Soft Shocks to the Rebel Flock

Scott Halleran - Getty Images

Alpaquito checks in with the latest trends in the Longhorn offense

Dear, Dear Alpaca. It has been an arduous journey fraught with arid hills and frightening storms. I have gathered you here after so much hardship and wanting and doubt so that you might be quieted and comforted. Here, in this beautiful Grove, I will share with you the breadth of the vision that I have spoken of so often. I have given you only glimpses until now because, Soft Alpaca, it was all our haggard flock could bare. But we grow stronger, Alpaquito. Oh and we hunger, Alpaqueños. For green grass, yet untouched by the passing of others.

Worry not, my Alpacan Prince, open fields now await us and our fleeces will be full one day soon. But never forget the hunger lest you take your fertile fields for granted. Now be still harried one, and bare witness.

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