Why Texas Won't Play AM

“Say, um, do you need an intern? 12th graders can skip 6th period. Otherwise I’m gonna accept that job offer from Whataburger.”

"Say, um, do you need an intern? 12th graders can skip 6th period. Otherwise I’m gonna accept that job offer from Whataburger." – Cougar High

(fuggin fat fingers)

Aggie Bluto: “Over? It’s not over ‘til we say it’s over. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no! It’s not over ‘til we say it’s over. When the going gets tough… the tough get going?” So the aggies ran away.

Many Ags disagree with Bill Byrne and don’t want to play you anyway. I’m actually okay with the end of this historic, tradition-rich rivalry because I think it’s in our best long-term interests. There’s no hard feelings, at least on my part- I just think Texas refuses to accept an environment with truly fair competition. You guys have become very polished in defending your methods, but believing them is tantamount to saying the Red Sox are competitive most years through an “eye for free agent” talent rather than the $200 million they shell out annually for their roster.

Just remember though, your program- for all its history- repels big programs. The SEC rputs effort into building a strong conference bond and mutual respect, resulting in an unmatched brand in college football. Texas has always driven away other big programs- Nebraska and Colorado last year, A&M and Mizzou this year, and OU gave it serious thought.

So here’s to seeing you guys across the Cotton Bowl sidelines sometime in the next few years. You guys won the rivalry, although things evened up when we became a coed University and actually evened up since the implementation of scholarship limits. We have a decent chance of taking the last game in the series from you as well.

The OP was right, this is business and not personal. We intend to usurp you and take your spot as the preeminent sports school in Texas by playing in the prestigious SEC while you guys get the old SWC gang back together. It might not happen- but don’t think we don’t have a chance. We’ve done it before.

…where the good lord split you. Seriously, don’t. The SEC wants that ass tight and neat when it arrives to get raped and pillaged up and down the Southeast. Aggies say that there’s no way anybody can “know” that they’ll get prison molested in the SEC. Ok, then we’ll go with practically certain.

Congrats on your pursuit of irrelevance, you’re well on your way. Enjoy framing the UT/A&M rivalry in the aggies favor to generations of dilusional farmers to come. Keep your bull shit justifications for running away on Texags, cuz they’re all played out and getting old.

Stop by the Walmart in Baton Rouge and pick up an economy sized container of KY, little brother. You’re gonna need it.

Ok, aggy. You say we won’t accept “truly fair competition”. Then, at the end of your post, you say you’ve “done it before” in regards to “usurping and taking our spot as the preeminent sports school in Texas”. When have you ever done that using “fair competition”?

UH UH UH. Not so fast. Delete that sentence that has any reference to the years ’84-95. Yeah, you were highly ranked, and yeah, you beat us 10 out of 11 tries, but that was hardly “fair competition”, and you know it.

Yes, the series is basically even since the early 70s. But that basically just shows what a complete cluster fuck of a program you guys are, and just how more important the Texas/a$m rivalry is to you farmers than it is to us ’sips.

When was the last time your program finished the season ranked in the top 10 (without major sanctions)? When was the last time you finished the season ranked in the Top 5? Only once. EVER. Before the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor.

When was the last time you went to a BCS game? Once.

When was the last time you WON a BCS bowl game. Never.

When was the last time you won back-to-back bowl games (let alone BCS bowl games)? Say it with me: NEVER.

So, basically, Texas, as a program, has accomplished more since 1998 as a program than you guys have accomplished in your entire HISTORY. This all despite the fact that you have matched us head-to-head for the last 40 years.

You guys are happy with the SEC move. We are THRILLED. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Dear “We’ll call you”,

Please don’t. Just hang up the phone and keep shooting yourselves in the foot. A&M will always be losers because “you can’t fix stupid”.

veggiehorn -

You’re being too hard on the aggies. Don’t forget that A&M won the galleryfurniture.com bowl in 2001.

Give them credit.

Look, bottom line is that A&M leaving really has little/no affect on Texas. The only real card in play here is you guys. Sure there’s a chance that things come up roses all around, your wildest dreams come true and you guys join the ranks of the nationally elite. But let’s be honest, it’s a small chance. I would argue that your odds of that happening were probably better in the Big 12. And there’s a very real and significantly greater chance it doesn’t play out that way. Unfortunately, you guys will have gone all in at that point and there are no do-overs, at least not for "the next 100 years" right?

Texas is going to be just fine either way. Why? Because at the end of the day we are still The University of Texas, arguably the most recognizable brand in all of college sports, located in a very attractive city in the center of one of the top recruiting areas in the country, with the alumni and business acumen that always have and always will support excellence, both financially and culturally. Look, we make no apologies for who we are and we’re sorry if that pisses you off. Life just isn’t fair but there’s nothing anyone can do about it.

And sure, the conference was stronger with you in it. But conference strength isn’t what really matters to us in the long run – winning does. And herein lies the key difference between a Texas and an A&M. This is part of (although not the only) reason we stayed in the Big 12 and want it to survive – our goal every year is to win the national championship. Sure this doesn’t happen every season, but we can most easily and regularly accomplish this primary objective by being in the Big 12. Any other league and the calculus to the BCS Championship Game gets that much harder. That’s part of the reason we aren’t going to keep playing you guys. Scheduling A&M doesn’t really help us achieve our goal of playing for the MNC. Playing A&M was important but not as important as playing for a national title. A&M on the other hand doesn’t think like that. You guys are willing to run willy-nilly off the cliff just to prove that you can get out of Texas’ shadow in the slim hope that it all works out like you’ve dreamed. That’s fine and that’s your choice. But that’s bad football planning. That’s bad business. But in College Station, more often than not, that seems to be par for the course. It happens when you make decisions on emotion and not rational, well thought out logic.

UTIceberg -

Bowtie Loftin and his magic eight ball would disagree with you.

Maroon Carrots,

That’s fine, Bowtie can disagree all he wants. Pretty much the rest of the college football world would agree with me. Hell, most of the SEC probably agrees with me.

The only reason the SEC will take A&M in the first place is the inroads to Texas recruiting it will open. A&M offers them nothing else. That’s how they buy their way into the conference.

Aggie: “Here Mr. Sec. Just like I promised. Here’s all the keys and codes and passwords.”
Mr. Sec: “Thanks, kid. You did real good. Now stay out of the way and don’t bother me.”
Aggie: “Mr. Sec, you said I could BE somebody now, remember?”
Mr. Sec: “Hmmm? Did I say that? You ARE somebody, boy. You’re the somebody that’s gonna get me a cup of coffee. Then after that, get out of the way. I have a meeting with the Big Boys. You know them, right? Alabama, Tennessee, Florida, Auburn, LSU, Georgia? I don’t want you bothering them until they call for you. When they do, be sure to pretty yourself up a little. I’ll tell you what. Go see Mr. Vanderbilt. He can give you some pointers on how to present yourself when they want you.”
Aggie: “Mr. Vanderbilt? Mr. Sec sent me to you for advice.”
Mr. Vanderbilt: "The new bitch, huh? I can see you’ve been somebody’s bitch before, but this is a whole ‘nother ball game, boy. First thing we’ve got to do with you is some relaxation techniques, ‘cause, take it from me, if you don’t relax, it’ll hurt. Does the term “Sabanized” mean anything to you?"

from The Story of A, or The Sheepfucker’s Education

All the UT fan comments here are great. Lurker hit it right on the head when he said the SEC is using Aggy to get more into Texas for recruiting.
Just like Jerry Jones and Arkansas used them already to set up a game in Arlington so that Arkansas could have an increased presence in this state for recruiting purposes.
Arkansas knows it can’t win without more Texas kids on it’s roster.

Dumbasses will never admit they are being used and prefer to blame UT for all their problems.

Please not only don’t call us but lose our number while you are at it.

And, the biggest lie of all is when one of them says it’s business only and not personal, It’s definitely personal.

All of you predictors, with such surety, really don’t know what the future holds for UT and aggsy. UT will probably be fine, but A&M may be fine too. That is a real possibility.

Sure Abdominal is a possibility but probably not much more real than the fact that the SI swimsuit models are lubing up for me and carrying the giant check in my name from the Publisher’s Clearinghouse.

What continues to amaze me is how many Aggies post on this site? Does the UT jealousy run so deep that Ags have to surf the web looking for websites that might be saying something bad about them? I could give a ray’s ass about anything Aggie related and would rather post on a pottery forum than an Aggie forum. I know they make great fodder for discussion but do they think anyone on this site is going to say “ya know, I think he’s right!”. Keep drinking the Kool-Aid Ags!

VaHorn – I am an Aggie and I read (and occasionally post) here because I find the articles interesting and generally a step above what you find on Rivals. I also think that the readers who leave comments are , as a whole, more rational than just about anywhere else. Accordingly, I read/post here. I don’t understand why that would amaze you.

As to continuing to play the A&M/UT game, I am really sad to see it go. Every single one of you has an Aggie sibling/parent/friend/spouse/coworker that you genuinely like and that you enjoy having a rivalry with. My wife and her entire family are horns. Several of my very good friends are horns. I look forward to Thanksgiving because even if the game has little signifcance in terms of conference standing or bowl implications, it nevertheless has great significance at the Thanksgiving dinner table. I will really miss that.

Uhhh… We’ll Call You & Maroon Carrots!

“There’s no hard feelings, at least on my part- I just think Texas refuses to accept an environment with truly fair competition.”

Can either of you tell me what you mean here? Sounds like both of you went to the ATM, and from the inside looking out, I think you fucktards are the only ones who can…

Really… please don’t call us and lose our freaking number!

BTW, I listen to several local sports talk shows as well as the occasional flip to Finebaum. Here’s the deal. The SEC is just using Aggy for a perceived recruiting and television inroad into to Texas. It may or may not have a huge effect on The University.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the disappointment in the voices of SEC fans when discussing Aggy’s arrival to the SEC. Multiple times I’ve actually heard fans say something along the lines of “I wish it was Texas” or “Why couldn’t we get a real team?”. Now this is the general unfiltered sentiment of unbiased SEC fans. Basically, Aggy is a joke EVEN before the majority of SEC fans even see the “traditions”, jizz jars, milkmen, etc…

“Bowtie Loftin and his magic eight ball would disagree with you.”

marron carrots… are you serious?? That really is funny stuff because UTIceberg’s comments were in the cross-hairs!

I have to agree with Andrew the Aggie’s take on losing the game. It is always a huge deal for family and friends to exchange some ribbing each way every Thanksgiving. We like to give Aggy crap about the lack of “water cooler” appeal when they play SEC teams, but I feel like we are going to be in the same situation on Thanksgiving going forward, no matter who we play. I’m not surprised given how everything has shaken out, it just seems like a big middle finger to the fans from the people calling the shots at both schools.

It just hit me. I can’t believe it took me this long to figure it out. It’s been right there staring us in the face all this time and none of us has seen it for what it is. A&M is DWIGHT SCHRUTE!

I realize the article involves Baylor and women’s basketball, but it also goes back to one basic point and that is the feeling the Ags left the conference on their free will and with that severed ties with the schools in the state.

http://www.chron.com/sports/college-basketball-women/article/Baylor-s-Mulkey-sees-end-to-rivalry-with-A-M-2227310.php

A&M is DWIGHT SCHRUTE!

Fuck that. A&M is Mose.

One thing is clear as crystal: college realignment is business for everyone except the Ags, who are taking pretty much everything personal.

There is one problem the ags haven’t even contemplated that could crush their program. What is the “superconference” model isn’t the best way to go for college football programs? There is a strong possibility that at least two teams plus Boise could be undefeated at the end of the season. And the BCS could end up a clusterfuck yet again. What if changes in the system require a playoff and to get into the playoff, one needs to win their conference? If this happens, a 10 member conference is highly preferred over a 14 or 16 member conference. Just be patient. If a playoff system causes additional realignment, aggie could be seriously screwed.

“I’m not surprised given how everything has shaken out, it just seems like a big middle finger to the fans from the people calling the shots at both schools.”

This is like telling the guy with the knife in his back to suck it up and shake hands with his assailant. I don’t understand why Texas is under any obligation to a subset of our fans to keep playing A&M. I don’t want to ever play them again. I have been pleased that we have never scheduled SMU post-SWC breakup and I hope we continue that tradition. A&M probably deserved the same penalties back then but ‘fair play’ is only for non-Aggies and they used their clout to get a slap on the wrist. I don’t want to play them not only for this latest round of whining on their part, but I feel like it is time to punish them for their cheating that never got the level of punishment that it deserved. (Yes, OU never gets their just desserts for cheating, but they are Okies and they did most of their cheating in the Big 8, so Nebraska, Colorado, and Missouri can do the running from OU’s cheating past and not play the Sooners again.)

I got my undergrad at UT and went to grad school at A&M (it was either College Station or Stillwater, OK – and we all know the entire state of OK sucks, which keeps Texas from sliding into the Gulf).

I tried explaining to Aggies that while we think about the upcoming game against the Aggies at the start of football season and want to beat them, we’re really obsessed about beating OU year round.

Their response?

“That’s bullcrap! You’re just saying that because we’ve been kicking your ass! Whoop!”
(Jackie Sherrill era)

Whatever.

Jc25,

I never thought Mose had a delusional sense of self-importance, but sure, I’ll go with it.

Arkansas was a much larger rival than ATM ever could have been. Nationally competitive, and a nationally significant game most of the time. Some classic matchups. We got over that one.

For people who profess being very excited about leaving the Big 12 behind, they sure seem bitter about leaving it behind.

Psycho ex-girlfriend but ugly and fat.

We’ll Call You displays the typical irony-deafness of the red ass Ag. His whole post is exactly what SRR refers to in his clever scenario. At one time this type of Ag can vilify Texas, sniff and then say “no hard feelings.”

This type of Aggie is accustomed to holding two different versions of truth in his head at the same time: “We’re the most honorable. We have a code!” & “We cheated, but everybody was cheating!”

Had A&M operated with more respect to Texas and the conference, my guess is that the game would continue. Had they done so, I would have been actively for keeping the game. Now, I’m inclined to tell them to fuck off. Find a new focus for your “burning desires.” You can’t, but try.

Aggy is Fredo

I say play em and beat em, why not?

We just need to beat them like (collies) dogs this T’giving. We had one rise-up game during 5-7 against the CornShuckers…let’s have one like that this year at aggy. We’re sending them off anyway. Might as well send them off butt-hurt.

Outsider’s view here. Sorry Ags, but UT is the school of choice nationwide. TAMU is a wonderful institution, conservative and unabashedly patriotic, and I’m glad it’s there along with the service acadamies extolling duty, honor, and country. It’s also quite clannish and provincial, and its traditions are interesting if a little weird to the outsider. I like cute cheerleaders much more than crew-cut guys in milkmen’s garb, but that’s just me. I will say the yell leaders do their jobs with the utmost conviction. The C of C band is badass, and the Aggie War Hymn is stirring, even to one with no connection to the school.

I don’t think the SEC is a good fit for you guys, sorry to say. The conservative nature of your school just doesn’t jive with freewheeling vibe of places like Ole Miss, LSU, and Bama. In order to be successful there, you’re going to have to win the recruiting battle with UT for the state’s top players, and I just don’t see that happening. Players from out of state may not understand the Aggie traditions, and I don’t see you getting players from LA, AL and FL to come to CS instead of their in-state schools.

I say play em and beat em, why not?

I say don’t play ‘em and it’s the same as beating ’em, why?

“Aggy is Fredo.”

If you ask them, they’re Frodo.

Delusional retardation of reality is what enables those people to fixate on this being a “Texas Longhorn Problem.” It’s not. We know it. It has nothing to do with the University of Texas. You people made your bed. Go lie in it.

Reminds me of an ex-girlfriend threatening to leave. Go already. You’re wasting my time.

And, whomever defamed Mose Harper (above), your apology is hereby accepted.

Last time a&m won a game in Dallas, 1988.
Last time a&m won a game against a SEC team, 1994.
Last time a&m won a bowl game, 2001.
Last time a&m beat UT in recruiting without paying the recruit, never!

"Eskimohorn said:

October 20th, 2011 at 6:59 am

Aggy is Fredo"

October 20th, 2011 at 9:18 am
The name maroon carrots refers to a research project carried out by aggies about 10 years ago. The ags spent millions of dollars creating a maroon carrot so that aggies wouldn’t have to eat orange carrots."

Not much of an accomplishment considering the original carrots were purple.
http://www.carrotmuseum.co.uk/maroon.html

Don’t forget Maroon Bluebonnets.

stevo67 said:

October 20th, 2011 at 9:48 am

- maroon carrots -

I almost forgot about that project. A&M is an excellent research university (and I sincerely hope they continue in that tradition), but that was not an Einstein moment on their part. Made as much sense as "Freedom" fries.

Actually they are healthier. They contain more carotenoids and other good stuff.

http://doccarnahan.blogspot.com/2011/01/purple-carrots.html

Josef Goebbels was an amoral, evil person, but he had a great understanding of human nature and the science of persusion. He stated: "If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it."

This is what ATM and its supporters have in an effort to rationalize ATM’s deceitful and greedy treatment of its Big 12 brethern, particularly since a year ago when it contractually and publicly committed to the Big 12 as a means of extracting a disproportionate share of the break up fees to be paid by CU and NU.

The dissembling and hypocrisy of ATM is incredible. The undisputed facts are:

1. ATM’s greatest successes on the football field occurred during a period of blatant lying, cheating and corruption. Is that the fair competitive environment our ATM friends claims UT denies? No. UT did not force ATM to engage in systemic corruptions from its board of regents down to the assistant coaches.

2. UT suggested that the Big 12 form a network and its suggestion was rejected by the Big 12, including ATM.

3. UT suggested to ATM that the two schools form a network, but ATM rejected the offer. UT did not force ATM’s hand.

4. ATM was secretly negotiating with the SEC while proclaiming loyalty to the Big 12. UT had no hand it ATM’s duplicity.

5. UT did not drive NU from the Big 12, unless one considers its football dominance over NU. NU left for a variety of reasons, including the right to share in the Big 10 network revenues. Remember, NU was one of the members of the Big 12 which rejected the Big 12 network and which, like ATM, voted for UNEQUAL revenue sharing based on television appearances. UT did not make those decisions for NU.

6. CU left because by its own ineptitude, none of which was attributable to UT, its athletic department and programs were in shambles and destitute. CU left for the MONEY, not because UT drove them out.

7. Missouri has been toying with the idea of the Big 10 or SEC for decades. UT had nothing to do with that. A year ago, Missouri publicly stated its desire to leave the Big 12 for the Big 10, but was rejected. It was Missouri’s action which triggered the specter of instability which encouraged CU and NU to consider leaving. UT had nothing to do with Missouri’s decision a year ago.

From the highest reaches of ATM’s administration to the fans who recite falsehoods to rationalize ATM’s deceit, ATM’s representatives have demonstrated that they are liars and are too cowardly to take responsibility for the consequences of their decisions.

If ATM had any of the “honor” it claims as its heritage, its representatives would simply tell the truth: “We are leaving because we can make more money by being a member of the SEC and we do not care about our past promises to our fellow members of the Big 12 or the effect of our departure on them financially or otherwise.” Instead, ATM, like a small child when called to account, blames others for its actions.

“Though the rivalry has included some transcendent moments (the ’99 Bonfire collapse when both schools put aside the hard feelings to assuage the grief was an event that united all of us, Longhorn and Aggie alike), uglier memories like "Cart McCoy" have come to replace them. Lately, the rivalry has become an unadulterated A&M hatefest of all things UT, and how UT is keeping A&M down, and its all so unfair, and I am so tired of listening to it.”

What I took away from the Bonfire Game after attending it was the attitude of most of the aggy that I saw that day who acted as if Texas had knocked the damn thing over and beating Texas that day was our comeuppance.

That was the day that I truely began to hate ALL things AGGY. Screw them and good riddance. I hope we never play them again.

It is always best to burn your bridges. That way you will never be tempted to cross them again.

bbliss -

"Because for the foreseeable future, it will hurt our strength of schedule."

Please note I said “net benefit” which includes SOS in decision making.

…and it’s goodbye to the University of Louisana at College Station.

“What I took away from the Bonfire Game after attending it was the attitude of most of the aggy that I saw that day who acted as if Texas had knocked the damn thing over and beating Texas that day was our comeuppance.”

Didn’t attend the game that year, sorry to hear about your experience. Most of my Aggie friends and relatives were very appreciative of the support from UT and the Austin community. IIRC the blood banks were turning people away due to so many coming in to donate for the injured students. I remember the Longhorn band exiting the field with hats off, and the Aggie band marching off in silence through our players lined up in the end zone. Our guys were on one knee as a sign of respect, that’s when I thought we were probably going to lose the game. Of all the losses that year, that was the one I was OK with, and to be honest, if we had won, I doubt i would have cherished that victory.

But that’s all changed… I hope we send them off Nebraska style this time.

The SEC puts effort into building a strong conference bond and mutual respect, resulting in an unmatched brand in college football. Texas has always driven away other big programs- Nebraska and Colorado last year, A&M and Mizzou this year, and OU gave it serious thought.

If Texas had said yes, the SEC would have taken them in a heartbeat. Still would.

“Actually they are healthier. They contain more carotenoids and other good stuff.”

Good to know that they’re healthier.Still not sure about the purplish/maroon color, though.

“Yeah, the Schrute comparison falls apart once you realize he has quite a bit of success actually doing his job.

Fredo seems much more apt. Especially when you consider how much he tried to fuck over Michael while still appearing to be a loyal if disgruntled member of the family."

I can’t believe I have to defend my Dwight Schrute analogy. This board is getting tough. There’s no perfect analogy, and I will agree that the Fredo analogy is indeed a good one.

Here’s how the Dwighy Schrute analogy works:

Delusions of importance:
Dwight Deputy Sherrif, Assistant to the Regional Manager vs Assistant Regional Manager
A&M- Valuable to the SEC in and of themselves, will be able to compete in SEC

Eccentricities:
Dwight- Obssession with bears, ties of various shades of yellow, general social awkwardness
A&M- male cheerleaders, ball grabbing

Ironic machismo:
Dwight: martial arts obssession, chinese stars in his desk, defender of the office mentality
A&M: paramilitary band, pulled sabre on SMU cheerleader

Leaving good situation for “greener pastures”:
Dwight- Left Dunderl Mifflin for brief stent at Staples
A&M- leaving Big 12 for SEC

Home/History:
Dwight: Lives on a beet farm
A&M: Agricultural university in a small town

There’s more, but I must get back to work.

… We’ll Call You: “There’s no hard feelings, at least on my part- I just think Texas refuses to accept an environment with truly fair competition.”

“Truly fair competition” as defined by Aggy seems to be that Aggy gets what Aggy wants, regardless of whether or not it’s been earned. This is true regardless of whether that earning means on the field of play, financial resources dedicated to Athletics, coaches’ compensation, brand recognition, or any other measurable statitstic.

Look, I’m a UT fan, so I understand a sense of entitlement. But you guys place a value on yourselves so much higher than any rational fact-based argument can justify. Your football program has been stuck between mediocre to slightly-above-average for decades, including the entire life of the Big XII. And don’t talk about Sears’ Cups or non-revenue sports, it doesn’t help your case. You’re only spending averages of $16 Mil on your program, far below what higher achieving programs are spending. This is why you get stuck with guys like Sherman, who while good, probably can’t take you as far as you want to go. Your traditions are strange, even frightening to most normal people, thus confining you in your pursuit of the best talent.

So what exactly would you call “fair” competition with UT? What would it have to look like?

I’m happy that I will NEVER have to watch an A&M game on Thanksgiving after this year. That is something to be truly thankful for.

For a stint I worked in construction as a laborer. Not a huge project, but it was under-manned. This led to one of the older helpers assisting me in digging a trench (for plumbing I believe, though it’s not really important).

The trench was the length of the house (50-60 ft-ish) and continued around the side of the house (adding another 20-30 ft or so. The foreman made it clear he wanted it done in two days. Which is why he gave me “help”. My thought at the time? What is a 50 year old man going to help with?

Apparently digging, as he grabbed a pick and handed me one. Almost immediately he noticed the hurried pace at which I was working and told me to slow down. This confused me as the foreman was chewing our asses about it. He told me I would never be able to help him finish if I continued at that pace, and that he would end up having to do most of it himself.

I remember laughing wholeheartedly at him. Straight to his face (obnoxiously, even). He chuckled a bit (he knew what was actually in store), took no offense and continued to try and get me to pace myself…which only made me work harder and faster. Meanwhile, behind me, I hear a steady drone of dink……….dink……….a 3-5 seconds at least would pass before he would strike again, while I was dropping my pick upward of once every two seconds.

Stopping for lunch, I looking up, and I had a good 20 feet on him (mind you the ditch dimensions were something like 3’ deep and 2’ wide). I was hauling ass. I made sure to point this out as we went to lunch.

This time the old man laughed wholeheartedly at me…..to my face. He told me I wouldn’t make it til 4, let alone show up the next day in any sort of effective shape.

Again, I shrugged advice. While a bit slower, I started again after lunch, still double-timing the geezer.

2 ’o clock: I notice that I am no longer swinging quicker than the old man, in fact, he is now swinging faster than me (though still in accordance with his starting pace).

2:30: The old man looks up at me, laughs diabolically, and says, “how ya feeling sonny?” At this point I am able only to lift the pick. Any damage was done by gravity. I start to hate the old man.

3:00: After taking multiple breaks in the last 30 minutes I realize I have effectively moved maybe 3". I can no longer lift the pick over my head. Shoulder-height is about max.

3:30: I AM DYINGGGGGGGGG. I now LOATHE the old man, who by the way, has been laughing on and off for about 20 minutes. The old man is within feet of me.

4:00: YES!!! I MADE IT!!! I AM BEAST!!! Take that old man. looks at old man’s ditch MOTHERF$@$*%!!!!! He beat me by at least 10 feet. Just for that day.

I did not return the next day. Or rather, I did, but only long enough for the foreman to take one look at me and tell me he’s not paying me for any work I did, and that I might as well leave….as at this point I was costing him money…and producing nearly nothing.

If you hadn’t figured it out yet: UT is the old man. ATM is me.

So ag-trolls…while you are eating your lunch and boasting about how great you are (or are going to be), and you notice people laughing for no discernible (to you) reason (see: the rest of this board)….remember this story.

Have fun tomorrow.

Apologize for the string of sloppy parenthesis at the end. Should read:

and you notice people laughing (see: the rest of this board) for no discernible (to you) reason ….remember this story.
Also,
Stopping for lunch, I looking up, and I had a good 20 feet on…
Should be:
Stopping for lunch, I looked up, and had a good 20 feet on…

BoJ, I was just being facetious. I think the Dwight Schrute analogy is awesome.

Although I do imagine A&M lining up a bunch of borrowed cars side by side, contemplating the Knievel jump, then deciding to just run across and claim success.

elkabong – Got a good laugh out of your analogy-mainly because I just finished excavating a portion of earth on my property for a retaining wall – I was an dirt moving mofo till bout 3-4 in the afternoon……..and pretty much worthless the next day.

Yeah, unless you do it EVERY day, it is a damn struggle the day after. At the time I was 18, in shape, and had been stacking scaffolding for a few weeks prior (if this doesn’t sound hard…picture yourself climbing 3 stories up with a 6×8 80lb piece of metal hanging from your shoulder) and I still was wiped. Can’t even imagine the level of sucktitude I would endure now.

I just thought about it, and scaffolding setup could be equated to big 12 play. And ditch digging to SEC play. Though both are very difficult, being in shape to do one doesn’t really transfer over to the other.

slaps self Sorry. I’ll stop.

I need to edit more carefully before I hit send. Used to the edit feature.

being in shape to do one doesn’t neccesarily transfer over to the other.

Yeah, I’m going to go get coffee. I’m gonna pretend I didn’t just mis-spell a word in a post editing my previous post.

looks around like a cat that fell flat on his ass

Nothing to see here.

E1kabong,

Kinda like the old joke

Young bull to old bull overlooking a heard of heifers, lets run down there and screw one of those heifers.

Old bull to young bull: Na lets walk down and screw em all.

I really hope Texas beats the aggies in November, but unfortunately they will be favored to win, especially playing at home. If that happens, then they will get to brag the last victory. That is what I’m thinking will happen. Where as, if we play them the following years, then we will have the upper hand and can beat them a few years straight.

jc25,

That wasn’t directed at you. That was for CrazyJoeDavola, who said the Dwight Schrute analogy “falls apart…” But, thanks.

^^ Wait a second, now I see why you were saying you were being facetious and it wasn’t about my superfluous post justifying my analogy. You suggested Mose facetiously. Now I must ask, when did the failed borrowed car Evil Knievel jump thing happen?

BOJ, don’t get me wrong – I think Schrute is fine as an analogy, as you detail in your rebuttal.

I just can’t get past the fact that a least some of Schrute’s braggadocio is not in the least bit false.

Then again, Dwight’s success isn’t nationwide but instead regional, and when you get down to it, no one outside of Scranton/Wilkes-Barre (i.e., Bryan/College-Station) really gives a shit … so maybe I need to recalibrate.

CrazyJoe,

Haha. That was full circle. Loved it. I wasn’t ever really offended or mad about your comment. I was sort of giving shit back but my full plate of work today didn’t give me time to develop the sense of sarcasm/two dudes heckling each other for fun vibe in my posts.

I wonder if you can analogize Jim to Tech. You know usually aloof, but good when they put their mind to it. Pranks Dwight/A&M out of exasperation. I’m just spitballing here.

LOL! That’s right! How could I forget about the “maroon” bluebonnets? The maroon bluebonnets that are actually PINK? Aggies… the potential punchline to ANY JOKE.

1111, The original impetus for doing any of the tweaking with the Bluebonnets was for the Texas Sesquicentenial. The wanted to plant a stand of wildflowers, preferably Bluebonnets in the fashion of the state flag. We already have Blue bluebonnets, obviously. White is easy, you just breed the color OUT. Red on the other hand was a little more problematic. The color has to already exist within the flower to enhance it through breeding, as I understand it. Well, who better to go to than the Ags. The wild strain that they used for the red were pink. They were discovered just outside of San Antonio in an area that was set to be paved over.
When they began growing the pink Bluebonnets in hopes a few would be more red they discovered pink bluebonnets in their stand that had a blue tinge to them. Some aggie realized this looked kind of maroon so the aggies co-opted the project to their own end and did what they do…make shit maroon. Here’s a quote from the Aggie horticultural website (an excellent website if you like growing things) : Greg Grant, being an Aggie, thought to himself, “These pink bluebonnets with the blue tinge in them look a bit like the color maroon. Let’s select out, not for the color red, but for the color maroon. Who cares about the Texas flag. It’s Aggies that matter.” That quote encapsulates Aggies mindset, they are Aggies first and Texans second.

IF Nebraska or Colorado or Missouri would have successfully competed for championships with OU or Texas even only a respectable amount of the time the last 12 years they would still be here …..end of story. The revenue discrepancies were always small and meaningless historically as it applied to them.

These guys left because they couldn’t compete for championships here consistently and they were afraid Texas and/or Oklahoma would leave them in the cold. That’s it end of storry…..Any other stated reasons are BS and provide cover only. Unequal revenue sharing, Longhorn Netwwork, or Texas ’ disproportionate influence are just convenient excuses and anyone close to the situatioon knows this. A& M just like those schools is running away from Texas and OU football dominance, but they are running into a fire, they will have to adapt quickly and cheat to compete over there…..good luck.

Nothing changes in College Station. tAMU has a history of bad decisions and this one is the capper.

Pooooooooooooooooooooor aggies!

I couldn’t have said it better – well played, Iowa State

http://www.widerightnattylite.com/2011/10/17/2496477/goodbye-to-texas-a-m-university-a-study-in-dishonesty-hypocrisy-and#80671339

Snide Aside said:

October 20th, 2011 at 3:54 pm

I couldn’t have said it better – well played, Iowa State

http://www.widerightnattylite.com/2011/10/17/2496477/goodbye-to-texas-a-m-university-a-study-in-dishonesty-hypocrisy-and#80671339

The read would’ve been a better one if it hadn’t went into the “UT is to blame” B.S.

paleohorn,
I think Nebraska may be the only one who left because they felt they couldn’t compete. In the Big 10 they might have a better chance to compete by going back to partial qualifiers, but I also think culturally they think they can have an easier time recruiting Big 10 type players rather than Big 12 type players. But the others are leaving for different reasons.

Colorado left because the Pac 10 was just a better deal, I bet if Baylor never pushed to join the Pac instead of them they might very well have stayed put in the Big 12 when the deal died. Missouri doesn’t seem to care about winning, so why not go and take more money to be even more of an also ran, since they don’t even have a weak division to try and win anymore. A&M already thinks they are great and that the Big 12 sucks competitively. Their expectations seem to be that they will win immediately in the SEC.

What a crock of shit analogy. Bill powers and Deloss spent most of 2009 and 2010 going behind everyones back and work out a deal for themselves, then spring their plans on A&M and others with no cooperation until they had assured their own favorable terms. And then just expected everyone else to go along. This applies to every step of the saga, PAC 10 part 1 and 2, as well as big 12 chapters 2 and 3. And the Lhn bullshit, lying about the contents during the summer meetings.

You really expect A&M or anyone else to just let someone else keep lying and using leverage to dictate A&M’s destiny? Baylor and Tech do it because they have no other options.

Fuckoff u back stabbing, lying, self righteous Texas administration. Good luck finding any other decent schools to partner with you.

Well, sure, why not? A&M lied to the rest of the conference about its recommitment in June of 2010.

You dumb fucking aggy – no wonder the whole country has laughed at you for so many years -because of twerps just like you. ESPN sets the programming not Texas, you ignorant gomer – Good luck in the SEC, loser – you will be as relevent as Tulane is in Louisiana.

A&M hoops assistant says they already have altered recruiting strategy b/c of SEC move.

Glynn Cyprien, A&M’s associate head coach, said the school’s move to the SEC on July 1 has "been held against us" in recruiting by other schools and has altered the Aggies’ recruiting strategy. Although A&M still seeks "to get a strong hold on Texas" in its recruiting efforts, there will be a heightened focus on other states because of the SEC move.

"It used to be that high school kids, coaches and parents could go see away games … when we go play at Baylor or over in Austin," Cyprien said. "But now, it’s different. The closest conference game after this year will probably be down in Baton Rouge (against LSU). That’s been held against us in terms of recruiting. So we’ve got to change and we’ve got to go down to the Southern states … where we’re going to play and try and use that as a positive."

http://sportsblogs.star-telegram.com/colleges/2011/10/texas-mens-basketball-coach-rick-barnes-said-today-he-has-no-plans-to-continue-the-longhorns-series-with-texas-am-on-a.html

Ultra, this!

I think the University of Louisana – College Station and the SEC really misread the possibilities of what might happen from this move. Both entities thought it would be a huge recruiting boon of talented Texas kids for their program and their conference, respectively (not respectfully).

They missed the point…MOMMAs will trump conference-affiliation every time when it comes to where a kid plays college ball. ULCS…Tech, TCU, and Baylor thank you VERY much!

Henceforth I will never again refer to the Aggies as TEXAS A&M. They don’t deserve that honor. They shall forever be ULCS…the University of Louisana – College Station.

I like the ULCS moniker…I think the Aggies might just take to it as well. They would be the BEST academic directional school in the country! Moral victory! Whoop!

Better still = tAMU and/or AtM. They don’t deserve to have the T capitalized – they abandoned the state of Texas!

I’m using a&m in lower case. They don’t deserve capital letters.

I have read what seems like hundreds of articles on this subject and this is the best, funniest, and most truthful version yet.
…and that’s coming from an aggie fan.