Jones Top Ten - Week 2 - 2008
Boss and Charlie should be two characters in a Howard Hawks movie. Instead, the two boys, ages four and three, sit quietly at the bar with their dads. Reasonably quietly anyway; there is only so much quiet a Sonic kid’s meal can guarantee. Boss goes by “Boss” because his full title is entirely too complicated (he is a fifth; I’m guessing his parents don’t favor “Quint” as a nickname). Charlie is simply a Charlie. I know this because I have a Charlie. This cotton-topped version gives himself away by crawling undetected under my stool, three seats away from his dad. The two dads to my right and the childhood friend to my left have watched a lot of college football together over the years at various venues. This one boasts Guinness on tap and formidable pizza, not bad. We used to watch these games among friends. Now, more often than not, we watch them among children. There’s not really much difference.
And you never know what will happen next.
East Carolina 24, West Virginia 3
What the…? Let’s get one thing straight; I am not surprised East Carolina won. But 24-3? Before Saturday, I always accepted the proposition that Pat White could score at least two touchdowns in his pajamas. Either East Carolina plays at a much higher level than I suspected, even after last week, or Bill Stewart is completely in over his head at WVU. Probably a little of both.
Ohio State should no longer surprise any of us by playing down to the level of a bad MAC opponent and then apologizing to their fan base afterward. This week’s contestant was Ohio, landing spot for the comedic stylings of Frank Solich, who was, of course, let go in favor of Bill Callahan, who, of course, proceeded to dismantle the proud tradition of Nebraska football in a manner that would make John Mackovic, Mike DuBose and Bob Davie invite him over to their table for a celebratory drink. In any case, the Solich-led Bobcats (not a good football team by any stretch of even Steven Speilberg’s imagination) thoroughly outplayed the Bucknuts through three quarters before our heroes finally prevailed in a “shaky” 26-14 win.
Can we retire the word “shaky?” Because my guess is that on the first day of journalism school aspiring sports writers are required to write multiple paragraphs describing the shaky performance of a favorite in a let-down game. It’s always shaky. Never wobbly, flimsy, unstable, precarious…OK, putting the thesaurus down. How about these: squeamish, timid, nervous, apoplectic, jim-jammy, queasy, seamy, befuddling, carking, blippy, mashugana and fallacious.
Alabama went all mashugana in an ugly 20-6 win over Tulane.
Utah survived a squeamish first half, but took out UNLV 42-21.
Wisconsin survived a carking start, but then overwhelmed Marshall, 51-14.
Texas Tech befuddled past Nevada 35-19.
This has potential. Next week we will work on eradicating “survived.”
Washington, God love ‘em, got completely torqued by the officials, who made one of the most asinine decisions I’ve ever seen by assessing an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty on Husky QB Jake Locker after a potential game-tying touchdown against favored BYU. The ensuing PAT, from 35 yards instead of 20, was blocked to preserve Brigham Young’s 28-27 win. What did Ty Willingham do in a past life to deserve this stretch of awfulness in his career (I mean other than fail to recruit any decent players at Notre Dame—I was speaking metaphysically)?
In the day’s best game, Central Florida staged a highly improbable comeback against South Florida. USF quarterback Matt Grothe delivered down the stretch to rescue a 31-24 overtime win for the Bulls after Delbert Alvarado missed a field goal that would have won it in regulation. I was left wondering why a family named Alvarado called a child Delbert. Somewhere deep in the woods of Appalachia, there must be a misnamed Ignacio Hatfield wondering who screwed up his birth certificate.
In the other Florida battle, which was a much less entertaining game with about a hundred times the hype, Florida beat Miami 26-3 in a game notable for the lack of Gator players who could block my late aunt Norma and for a curious Gator field goal at the end that had, it is my understanding, some impact on the betting line. In any case, Miami played swarming and, at times, overwhelming defense. Tim Tebow and the boys made the plays when they had to and Florida’s own defense shut down a ‘Cane offense that was, for most of the night, truly offensive.
USC didn’t play, but Georgia did their best Trojan impersonation by blasting a decent Central Michigan squad 56-17. Knowshon Moreno was not half bad.
Oklahoma had a few jim-jammy moments, but eventually doubled up Cincinnati, 52-26.
Ditto Auburn, who let Southern Miss off the mat a bit, but won comfortably 27-13 and Texas, who failed to play the third quarter, but did re-appear in the early fourth to put away UTEP 42-13.
Missouri bombed Southeast Missouri back to the stone age 52-3 and their Kansas neighbors shut out Louisiana Tech 29-0.
Speaking of Kansas, the Jayhawks travel to South Florida next week in what may well be a far better game than USC/Ohio State.
Penn State crushed Oregon State 45-14 at Happy Valley. Sports Illustrated tabbed Oregon State as the 18th best squad in the nation in their preview issue. That’s puzzling beyond belief and makes me think that even I could write for Sports Illustrated some day.
Then I think that I’m the same guy who thought Tennessee and Rutgers would win the Monday night games this week. Uh, no. Tennessee’s performance was particularly noxious, proving in the process that the Vols can give away a game just about any way possible and that Norm Chow and Rick Neuheisel still know a fair amount about coaching quarterbacks.
Oregon splattered Utah State 66-24, which is expected. Cal scored the same 66 on Wazzu, a team that must be a special kind of bad. Arizona State shook off some rust in a queasy first-half and pulled away from Stanford, 41-17.
Wake Forest beat Ole Miss 30-28 on a last-second Sam Swank field goal, the 65th of his career.
Paul Johnson has decided to run the triple-option with real athletes, the likes of whom don’t attend the US Naval Academy. So far, so good. Georgia Tech 19, Boston College 16.
Notre Dame escaped by the skin of Charlie Weis’s neck, well, actually it was far thinner than that, with a 21-13 home win over San Diego State.
The Thursday night special really was. Underappreciated Vanderbilt quarterback Chris Nickson led the Commodores to a second-half comeback upset, 24-17 over South Carolina. The Gamecocks had referred to Vandy as the “sorriest team in the SEC” after last year’s upset loss, but didn’t have any answers this year either. Actually, Vanderbilt hasn’t been the sorriest team in the SEC for quite some time. Mrs. Jones Top Ten will tell you that.
Impressive Showing of the Week: East Carolina
The rankings are minus West Virginia, naturally; but, past that demotion, I have jumbled them up even further than logic dictates. I am not ready for USC to be number one because Virginia may be atrocious. Let’s not kid ourselves about Ohio State anymore and I am serious about Florida: the next Miami defensive end they block will be the first. Oklahoma’s back seven looks like a potential horror movie and no one else is ready for prime time, although I am warming to Missouri. That leaves us going to the Dawgs…
1. Georgia
2. USC
3. Florida
4. Oklahoma
5. Missouri
6. Ohio State with Beanie Wells on the field
7. Auburn
8. Texas
9. East Carolina
10. Kansas
South Florida can take Kansas’s spot away from them if they are good enough on Saturday. I need to see LSU play somebody worth watching after they postponed this week’s game with Troy. Alabama needs to not read their press clippings from the Clemson game anymore and both Penn State and Oregon look very good to this untrained eye.
You know what? Even in a week with a schedule as lousy as this one, this sport of ours is not a bad way to spend a Saturday.
Rose Bowl Dreams: A Memoir of Faith Family and Football is the new book by Adam Jones.
September 7, 2008 at 8:13 pm
am i the only one who thinks the clausen looks some super athletic version of cabbage patch doll, and plays and acts like one as well, weiss is probably going to regret he ever recruited that little temper tantrum waiting to happen.
i gotta believe that bama should be included on this list. i don’t know if their sec schedule is going to allow them to show it, but i gotta believe that they are one of the ten best teams in country. what they did to clemson was unreal and no i don’t think that clemson sucks that bad, bama just made them look that bad.
September 7, 2008 at 8:21 pm
I’m always amazed to read of a Longhorn fan chiding another program (LSU) for lack of a quality opponent in their OOC. Florida Atlantic, UTEP, Arkansas and Rice doesn’t give us bragging rights over the Tigers. Glass houses and all……………
You’re dead on about the great game of CFB.
September 7, 2008 at 8:53 pm
Look who’s number 8!
September 7, 2008 at 10:07 pm
I think UGa at #1 isn’t anything but a placeholder pick until USC and tOSU play.
Florida above OU is untenable. Did everyone on this website just stop watching the game at halftime? OU was up 42-20 going into the 4th quarter.
Anyone watching the Miami-UF game noticed that Florida successfully proved two things. 1) They still don’t have a legit running game. 2) Their offense is still way too dependent on Tim Tebow. UF was only up 9-3 going into the 4th quarter. 9-3. At home. Against a Miami team that even Cincinnati would beat by 10.
Jones, help me out. You’re warming to Missouri, but you think OU’s secondary could be a horror show? Apparently, we put logic on hold for this one. I’m not warm to Mizzou at all. They made Juice Williams look like a Heisman candidate on his PASSING.
September 8, 2008 at 2:55 am
“Penn State crushed Oregon State 45-14 at Happy Valley. Sports Illustrated tabbed Oregon State as the 18th best squad in the nation in their preview issue. That’s puzzling beyond belief and makes me think that even I could write for Sports Illustrated some day.”
SI also picked Pitt 21st in the country, so you have to wonder how much Ancient Age the writer consumed before dummying up that poll.
Penn State, on the other hand, is awfully damn good and may end up being the best team in the Big 10. They have very impressive team speed.
September 8, 2008 at 3:43 am
Whoa there, I wasn’t chiding LSU. I just wanted to see them play this week because I think they are very good. Texas has nothing to do with it (and I chide Texas all the time — ask the long time readers).
Nate: But I ranked OU ahead of Missouri. That’s logical. OU’s secondary worries me less than Mizzou’s, but both of them have their problems. That said, Mizzou’s offense is sublime.
September 8, 2008 at 5:33 am
i doubt if ou should be placed ahead of florida, florida may have some deficiencies on offense, but ou probably has a bigger one and which is less correctable than florida if it faces a legit stout defense. aside from ou’s secondary issues, ou’s greatest limiting factor to me is bradford’s lack of mobility. and i don’t believe he is elusive in the pocket either to make up for that lack of mobility. i gotta believe that if ou ever faces a team that can pressure bradford, that team can shut ou’s offense down as a matter of fact. just refer to the west virginia game to see what token pressure does to ou’s offense. them beating ou was no fluke. i gotta believe that there are more than five teams out there that could do just that and shut ou’s offense down. as long as bradford is there, pressure is ou’s achilles heel. when that big o-line moves on after this year, i suspect this weakness will become quite a bit more evident.
September 8, 2008 at 5:51 am
Pac 10 refs doth forsake Ty Willingham, too.
OU needs to get up big early to nullify the Gordon Riese factor.
September 8, 2008 at 5:59 am
Steve, Florida has a bigger problem- they are overrated due to being in the SEC, the conference of lackluster offensive schemes and weak OOC schedules.
(Note- this is a test of the SEC computerized “Internet Disrespect Monitoring System”. Let’s see how long it takes to get a response)
September 8, 2008 at 6:18 am
Like a few said last week, ‘Bama is good but don’t let the Clemson factor fool you.
September 8, 2008 at 6:59 am
i am no sec homey and the sec may just be somewhat overrated, but i do not see how anyone could say that they are any more so than the b12. you know what they say, it is not about the x’s and the o’s, its about the jimmies and the joes and the sec just has flat out better althetes, especially on defense, from top to bottom than any other conference hands down, with the pac10 probably coming in a distant second. the sec’s lackluster offenses maybe be a valid point, but i gotta believe a lot of that is probably due to just facing better defenses week in and week out. for example, look at what the bama defense did to the tech offense in the cotton bowl a few years back. now tell me the last time a big12 defense just domiinated and throttled tech’s offense like bama did in just one attempt. a lot of the big12’s offensive schemes maybe effective for one game year against the sec, as a surprise factor, but i think they would be much more difficult to run and less effective week in and week out in the sec. their defenses are just too stout and it could just get your qb killed. if one wants to see the gap in just basic athleticism, just check out the game between a&m and miami (not an sec team but has sec type athleticism). aside from johnson’s mobility, miami will shut down the ags down and it is probably going to look like a massacre. also the jury may still be out on bama, but does anyone think that if bama were to play texas tommorow that texas would be favored, probably not. either way, the line probably would not go beyond + or -3 for either team and bama this year was supposed to be a middle of the pack team in the sec with the fewest numbers of returning starters with freshman playing thoughout their lineup.
September 8, 2008 at 7:16 am
Steven may be right about the athletes on D in the SEC or he may not be, but he gets an F- for citation of authority. Uses two examples: One is a single SEC game that is 3(?) years old in Tech’s only bowl loss in recent memory and the other is a non-SEC team.
September 8, 2008 at 7:30 am
We need a game against Bama. Lets play them nuertal site and extend our record to 7-0.
September 8, 2008 at 8:02 am
One hour. Not bad.
September 8, 2008 at 9:12 am
as far as examples go, i just did not want to write a post which was any longer, thought it was long enough, and i probably do not follow college football as religiously as some on these boards, but even just off the top of my head, how about lsu vs. oklahoma in the bcs, the same oklahoma team which ran roughshod through the b12, scoring in the 60’s vs. texas and 77 against a&m. the lsu defense shut them down in one attempt. or how about florida vs. ohio state. ohio state of those years would make a decent barometor for athleticism against the b12, since they played texas and it was obvious that they had athletes which were just as good if not better than texas overall. without vy, no doubt we would not have beaten them at home that year. also the year before osu just manhandled and embarrassed okie state in their bowl game. what did florida do. they just blew osu out and clearly had better athletes than osu and the same could be same for lsu a year later although the talent gap was not as large. also before anyone gets uppity about the b12, remember ou is supposedly the standard bearer for the b12 and ou has lost how many straight bcs games. i think four in a row and while texas has won both of their bcs games it has been to, does anyone really believe they would have done so if they did not have the special talent of vy under center. or how about arkansas vs. texas. they came and beat ut at home and then texas barely squeeked by them even with vy under center and those arkansas teams went on to be only average in the sec.
as far as the past vs. the present is concerned, i am afraid that the sec has been getting better over recent years and not worse, all the media hype and the dollars rolling in can only improve that league and of course encourage them to cheat, which they are famous for, even more than they have been if that is even within the realm of possibilities.
as far as a&m and miami is concerned, i just threw that out as an example, because we will get to see first hand the athletic talent differential this coming week. its the best example coming up since the b12 and sec does not play each other too often. for those a&m fans that want to move to the sec, they will get a first hand taste of what it is like to face a team with sec like athleticism on defense and i do not think it will be pretty. and while watching remember that although a&m has lost quite a bit from last year, this is still the same team which has played texas competitively for three straight years and beaten them for the last two years.