Big 12 Rewind: Week 6 - Tragicomedy in Ames

FRANKLY WE'RE GETTING FUCKED HERE, SIR - Reese Strickland-USA TODAY Sport

The Longhorns steal one, Baylor puts up 70 again, and OU survives a scare in Norman.

Texas vs Iowa State

Coming off a thrilling, hard fought, well earned victory against the Iowa State Cyclones under the lights at Jack Trice Stadium, Mack Brown's Texas Longhorns are 2-0 in conference play and still in position to win the Big.../bill little intro.

Holy!Shit! MBTF is lucky to still be employed after Texas inexplicably abandoned the running game, which produced two easy scores, in favor of what can only be described as a chuck-the-ball-in-the-air-off-the-backfoot-toward-the-sidelines-hoping-Mike-Davis-gets-a-PI-call-when-not-illegally-chop-blocking-DBs type of game plan. The Texas offensive gameplan was seemingly prepared by Iowa State's defensive coordinator, as Case McCoy attempted 46 passes, less than half of which met their intended or unintended target. I have never felt dirtier after a Texas victory than the one in Ames, where everything seemed to go the way of the team that really didn't deserve it. And that was one hell of a press conference, Paul Rhoads.

Here's some advice for this weekend: Instead of watching the game with Brent and Herbie, or God forbid actually attending the massacre, just watch the entire 2005 Texas / OU game on a loop, get drunk, and hope you wake up in December.

Pre-game locker room scene, crunk n' loose:

FULL GAME

Meanwhile in Norman ...

Oklahoma vs TCU

The Sooners are coming off a tight 20-17 win at home over TCU, sealed by a 76 yard Brennan Clay TD run in the 4th quarter. TCU did not convert a first down until just before the 8:34 mark in the third quarter, as OU's defense held the Horned Frogs to seven straight 3 & outs to start the game. TCU never crossed midfield in the first half. (Will Texas make it outside of its own 20?!) Despite only gaining 44 yards on the ground and 210 total offensive yards, TCU was still in contention to win the game in the fourth quarter after scoring 17 in the second half. TCU held OU's offense without a first down in the third quarter and had flipped the table on Stoops until Clay's TD run to ice the game. Blake Bell threw for 150 on 20 completions and rushed for 60.

Next Up: OU vs Texas | TCU vs Kansas

Oklahoma State vs Kansas State

One week after getting upset in Morgantown, it almost happened again against Kansas State, but J.W. Walsh completed a 6 yd TD pass to Charlie Moore to seal a 33-29 victory over a bad Kansas State squad. The Wildcats matched Okie State in first downs (19), total yards (336 / 330) and had more time of possession. Taking over for QB Jake Waters, Daniel Sams threw for 3 TDs and 300 yards and had he not also turned the ball over four times, K. State would have left Stillwater with a win and T. Boone calling Shitbird into the office for a late night chat.

Next Up: Kansas State - Baylor | Oklahoma State - BYE

Baylor vs West Virginia

Baylor continues to destroy conference records on offense. The Bears had 864 total yards, breaking the Big 12 record set last year against WVU. They had more rushing yards (468) than passing (396) while exceeding the school-record 781 total yards they had in each of their last two games. Can 1,000 be far away? /checks calendar for Texas game...It took all of 40 seconds to get on the board against the Mountaineers and by the time Holgo's hangover wore off, it was a boatrace between Bryce Petty (17/25/347) and Lache Seastrunk (15/172) to see who could get to the endzone first.

"Our players played extremely active and with a lot of intensity and purpose," coach Art Briles said.

That's how other coaches do it anyway. (Those that enjoy winning, as opposed to say, spending your time and resources monitoring online detractors and creating blacklists of program enemies. Thanks for reading!)

Art Briles may be an asshole but damn if he can't prepare an offense. Defense becomes an afterthought when you score 70 every game but Baylor is 1-9 against the spread in it's last 10 Big 12 road games and next up is a trip to Manhattan.

Next up: Baylor vs. Kansas State (yes, still lay the 17 points) | West Virginia - BYE

Texas Tech vs Kansas

The 5-0 Red Raiders spotted Kansas a 10 point lead in the first quarter and that was not enough for Charlie Weis in the end, as Texas Tech scored 54 unanswered and Kansas lost it's 22nd straight Big 12 game. Unfortunately, former Lake Travis QB Baker Mayfield, a true freshman walk-on, limped off the field in the fourth quarter with a leg injury that could keep him out indefinitely. Fellow freshman Davis Webb will take over at QB, hopefully replicating the 100 plays and 500+ yards the Red Raiders reeled off against Kansas. Eric Ward (7/122) and Jace Amaro (9/96) continue to move the chains through the air while the Tech running game was held to an anemic 143 yards on 43 carries by committee.

Next up: Texas Tech @ West Virginia | Kansas @ TCU

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