?

It is 10 times harder to get into the Business School. Even if we did not have to take 60 hours of calculus

This pretty much sums it up. These days, the smart kids compete like hell to gain admission to the business school, which doesn’t exactly offer a rigorous course of study. It’s a misallocation of intellectual resources, really. And, no, I’m not one to talk.

Did they clean up SDSU? I thought that school was a fixture on this list. I hear they, like ASU, prefer to prepare some lines before class, snort them, and then go on their merry way.

The smartest guy I know is a surgical oncologist. He switched majors from engineering to biomedical sciences. He still maintains that the engineering courses were tougher. Not tough mind you, just tougher.

Godzilla, it’s spelled ‘Doctor Pepper.’

Sewanee’s on the list. Toadvine, opine.

Actually, it’s spelled “Dr Pepper” you ignorant twat.

Sorry, Newy’s got me all emotional with his hatred.

I would almost bet that there are more Clipper Coopers at Tech than any school in the Big 12. Half the graduating classes of ESD, Memorial and Westlake end up settling there. Those ESD dudes are fun to party with and they pay for everything.

No University of Alabama? Hard to believe. Like Texas, UA has legions of drop-dead gorgeous women [but with the distinct advantage of honeysmooth Southern accents that make a man want to beat his head against a stump], beautiful party venues, great weather, etc. But for pure, out and out, drunk-ass non-stop partying, UA beats Texas hands down.

I want to thank all of you business school and engineering dorks for proving my point. This is why we’re slipping. Your time would be better spent plying Pakistani TAs with jagermeister if you really wanted to make a difference.

Princeton Review’s 2010 Dad of the Year #13 says there is always time for a party and pics:

http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local-beat/Barracudas-Leave-their-Bite-on-Two-Unsuspecting-Girls—99857644.html

Oh shit Huckleberry, really? I may be a twat….

http://barkingcarnival.fantake.com/2010/07/10/big-twelve-hearted-league/

I want to thank to all of you business school and engineering dorks for proving my point. This is why we’re slipping.

If you think Texas’ engineering school is lame, try getting the Chinese and Turkish grad students in the electromagnetics lab at Illinois to party. Most boring 18 months of my life. The ENS was an animal house by comparison.

I started in business school. Most of the students I met seemed a little full of themselves. Transferred in to ChemE.

It seemed like about half of my class went on to law school or med school.

Clipper Cooper to Dr House. I traded one set of pricks for another.

Huckleberry an engineer? Damn who knew. I always pegged him for a fine arts guy.

I understand CU doesn’t deserve to be on this list—The women are of course too hygienically challenged to rate top party school status well except maybe the Chi-o’s —, but they deserve honorable mention for the ability to generally wreck shit and set it on fire. The destructive capability of the CU undergraduate is unmatched in all of academia.

i am pretty sure most clipper’s i’ve met went to SMU

If you think Texas’ engineering school is lame, try getting the Chinese and Turkish grad students in the electromagnetics lab at Illinois to party. Most boring 18 months of my life. The ENS was an animal house by comparison.

Did a dude named Lazlo live in your closet and go on to game the state lottery and buy an RV?

The exclusion of the wild underwater parties thrown by the oceanographers at Scripps Pomona is damning. Does anybody do actual research on this shit anymore?

Or the Carpet Munching Carnival at Bowdoin on the first Thursday of spring?

bateshorn could tell some good stories of trying to have sex with an ice fishing hole. But I doubt he will. I wouldn’t either.

Very disappointed, yet not surprised, by the lack of performance by Agricultural and Mechanical in this area.

Seriously, the school isn’t the same place as when I was there – only high SAT scores get in – studying all the time – people doing RESEARCH!

They’ve ruined the place and made it into a great big Rice University. Damn them….

No, that’s not it….

Ag_in_TX,

TAMU accepts 70%+ percent of its applicants; it is a mentally deficient man’s Rice University.

http://colleges.usnews.rankingsandreviews.com/best-colleges/college-station-tx/texas-a%26m-college-station-10366

I’ve been to the U of Iowa once on a football weekend. Had to bail a friend out of jail. Another passed out in an alley and we didn’t find him until the morning. Good times.

Mizzou was #17 in the poll. Used to be better before the guy got electrocuted climbing a utility pole during a big greek-town party. Then the campus went dry…. My life has not been easy.

I have 2 undergrads from UT and got my Master’s from Ohio U. When I got up there they all bragged about what a party school they were. To be honest, it wasn’t anything that I hadn’t seen before, but by the time I finished I had a new respect. Great street parties where everyone would throw in and buy 30 kegs and bring a band. It was a great time.
But all that pales in comparison to the parties and topless fire twirling at the 2st st coop. Not to mention I was disappointed with their famous Halloween jam. It just doesn’t compare to sixth street.

Scipio, did you watch the Jon Jones fight Sunday? Who do you think he fights next? Alot of the top light heavyweights are tied up for the next several months, so the options appear limited. I saw an article on Sherdog that said it might be Rich Franklin.

Then the campus went dry…. My life has not been easy.
 
WTF?!!!!
 
The University of Missouri is waging a war on good times.

kevwun -
 
Yeah, he’s amazing. I’ll be putting up a MMA thread soon.

i went to depauw and when i was there we were ranked #4. the fact that i’m gone is the only reason it dropped so low in the first place.

As a finance/premed undergrad, I spent 5% of my homework time on business, 95% on science. Then when I quit premed (coincidentally right before I turned 21), I spent 5% of my homework time on business, and 95% on drinking.

The business school, possibly aside from the 5-year MPA, is a joke. It takes the top 5% of the HS graduating class, but accepts transfers if you get a 3.5 freshman GPA, even if it’s taking shit like Human Sex or Kiddie Lit. So basically you get the people that are smart enough not to try in high school, or the freshmen that are smart enough to game the system. Now that I think about it, that sounds exactly like the business world.

By the way, the LSU chick? Stellar.

Wow, two DePauw grads on Barking Carnival. Long odds on that one.

Glad to see my alma mater snuck in the top 10. Well done, Tigers.

DePauw is a real school? I always thought it was just how DePaul speech therapy grads pronounced the name of their alma mater.

Bastard.

Ag In TX,

We don’t do enough drugs. Lots of Joe 12 Pack country boys talking grill guards and yes ma’am no ma’am.

I’ve had the opportunity to party at many schools. LSU is the wildest band of loons I’ve ever encountered.

ASU is still crying in their beer over the number six ranking in the Playboy list:

http://jaypgreene.com/2010/04/19/sun-devils-crushed-by-number-six-finish-in-playboy-party-rankings/

Dan Quayle went to DePauw. It’s kind of like the Vandy of Indiana where all the not so bright but politically connected kids go.

Growing up in Atlanta, I’ve been to most SEC schools. Athens is a solid choice for Top 5 & your position on UF is exactly right.

IMO…
UTK is under-rated. Great talent without a lot of the pretenses of neighboring schools.
UA is fun but those kids think too much of what others think of them to really cut it loose.
MissSt is full of kids that are bitter that they’re at their safety school.

If I’m picking a Big 10 school, I’d take Michigan State.

There is one bar in Tusacalosa so no. UGA yes. UT tops them all however

This thread makes me chuckle. You’re all fucking nerds who don’t know how to party, but you’re still nice guys who enjoy football. I like you guys and stuff, but come on. Way too much Hemingway and other meaningful author rhetoric to be very hard partiers.

ded, I’ve drunk you under the table once…don’t make me do it again.

He’s a dead man. Those Tech guys are all talk. Party man says you ain’t got sh!t. This is the guy who made UT and Ohio U the party place. You might want to watch out, some drunk freshman fell once, knocking his head on every beam.

Scip,

Great Peter King jab.

You’re from El Paso. A total anomaly.

This thread has made me reflect on my days in college. While I may have done a shit ton of drinking and (engineering) ‘partying’ i realized that maybe I did help contribute to holding the school back in the party rankings. I do think as a ChemE our parties were probably a bit better than the average engineering party because of the higher percentage of girls in ChemE. And by that I mean it wasn’t a 10-1 male-female ratio. If you had yellow fever, you were in luck.

Thing is, Texas can never be a top party school cuz Austin offers too many other fun things to do. You go to school in Chico or Akron or Baton Rouge or State College, there’s ONLY partying… no club scene, no skinny dipping, no road trips to Mexico…

One important criterion overlooked when discussing party schools (major specific as well) is the absence of nearby natural resources (bars, clubs, liquour stores, tities, etc).

Engineers at UT produce some wonderfully scripted parties. Do we have natural talent? No. But neither does China. We import that shit. It’s not like we speak only Linux for fuck sake. Work hard. Play hard. Those Business school pussies could never hang. Of course they had fraternity-esque resources that make it difficult for any program north of Speedway to compete. Either way, we have just as many STD’s and convictions per capita as those fuckers at McCombs.

Not that anyone asked for my opinion, but Clippy is the essence of every SMU-mo I’ve ever met. Lucky for me they were all ubber-gay Greekies, which allowed me to swoop in and steel their pills and women.

Lastly, if you haven’t experienced a LSU tailgate, than you’ll never have an apt comparable.

Tech’s where I went to test Chlamydia strains. I look forward to drinking with you till you are up to your knees in floor, ded.

This is my knowledge is good party list in no particular order:

SDSU
Texas
Arizona State
Chico State
Ole Miss
Bama
UGA
Texas State
Ohio State
LSU

Ingredients for a good party school is a combo of several factors listed below:

Large student body
Warm weather
Thin girls
Good football program
Low admission standards
Lower tuition rates
Strong greek presence
Southern attitude
Weathly student population
Strong College Bar scene

Some attributes are interdependent. Warm weather equals women with less SOFA attributes.

The engineering culture is changing rapidly in regards to the type of guys that are currently in the school as compared to the past. Sure, there is a severe lack of pussy; as there always will be (It’s proven women have smaller brains; just ask Borat). This is pure bullshit, but I would say back in the day, I’d estimate from my Pop’s buddies who were engineers, the ratio of normal guys to geeks was about 1:4. Today I’d say, 1/3 of the class will be Greeks, 1/3 normal guys, & 1/3 geeks. Half of those geeks will become potheads by the time they graduate, and so in a sense, they have developed the social skills required to be portrayed as somewhat normal.

The hardest thing about the BSchool is getting in. I was originally in the business school and transferred out as well, as I quickly realized I would end up with an empty diploma in which I learned nothing new (I went to private school & boarding school) while doing copious amounts of busy work. The BSchool is just that, a bunch of BS. The only reason people are paid more has to due with the connections the school has with employers and the corporate tradition, which promotes empty suits. I would never hire anyone out of that school (Undergrad) to lead a company as these people have never been mentally challenged in a class and would probably fail in a pressure situation, regardless of how many case studies they have reviewed. You can take that to the bank.

From someone who has gone to both UT and FSU, I can tell you the folks in Tallahassee go just as hard if not harder than God’s People in Austin. However, the city of Tallahassee itself is exactly like Austin if you took out everything cultural and interesting…

Still, FSU deserves placement in the top 10 for the eye candy alone. If UT was an 8.0 – 8.5 in that category, FSU is an easy 9.5…

Enter the famous Jenn Sterger, so to speak:

http://www.google.com/#hl=en&&sa=X&ei=SgpZTPStNIiosQPXsfCYCg&ved=0CBgQBSgA&q=jenn+sterger&spell=1&fp=cf6de65455308b5f

Mizzou could drink Sewanee under the table. I don’t care what Princeton says.

ded, this guy was well read…..

http://www.ehow.com/how_5108933_make-martini-according-winston-churchill.html

….and boy did he know how to properly make a martini.

I partied at Texas a few times over the years. A lot of fun. I can’t say I ever felt in danger or near the edge. I can’t say the same thing when amphetamines are mixed with pipe bombs. On top of Trips’ tequila. Of course, I was a member of an elite redneck unit that scared even the Tech crowd. More like the Jeremiah Masoli role. The guy asking questions like is it a good idea to use that much gun powder or how long am I going to jail if we get pulled over. I’m burned out now.

Yeah, I noticed a lot of pain behind those eyes ded. I recognized it because I’ve partied in Clarendon for a semester or two.

Sewanee is the school for people who want to be William Faulkner but lack the SATs and grades to get into Vanderbilt. Usually they lack the SATs and grades because they spent high school in Macon, Birmingham, or some other Southern backwater consuming massive amounts of pharmaceuticals and drinking whiskey, two habits the students continue through college and life.

 Point is, it’s not a “party school” in the sense that you go to “parties.” It’s a “party school” in the sense that New Orleans is a “party town” when you live in a previously flooded house in the Bywater and get knee-walking drunk every night at the corner bar. It’s a place where EVERYONE “parties” as an actual lifestyle — it’s not for college and it’s not for show. On that basis alone it deserves its spot.

Mizzou, on the other hand, well — you flat-landers probably need to blot out the oblivion of your continued existence as badly as anyone, but your Mid-Western sensibility will interject at some point on the way down. I’m sorry, but you can’t match the studied depravity of the fading landed gentry of the Deep South.

You’re also wearing an Alex Torres jersey right now, aren’t you?

I don’t understand how any Big 10 school could possibly top Wisconsin on this list. Every UW grad (or drop/failout) I’ve met can drink truly ludicrous amounts of beer. A ninety pound cheerleader from my high school went there and came back able to drink everybody under the table that freshman summer.

In Wisconsin there is literally nothing else to do but drink from October-April and a significant portion of the state economy is booze related. They don’t have nazi party police up there like they do down here either. Up there the cops are more likely to come into the house and have a brew or ten themselves.

coupla thoughts-

1. a dry school like Mizzou doesnt belong on the list. period.

2. yes, LSU and ASU being left off the list is a travesty. I have friends goin to ASU. Girls go to class in bikini tops during the summer months (which in phoenix is really like start of march- end of october). awesome.

3. SDSU & Chico State- both have reputations, but neither really match those reputations.
I guess SDSU does if youre talking bout crazy. but they arent enjoyable crazy. and i want my party list to be enjoyable crazy. waaaaay to much hard drugs and super trashy girls make SDSU unenjoyable. sorry. And Chico… its just a bunch of cal state student (which means they aint that bright) who go off to a place in bumf*ck egypt to do whatever they want. really nothing special. and the talent there is non-existent.

*students

Newy25,

You, sir, are misinformed.

The Cockrell School’s bachelor’s degree recipients have a higher average starting salary than do McCombs’ bachelor’s degree recipients; $69,144 versus $58,819.

Let’s be clear, Toad turned Vandy down.

I’ve partied at Mizzou a few nights. Never met a bigger bunch of belligerent fuckhead drunks in my entire life. While I was up there half the conversations started with " So, like ummmmm dont we party hard?" They don’t drink more than your average Oklahoma State student yet act like complete assholes. The women I saw wern’t great either.

In 2007 I went to Georgia to see OSU get their teeth kicked in. That was a hell of a scene. I was only there for a game day but the poon, the bar scene and the remote location have to put UGA in the top 5.

In Stillwater I could go out and drink myself impotent 4 nights a week and all it took was a $5 dollar cover. That has to count for something right?

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