A fool and his money are soon elected.
Let's hope so.
As avid readers of Barking Carnival know, there is a strict NO POLITICS policy. This discussion of a politics leads a to a divisiveness and lack of intelligent discourse not seen since the great Simms / Applewhite arguments of yesteryear. This policy has served us well.
Until now.
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DEMOCRACY -1, ME +BILLION. RT @gromerjeffers: Craig James will file in Texas for the Republican U.S. Senate primary by end of day Thursday
We echo Spencer. We will actively fund raise for Craig James to get him off our college football games help him be elected to the Senate.
FIRE ELECT CRAIG JAMES!
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yes, because its MUCH better to have a(nother) corrupt, mentally deficient, self-important asshole in a powerful position in our national government than to have to deal with his inane mumblings during college football games.
/moves to canada
//realizes its cold as shit and moves back, but is still frustrated that craig james remains relevant
by dlonghorns on Dec 13, 2011 1:21 PM CST reply actions
He will still peddle his drivel when ESPN calls him up for a periodic Q&A.
by Gate_of_Horn on Dec 13, 2011 1:23 PM CST reply actions
His campaign trail in Lubbock and Amarillo should provide some comic value.
If he wins the primaries, West Texas will be put in a terrible bind. Vote for Craig James… or vote Democrat…
by PVogel on Dec 13, 2011 1:34 PM CST reply actions
If Craig James could be bought so cheaply to play football, I wonder what his price would be elsewhere for more important tasks.
by rawaustin on Dec 13, 2011 1:35 PM CST reply actions
Who does James think will like him? He seems pretty unpopular in West Texas and I would assume that both of SMU’s fans would be reluctant to support the guy who destroyed the football team.
On the other hand, I’d totally vote for Mike Leach. He’d raise revenues by issuing Letters of Marque and his healthcare plan would effectively treat the masses at for little money (though the up-front cost of building all of the electrical closets could be steep).
by LongCat on Dec 13, 2011 1:37 PM CST reply actions
I wonder how Craig James will respond to the allegations that he killed 5 hookers while at SMU? Has he ever addressed the rumors that he killed 5 hookers?
by Filmore Slim on Dec 13, 2011 1:41 PM CST reply actions
James will be lucky to top 3rd place in the primary. Cruz has worked to develop an actual constituency (Tea Party) while Dewhurst, bland as he is, has his hundreds of millions and a huge leads in the polls.
Will be interesting to see if ESPN takes him back after this ends in a debacle. Lynn Swann hasn’t been back in broadcasting since his electoral run in ’06 and James will have to run a much more ugly and controversial campaign than anything Swanny did.
by chairman on Dec 13, 2011 1:44 PM CST reply actions
I don’t know about the hookers, but I did hear talk back in the day that there was more to the whole “backfield in motion” than just football. It may be true that Eric and Craig knew each other in the biblical sense. Then again, I couldn’t bring myself to vote for James if he ran against the Nixon/Agnew ticket.
by SaltWaterCroc on Dec 13, 2011 1:45 PM CST reply actions
There was already polling out months ago which showed had screwed James is. Obviously he didn’t listen: http://www.texasmonthly.com/blogs/burkablog/?p=9486
by chairman on Dec 13, 2011 1:45 PM CST reply actions
Yeah, that dead hooker thing is going to be a problem.
by CrazyJoeDavola on Dec 13, 2011 1:47 PM CST reply actions
Herman Cain signs off his conquests via much needed financial assistance, Derek Jeter sends ’em off with autographed memorabilia, Craig James has them shuffled off this mortal coil.
Sounds about right.
by jc25 on Dec 13, 2011 1:48 PM CST reply actions
I’d label it the Peter Principle, except that CJames has already reached the level of his incompetence.
Not that he has a prayer of getting elected, but CJames would hate being a freshman senator with all of the irrelevance and condescension appertaining thereto.
by Dmitri Kissov on Dec 13, 2011 1:52 PM CST reply actions
No Politics….Until now.
Al Smith got a bum deal.
by parlin on Dec 13, 2011 2:05 PM CST reply actions
I am sure that after this failed attempt at politics, Craig James will handle himself with as much class as Tom Osborne has.
by WanderingHorn on Dec 13, 2011 2:11 PM CST reply actions
OK! It’s now time for this asshole to be effectively put-in-his-place. I really don’t see how he could possibly put up any “real” competition to Cruz or Dewhurst, but stranger things have happened. I hope he causes himself to be big enough pain in the ass for one of the other Republicans to get get good and pissed and for said Republican to hire someone dig up James’s past. This asshole is just begging to be made an example of! His total mismanagement of the Leach defaming only proved to the rest of us of how amateurish and stupid he is…. Hopefully this plunge into politics will destroy his perceived image, and have him released from ESPN. A CFB fan can only hope!
by Magnitude on Dec 13, 2011 2:13 PM CST reply actions
chairman is correct; Craig James has no shot in that primary. Running for US Senate is no place for amateurs.
by jonestopten on Dec 13, 2011 2:13 PM CST reply actions
Craig James has never denied the allegation that he killed 5 hookers while at SMU, that’s all I’m saying.
by PatronSaint on Dec 13, 2011 2:15 PM CST reply actions
Dead hookers are nothing compared to scores of dead immigrants who jumped from the burning Triangle Shirtwaist Factory. Al Smith got what was coming to him.
by Big Ern on Dec 13, 2011 2:16 PM CST reply actions
One thing for the grinning idiot alleged hooker killer to remember:
The statute of limitations is unlimited for a fraudulently filed tax return. Imagine someone, let’s say a star high school and college football player, accepts money to play at a certain school, lets call it Southern Money U. If that money was significant in total or in relation to his other income, and it was not reported on his Form 1040, that return is still open. It doesn’t matter how long ago it was. Penalties and interest continue to accrue. It is the same as if you never filed.
Let’s get some reporters looking into this. Think Yahoo Sports might be interested?
by Longhorn in Canada on Dec 13, 2011 2:18 PM CST reply actions
Magnitude – the Leach affair will seem like nothing compared to getting the IRS on his ass.
by Longhorn in Canada on Dec 13, 2011 2:19 PM CST reply actions
LnC, good call! That hadn’t even occurred to me. What’s the penalties and interest due to the IRS for backed income taxes on minimum earnings of $50,000 from nearly 30 years ago? Anyone got an idea?
by Magnitude on Dec 13, 2011 2:33 PM CST reply actions
As someone who lives in DC, I beg of you who are in Texas, please, please, please do not send him here.
by WanderingHorn on Dec 13, 2011 2:34 PM CST reply actions
The statute of limitations is unlimited for a fraudulently filed tax return. Imagine someone, let’s say a star high school and college football player, accepts money to play at a certain school, lets call it Southern Money U. If that money was significant in total or in relation to his other income, and it was not reported on his Form 1040, that return is still open. It doesn’t matter how long ago it was. Penalties and interest continue to accrue. It is the same as if you never filed.
Southern Money U. dealt in straight cash homey — there is no paper trail — so good luck with that.
by srr50 on Dec 13, 2011 2:43 PM CST reply actions
“Do you still kill hookers, Mr James?”
“For how long and how many hookers have you personally killed, Mr. James?”
by Team Dirty Leg on Dec 13, 2011 2:44 PM CST reply actions
srr50 – We do have the testimony of a former governor, and the IRS is pretty good at finding under-the-table payments. No, I don’t really think there is a chance, but a man can dream, can’t he?
by Longhorn in Canada on Dec 13, 2011 2:58 PM CST reply actions
Are we underselling the idea that a guy could be a complete fraudulent tax filing, hooker killing jackass, and that this might not be a good thing in a Republican primary? Food for thought.
by TexanNick on Dec 13, 2011 3:01 PM CST reply actions
What’s the statute of limitations for conspiracy to kill 5 hookers? Let’s suppose that Craig James did not actually kill 5 hookers, but that he only conspired to kill 5 hookers. Would Craig James then still be on the hook for the crime of conspiring to kill 5 hookers, or would he only be “prosecutable” if he actually killed the 5 hookers?
by Filmore Slim on Dec 13, 2011 3:05 PM CST reply actions
Psst Sailor – if some enterprising young reporter asks Mr. James about the time he allegedly killed 5 hookers at SMU, send that go-getter a free tote bag. I’ll pay.
by Dagga Roosta on Dec 13, 2011 3:06 PM CST reply actions
Filmore, I’m not licensed in TX, but I bet there is no statute of limitations on conspiracy to commit murder.
by WanderingHorn on Dec 13, 2011 3:08 PM CST reply actions
Craig James?
Wasn’t he married to Sandra Bullock?
by ole tnhorn on Dec 13, 2011 3:11 PM CST reply actions
All politicians are completely irrelevant. Nor one of them is in charge of anything other than playing a Punch’n’Judy bit part.
If voting could change the system, it would be illegal." — Robert Anton Wilson
If NOT voting could change the system, it would be illegal." — Robert Anton Wilson
by Tex Long on Dec 13, 2011 3:15 PM CST reply actions
Do we know that he actually killed the hookers and did not simply maim them for life?
by Big Ern on Dec 13, 2011 3:42 PM CST reply actions
Sailor has it exactly right, the popularity of college football will lead inevitably to Senator Craig James. As soon as college football fans figure out they will never have to listen to that wind bag stinking up every halfway decent college football game, they will vote in droves.
Well I suppose most of them will still have to register first, but trust me this is a done deal.
by roach on Dec 13, 2011 4:04 PM CST reply actions
I wonder how he will be received in Dallas?
by Snide Aside on Dec 13, 2011 4:18 PM CST reply actions
“chairman is correct; Craig James has no shot in that primary. Running for US Senate is no place for amateurs.”
This.
by Al Franken on Dec 13, 2011 4:45 PM CST reply actions
One-word adjective for Papa “Call me Senator” James:
Delusional.
Of course, that didn’t prevent him from somehow getting the ESPN gig so . . . say, was there anyone else with James when he killed those five hookers (allegedly)?
by AKHorn on Dec 13, 2011 4:59 PM CST reply actions
Were those 5 hookers discovered in storage sheds?
by Wyatt on Dec 13, 2011 6:06 PM CST reply actions
Hey everyone on this thread, what’s with the whole dead hookers thing?
by Young Williams on Dec 13, 2011 8:15 PM CST reply actions
James’ first order of business should be to hire Sherwood Blount as his campaign finance fundraiser.
by srr50 on Dec 13, 2011 8:20 PM CST reply actions
Young Williams, Craig James killed 5 Dallas area prostitutes during his time at SMU. There have. Even dark hints of many since, but those five have the preponderance of circumstantial evidence.
One thing is certain: Craig James has yet to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that he didn’t kill five hookers.
by CrazyJoeDavola on Dec 13, 2011 9:05 PM CST reply actions
I saw him as he was about to kill a hooker and I stopped it. Well, I didn’t physically stop it, but I made sure it had stopped before I left the alley.
by Fried Rice on Dec 13, 2011 9:10 PM CST reply actions
He is going to run on an “abdication of hooker’s rights platform”…..
by Growler on Dec 13, 2011 9:10 PM CST reply actions
Apparently Craig James has also infected my iPhone and slain its capacity to type correctly.
by CrazyJoeDavola on Dec 13, 2011 9:47 PM CST reply actions
Are we sure it was just five prostitutes? Like many sexual abuse cases, there could be more dead hookers out there that are too embarassed to come forward.
by Tipsy Gypsie on Dec 13, 2011 10:02 PM CST reply actions
I doubt he will even carry Celina. It may be his home but they dont cotton to hooker killers there
by BEW on Dec 13, 2011 11:09 PM CST reply actions
Between whoring himself out to SMU and the frame up job he did on Leach; James obviously has the lack of ethics often found in politicians. Now throw in the horrid analysis he’s paid to make as an “expert” on college football. Oh yes, big things await Craig James should he broaden his horizons.
If anyone competent runs against him, they should be able to crush him in debate and use his past to smear him in ads. The nation would derive much laughter from the aftermath if it went viral. Maybe ESPN would even get a clue and drop him. Okay, that one might be the most unlikely, but I can dream.
Scary that someone out there might actually consider backing this pony. He could promise world peace and golden eggs for everyone, and I’m still going to cast my vote elsewhere. Apologies to college football fans everywhere if that results in him continuing to ruin coverage of the sport sitting next to Jesse “Tweedledee” Palmer.
by Saul on Dec 14, 2011 1:14 AM CST reply actions
Sounds like James just might be our next governor instead of senator.
by lurkerinthedark on Dec 14, 2011 1:37 AM CST reply actions
When will he address the allegations about him murdering five Dallas hookers? That’s the burning question here.
Also, I think the Senate primary is probably the right place for someone to go “full Putin” and start riding horses shirtless and hunting tigers and shit. If James will do that then I will send him two American dollars.
by Toadvine on Dec 14, 2011 4:56 AM CST reply actions
A lot of talk here in DC about Craig James and some dead hookers when he was in college. Heard at the Capitol Lounge the other day that Craig James was under investigation for as many as 5 dead prostitutes while at SMU.
He needs to make a statement, ASAP.
by Bateshorn on Dec 14, 2011 6:29 AM CST reply actions
Yeah, the allegations are really picking up steam, the ones about Craig James killing at least 5 prostitutes while at SMU:
http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2011/7/19/2282724/the-curious-index-7-19-2011
http://www.ogboards.com/forums/showthread.php?s=4735eb3f170bdddce0ab650d525e5c41&p=478553#post478553
http://www.reddit.com/r/CFB/comments/nbajm/is_the_us_senate_big_enough_for_a_man_who_killed/
by Toadvine on Dec 14, 2011 6:39 AM CST reply actions
this is an extremely curious move. granted, it’s been rumored for awhile that James wanted to run for an office. but why announce right now for US Senate? there may not be another candidate in the state that could be labeled as “establishment” as Dewhurst. he’s got all the money. no money is going against him because he comes back as lt guv if he loses. statewide races require money.
and cruz already has the wacko/tea party support. Leppert will prob get more votes in dfw.
highly doubtful that cruz can even force a runoff. nevermind james being involved in it.
I seriously don’t know who James thinks is going to vote for him, particularly this late in the election season. I am curious if he even hired credible people. he obviously hasn’t raised any money.
there are plenty of metroplex House seats he could challenge for that are potentially winnable. this is not and will simply be a waste of his time.
dumb. dumb. dumb.
by txsa on Dec 14, 2011 7:37 AM CST reply actions
I am thinking James should go “quarter Putin” or maybe even “half Putin” in the primary. But going “full Putin”?
by Big Ern on Dec 14, 2011 8:52 AM CST reply actions
The hookers are a dead issue. Whores don’t vote.
by The General on Dec 14, 2011 9:45 AM CST reply actions
Jason Embry pretty much has the same questions I do:
by txsa on Dec 14, 2011 10:07 AM CST reply actions
The hookers are a dead issue.
Ha-ha.
Whores don’t vote.
Actually, some of them do… at least, some of the ones I know (ha-ha) tell me they do.
Dead people vote, too. In Illinois, for sure, and in Texas (see if you can channel LBJ, he’ll confirm for you).
Whether people who are both hookers and dead (if that’s possible – maybe in Happy Valley?) also vote, I don’t really know… but the two halves of the equation are there, so it’s certainly possible, at the very least.
by Tex Long on Dec 14, 2011 10:27 AM CST reply actions
I personally wonder if James is running to insulate himself from Mike Leach’s lawsuits under a government immunity claim. As a private individual he’s exposed to some liability.
In any case, James has no chance against Dewhurst in the Republican primary. However, if by some miracle James wins the primary he wont be on ESPN until after the Nov elections. So there would definitely be some silver lining.
by stevo67 on Dec 14, 2011 10:46 AM CST reply actions
Stevo67: Even if he were to win, being a Senator doesn’t convey immunity from civil actions. See Paula Corbin Jones v. William Jefferson Clinton.
by TexanNick on Dec 14, 2011 11:52 AM CST reply actions
He has no hope of winning. I’m somehow not completely shocked that he hasn’t figured that out.
by Bob in Houston on Dec 14, 2011 1:26 PM CST reply actions
Texan Nick: I agree with you that being a government official shouldn’t convey sovereign immunity from civil actions. What I should have written is that Craig James may believe that running for office will shield him from Leach’s litigation- in which case he’s a bigger idiot than I thought. I should have been clearer in how I communicated that, my bad.
by stevo67 on Dec 14, 2011 3:09 PM CST reply actions
Big Ern:
The half-Putin gets you nothing but a Botoxed face and maybe, if you’re super lucky, a couple od squads of Chechnyian death dealers. The full Putin is way manlier and allows you to lock up your wife in an asylum, put on sunglasses like David Caruso, and basically just deal out awesomeness.
by Toadvine on Dec 15, 2011 6:15 AM CST reply actions

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