Barking Carnival

Movies

Mickey Rourke

If you’re familiar with Mickey Rourke, you know him as the guy who has had a lot of plastic surgery and happened to steal the show with his performance in Sin City. But I’m telling you, Mickey Rourke was wrecking shit in the ’80s. The guy put together a string of performances that were exceptional […]

Iron Man Review For Nerds

How can you tell it’s not football season? We are talking about comic books. I have a feeling that the demographic for this is me and me alone but I’m doing this anyway because Ain’t It Cool News won’t post my reviews ever since I admitted that I liked the second Matrix movie better than […]

Richard Widmark 1914-2008

The actor Richard Widmark passed away last Wednesday. You might remember him as the guy who played Jim Bowie in ‘The Alamo.’ But if you don’t know who he was, you’re the reason that Dane Cook gets movie roles. And the reason Austin High grads watch ‘Love Actually.’
Like all actors he had an up and […]

Net Flix Picks

Here are a four movies that you may have missed out on that you should add to your Netflix queue. You’ll thank me unless your tastes run primarily to Armageddon or Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever. If there’s one common thread to be found in the four varied movies below, it’s that each respects the […]

Jake Gyllenhaal: A Regular Broadway Joe

Memorandum
To: Hollywood
From: Scip E.O. Tex, Internet Provocateur
CC: God Loving Free World
Date: This very instant
Re: You are destroying America, motherfuckers

Dear Hollywood,
You’ve gone and done it now. This is war. WAR!
At what point during your Hotel Bel-Air mid-wine flight post-synagogue movie pitch to Harvey Weinstein did you get the idea that Joe Willie […]

Bourne Three

Saw the latest in the Bourne trilogy at the Drafthouse last night.
Bourne is a cross between MacGyver and Jet Li with the face of a man with Down Syndrome. Take Damon’s character in Saving Private Ryan, send him to an assassin school where he learns to call Brendan Fraser a Jew and strangles Ben Affleck […]

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  • Crazy Joe Clark: I still like him as Harley Davidson. also did a little nice work in "Man of...
  • TJ Hooshamazoo: Well-fucking-done, sir....
  • WWGDD: Kreuz is without a doubt the best as it has been for 100+ years. Cooper's is ou...
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