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Travis Henry out-bastards Shawn Kemp

Broncos running back Travis Henry has fathered nine children with nine women. Major League Baseball is thinking of awarding him a team. According to the Atlanta Journal Constitution they’re “scattered across both the American and National Football Conferences…”

Despite signing a contract with Denver that averages almost $50,000 a month, he’s having trouble meeting his child support obligations. Why? Because he’s spending most of his money on cars and jewelry. Duh.

One of the women suing him for child support won a judgement against him recently. Her lawyer, Robert Wellon, asked that a trust be set up in the amount of $250,000 because Henry usually missed the $800 a month payments earlier agreed upon.

“My argument was, if he makes wise investments, other than in gold chains, then he should be able to make the payments,” Wellon said.

He needs to invest in a condom.

Reporter
“You need to diversify yo’ bonds, nigga!”

  1. Doperbo
    August 25, 2007 at 10:25 am

    A spokesman for Tom Brady commented: “Tom is aware of Mr. Henry’s feat and offers his congratulations. As an athlete, setting goals working toward them is what it’s all about. Tom has been putting in the time this off-season- 20 minutes here, 20 minutes there, doing the things it takes to be more productive each day, focusing on his goal one piece at a time.”

    Matt Leinart was unavailable for comment.

  2. CommishCH
    August 27, 2007 at 11:47 am

    “We’re called jimmy hats, have you ever seen us?
    Most guys wear us round rolled up on your penis”- Ice Cube, 1991

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