Greatest. Rumour. Evar!!!!
Latest rumour on the internets and the Austin talk radios is Teh Major to Texas as co-offensive coordinator and quarterbacks coach.
I’ve been told that we’re done with coaching changes this offseason, but something like this has to be true. And if it is, Oklahoma’s record 47-game winning streak will be broken.
In Major’s first year.
January 9, 2008 at 11:48 am
Unless your name is Willy Shakehizspear, Olde English is only meant for drinking with your homies.
January 9, 2008 at 11:56 am
I hope he goes back to his home and whoops on those sooners.
January 9, 2008 at 12:09 pm
I am heady. I am gritty. I am remarkably youthful in appearance.
I am Major Applewhite. Sooners faint from sheer terror in my presence. Heisman Trophy winners’ women lust after me. Aggy worships me as the God of the Underworld.
January 9, 2008 at 12:29 pm
I hear Mack’s already made a deal with Phil Simms to bring Chris Simms back to Austin in 2009 and make him Major’s boss.
January 9, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Of course. No one has an opinion on our new defensive coordinator, but HJ jumps on this in record time…
January 9, 2008 at 12:57 pm
I have an opinion on our new defensive coordinator. Jut wanted to point that out.
January 9, 2008 at 12:59 pm
We won’t even need a defense if we hire Teh Major.
January 9, 2008 at 1:23 pm
You won’t even need a team.
January 9, 2008 at 1:30 pm
You were told wrong about there not beng any more coaching changes.
January 9, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Apparently so. Rucker is now the ‘director of high school relations and player development.’
January 9, 2008 at 2:06 pm
And I will soon be named Texas’s “Director of Kickin’ Ass and Takin’ Names.”
Bow before me, minions!
January 9, 2008 at 2:13 pm
Whatever.
January 9, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Shouldn’t one take names before one kicks asses? This has always vexed me. Fucking earthlings.
January 9, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Is it too early to inquire about Chris Simms’ whereabouts?
January 9, 2008 at 2:34 pm
I thought heard someone say that Sooner needed his ass kicked.
January 9, 2008 at 2:41 pm
My knees hurt.
January 9, 2008 at 2:50 pm
El Mejor es un hombre mas caliente!
January 9, 2008 at 2:54 pm
We eagerly await the arrival of The Major. We seek only to bask in his Aura and harvest the women he attracts.
January 9, 2008 at 4:08 pm
This is so sweet! He has been putting up much huger numbers running GD’s offense than GD ever thought about. GD sucks! Major rules! Remember when we won that Holiday bowl against a bad Washington team that we were down 3 touchdowns to because Greg Davis committed all of those interceptions in the first half. That was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!
January 9, 2008 at 4:52 pm
In other news; Palestinians are living in peace with Jewish settlers.
January 9, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Where’s Milkman Dan with a post of the “Jesus Applewhite” image when you need it?
January 9, 2008 at 8:20 pm
Sooner does quake. Will Britt Hager be defensive coodinator???
January 9, 2008 at 8:21 pm
in a related quote Peter Gardere said, “Major’s my bitch”
January 10, 2008 at 9:04 am
When reached for comment, The Major said, “Stoops is my bitch.”
January 10, 2008 at 10:56 am
Some guy’s girlfriend sat next to me on a comet-trailing spaceship and kept asking me about recruiting and shit. I think she thought I was someone else.
January 10, 2008 at 11:55 am
Sorry to keep you waiting, sizzle. If only it could be embedded…
January 10, 2008 at 12:35 pm
We are not worthy.
January 10, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Only say the word, and we shall score touchdowns.
January 10, 2008 at 12:39 pm
I’m considering a lawsuit and a restraining order to prevent the further appropriation of my likeness.
January 10, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Fuckin’ amateurs.
January 11, 2008 at 9:35 am
Will Simms have “Greg Davis”, “Mac McWhorter”, and “Bruce Chambers” tattooed on his other ankle?
January 14, 2008 at 3:42 pm
The Tuscaloosa News is reporting that Applewhite is going to interview with Texas.
http://www.tidesports.com/article/20080114/NEWS/28735821/1011
January 14, 2008 at 4:31 pm
The Statesman quotes nameless sources close to Applewhite as saying it’s a done deal.
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