Barking Carnival, For Texas and NCAA football news

What's up, skanks? It's me, Clipper Cooper. Your natural master. How have you been? I'm actually not interested.

What's up, skanks? Last time I thought about Longhorn football, we were getting a game stolen by a bunch of floppy-banged NASCAR enthusiasts waving pom-poms like faggots, from a state with a GDP...

Skanks! I guess I should be grateful for our wins and our inevitable trip to the National Championship, but I truly believe the Cooper motto that, "Gratitude is the guilt of the unworthy." Many of...

Skaaaanks. The world has a handful of truly great cities - Riyadh, Monaco, Dallas - and this weekend highlights why Dallas is so often called the crown brooch in Lady Liberty's blouse. I can't...

I'll skip the pleasantries, skanks. I'm furious right now. I'm fuming. I haven't been this mad since Daddy gave money to OxFam! (Just piss away my inheritance, dude.) In his defense, he thought...

What's up skanks? It's me Clipper Cooper. I dictated this over my iPhone (I have the Platinum 3G, the one Steve Jobs carries) to a Barking Carnival stooge because I just had a manicure and I...

As you all know, Barking Carnival is in the process of seeking venture capital to improve the blog and to create the first international transgender foosball league. Pursuant to our agreement with...