Making The Football Good

Oh, thank god.

The amount of collective vagina rubbing in Longhorn Nation has made me swear off porn this week. And that’s saying a lot.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Holy shit! Watching these in succession is better than tantric sex.
Just what the doctor ordered to get in the proper frame of mind for this weekend.

All kinds of Mack Adamsy awesome.

I jump in it.

Just took the revolver out of my pie-hole and stepped back inside off the ledge. Thank you, kind sir.

I miss Keith Jackson in his prime.

At least we will be spared Brent Musburger on Saturday (pun intended).

How could you forget rule #1 on making the football good?

Just take the last 10 seconds off of video #10, and this would be perfect! Overall, I give it 4.9 stars out of 5. Thanks for the post.

God Bless Vince Young.

This is awesome, I’m so pumped up! Screw all this despair; it’s time for some hope. It’s time to get pissed off.

“Only angry people win football games!”

Wow. Okam used to be skinny! (for a 300 lb guy)

The Ramonce catch.

The Jamaal Charles run.

The Billy Pittman catch before half.

Deja vu all over again.

Whoops. My bad, Yogi.

I was looking for just the Billy Pittman half time catch, WHICH IS GOING IN THE BOOK!

Did a quick scan and missed it up top.

I’ll leave it up because I CAN LAUGH AT MYSELF!!!!!!

History is good for us here in a couple of ways.

Whether or not it is justified, over-confidence is a constant issue with our program. Therefore, on the rare occasions when we are underdogs (+3 1/2), particularly following a humiliating loss, we can come out the way our opponents typically do against us: with a serious mad-on and play our best game. Tables turned—how many mo’fo’s can we lay out?

It is also true that we are in the dirt burglars’ heads in a big way. Always have been, always will be. They have been known to gag a bit against us and lose when they probably should win.

These and Coach Boom give us a shot if the offense doesn’t gift-wrap it for them.

It is good that you are in a football mood, scipio. I want to talk with you about football things.

I just watched them all, dutifully and observantly, and I AM OFFICIALLY FUCKING READY TO RUN THROUGH A GOTDAMN BRICK WALL LET’S DO THIS THING PEOPLE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It took awhile for obvious reasons (not naming the team that shall not be named henceforth), but the wookiee is ready to pull some sooner arms out of their sockets… or watch our DEs do so to landry jones. COME AND GET IT LAND THIEVES.

Why are we teaching the Iraqi children to Gig ’em?

Although those clips gave me major goosebumps, that was a cruel thing to do. You know Greg Davis & Co. will quickly create a stink that would make you think you’re in the petting zoo outside the Cotton Bowl.

Now I am getting stoked. I really do hate those fuckers.

Does ANYONE have footage of the Peavy hit that ended Marcus Duprees college career?

I was there and it sounded like a watermelon being dropped off a 10 story building.

Dear God thank you. I needed that. Fuck OU.

I used to never understand genocide, until I started attending Texas/OU. The Bomar-ized clip just made me throw my water bottle across the room and bask in the moment. .
   
I’ll be at the game Saturday and I’m already anticipating the inevitable unimaginative rubbing of shit in our faces about UCLA. It’s standard practice, and will probably be UCLA flags there and everything. Those backwards hill-less hillbillies are beyond amiable approach.

I’m perfecting a flat handed crotch chop that raises up into the double horns. I’ve got one that’s a reverse cross flat hand chop that raises only one hand into a single rotating hookem that I like to shove in someone’s face, but I’ll try to be respectful.

I’ve got 50 yard line tickets. I’m sitting right next to Sooners on the Texas side. Don’t think for a second I’m going to take any crap from these booger eaters while their red faces barely grunt out hoofed beast squeals of “Boomer Sooner”.

I am going to be that guy, the guy that in any other situation would make you embarrassed to be a Texas Fan. I’m going to be that guy that resembles David Hasslehoff trying to eat a hamburger on the floor with no shirt on. The difference is I’ll be eating a turkey leg while telling bovine featured oakies ruminations about Pete Gardere.

Sooner fans are terrible losers, but they are even worse winners. It’s time to be the worst fans we possibly can be.

I’m going to be that guy again, nothing can stop me. I’m in burnt orange, I’ve got a fistful of beer tickets, I’m doing a Texas Fight, and ready to tear up some candy apple red ass, and I’m bringing MAJOR FUCKING APPLEWHITE WITH ME!!!

LET’S DO THIS AND DO IT RIGHT! NOW GO GET YOUR HORNS UP!

He is a speedster!!

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