North Korea Wants To Keep Austin Irradiated

As if Mack Brown didn't have enough problems with northern border aggressors.

From the UK's Daily Telegraph:

The images show a chart marked "US mainland strike plan" and missile trajectories that the NK News web site estimates terminate in Hawaii, Washington DC, Los Angeles and Austin, Texas.

Another past opponent pissed off that we won't split TV revenue.

The fact that North Korea couldn't hit their own ass with a canoe paddle notwithstanding, we're supposed to take a regime seriously that releases pictures of a world map purchased on Sky Mall magazine with big red arrows indicating We're Attacking Here with their generals sporting the military equivalent of trucker hats? Juche couture.

North Korea also purchased a doggie bed ramp (they use it in the kitchen, though) and a Seven Secrets of Seduction audiobook (North Korean seduction typically consists of kidnapping popular South Korean actresses and making them appear in propaganda films - and why can't the Taliban do this with Anne Hathaway?) In any event, this is just internal propaganda for the consumption of North Korea's citizens, a supplement to their normal diet of clay, grasshoppers, and tree bark.

Please have no doubt that should North Korea hurl something out via hand-cranked arbalest that could make it past Guam, it's guaranteed to skip right over Austin and hit College Station, resulting in the least humorous regime on the planet effectively delivering the best Aggie Joke Ever Told.

For your further amusement, I direct you to North Korea's official state website, you capitalist running dogs.