What the Hell Happened To Us

This is getting ahead of the cart since there is no indication what, if any, changes are going to be made, but who are the elite offensive coordinators out there that we might tap? I am assuming Gus Malzahn is in his last year of coordinator status and he, and not Boom, will be at the top of every SEC school-with-a-coaching-vacancy’s wish list. Even Georgia’s. Who else is desirable?

Almost anyone with a pulse would be an upgrade.

Its sad when the solution to our problems was/is so easy. Get the best coaches, get the best players. We have chosen to subjigate merit to other ideals.

subjigate? really? you must of not lookt it up.

Excellent job refudiating his choice of words

take your chai tea and literary pugnacity over to Spiderworks

Only monosyllabic responses from the crumb bums.

VictorY! Viva la Vince!

I apologize in advance for any typos, etc in this – had the idea and had to get it “on paper” quick as I could,

The Greg Davis School
of Offensive Football
(VERY Offensive Football)

Find a Stud Quarterback (SQ).

Sign him.

Give SQ The Greg Davis Playbook consisting of 175 Excellent Plays from 20th Century.

Train SQ in some of the Plays.

Put SQ in game.

Tell SQ “Call the play I send in, regardless of how inane or pointless it may seem. Your opponent will recognize the formation and be able to predict the play with approximately 87.49999% accuracy. Your job is to make something happen anyway.”

During game, keep opponents Defensive teams off balance by calling random plays totally disregarding time, score, personnel, field position, offensive formation, defensive alignment, the outcome(s) of previous play(s). or whether SQ or any other personnel have ever practiced the play,

For ultimate unpredictability during games, prepare random play list in advance. Use computer to generate random number from 1 to N, where N is highest page number in Playbook. If computer unavailable, write down digits from passing cars on street on way to work. Generate up to 100 Plays in either fashion, and in unlikely event SQ is able to execute more than 100 plays, simply start over, no one will notice. If unable to create Playlist due to constraints of time, or to indifference, always carry two dice. Begin by throwing one or two dice. Roll one or both dice that number of times, totaling the results to find the first play. Thereafter, throw both dice and skip that number of pages to find the next play, except: if you roll a double, skip backwards that number of plays/pages, or you roll SEVEN or if both dice roll off table, in which case, call the same play again. For added unpredictability, substitute D’n’D dice or count cricket chirps.

If SQ is able to execute properly, play him until he graduates, is injured, or transfers.
   or
If SQ is unable to execute properly, tell media “SQ didn’t execute what we asked and expected, but he has shown definite improvement” and continue to play SQ until he graduates, is injured, or transfers; or
   or
[EXTREME CASE] If all journos at pressers begin either laughing, slow clapping, or nodding in unison, return to the first step (in middle of season, choose SQ from roster based on legacy relationship).

Repeat approximately 12 times per year with each set of SQs, for 25 years.

Retire;
or
[BETTER CHOICE] Accept administrative job with minimum two assistants (one to pork, one to work).

Here you go:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhlJZdQDz5E&feature=related

How the hell do make videos shown up in posts?

I would have a few recommendations on a nice wine to go with that ribeye, but Shiner would do, and we never had that post about wine after that lovely post about scotch.

But remember folks, with Thanksgiving coming up, please follow these two rules:
1. If you are going to the game, drink as much whiskey as you can handle that allows you to remain standing’
2. Pinot Noir with turkey, always.

God, I remember this video so well. At one point, I think I had it memorized.

God, I remember this video so well. At one point, I think I had it memorized. Also, look how much healthier Mack looks.

One (1) title in 40 (forty) years is not a trend.

It’s an anomaly.

So VY was an anomaly, no way?! Yeah, sometimes I forget that whole 2 big 12 titles in 13 yrs ( and 2 in 27 yrs of coaching by Mack) and 1 national championship in 35+ yrs….thank god for VY cuz it would really be depressing around here right now….not just negative. oh, and f greg davis.

Let us know how the steakhouse is, I’d go just for the sports memorabilia…

the fact that he has charcuterie at his restaurant makes me love him even more

What the hell happened?

Small bore analysis: chronic issues with offensive coaching and S&C no longer covered by overall talent and specifically great QB play. Bigger picture: hubris, complacency, lack of accountability, denial.

Perhaps it takes a crash of these proportions to break through Mack’s denial. These last games are trivial. The real game comes with rebuilding offense and S&C coaching from the top down.

Thanks for the video. Enjoy your meal.

The expectation of winning lots of enchiladas borders on irrational exuberance if not outright certifiable insanity.

In the case of Texas’s assistant coaches, the big money really works against us. Davis makes $500k, even if wanted to go be a head coach, no one is going to give him much more than that, when you include pensions, etc… his compensation is close to $750k. Why would you leave unless you got $2M? Same deal for assistants, they are all so well paid, that is makes no sense to leave, especially considering how cushy the lifestyle is.

In the case of Texas’s assistant coaches, the big money really works against us. Davis makes $500k, even if wanted to go be a head coach, no one is going to give him much more than that, when you include pensions, etc… his compensation is close to $750k. Why would you leave unless you got $2M? Same deal for assistants, they are all so well paid, that is makes no sense to leave, especially considering how cushy the lifestyle is.

I’’m not entirely confident that the reason Greg Davis is still our offensive coordinator is due to other schools not being able to give him enough money.

We went to VY’s steakhouse last weekend. I don’t mind going to support Vince, but the food was not up to par.

Here is Meekrob’s review on the evening – http://www.yelp.com/biz/vince-young-steakhouse-austin#hrid:tFLp7PtGDBo54A5iH1lU8g

If Gary Darnell could get a head coaching job after his fine work at Texas, I’m sure Davis could find somebody willing to take him.

“One (1) title in 40 (forty) years is not a trend. It’s an anomaly"

It was smart of you to stop right at 40 and leave out the 3 championships in 63, 69 and 70. It makes your case look much stronger.

Nice piece the “WWL” did after spending the entire month leading up to the game anointing USC as the Greatest Team of All Time and explaining why Texas had absolutely no chance whatsoever. By the day of the game I wanted to firebomb the HQ in Bristol and every one of those ignorant douchebags along with it.

I popped in the DVD of that game last week, after the KState debacle. I probably watch it twice a year, just to relive the game, but in this instance, I was just trying and get the sour taste of this year’s team out of my mouth. Lordy, the football was good back then, wasn’t it?

Without bad football, we would never recognize good football.

Savor the bad – roll it around on your tongue and imagine hawking up a greasy, slimy, three-pound chunk of infected green phlegm, shot through with blood sacs and blinky-eyed creatures, and with a supreme effort sending it flying through the air to land on the exposed still beating heart of the cause of this evil, and watch as it oozes into the chest cavity, the creatures audibly gleeful as they begin to devour that beast.

Oookay. I feel better now. Thanks for playing.

Though, I will remind everyone that even then, our very first kickoff return was muffed and recovered by USC. But still, Vince Young was and always will be a god in my eyes.

Sorry, fumbled, not muffed.

Er, and punt return, not kickoff. Sorry! These comments don’t have an edit function.

Watching that video reminds me of what it was like to have a functional tight end.

Remember how before the season Scipio was posting youtube videos and getting us hyped up like a pregame huddle led by Ray Lewis?

Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

Yeah, now I feel like the dude Ray Lewis stabbed.