Too bad they aren’t playing each other.

You can read a Michigan/Miami (OH) preview at the excellent MGOBLOG.

Ohio State hasn’t lost to an in-state rival since the leather helmet era. They won’t lose today, but they start off with a 3 and out.

Ohio’s QB is fast. He scrambles for 13 on 2nd down. OSU has a well known weakness defending running QBs because they back off the running game so much. Ohio doesn’t look like they’ll be able to pass, but maybe they can run around enough to keep it close.

Michigan recovers a fumble and turns it into a quick field goal. That offense is inept without a QB who can run. Why Terrell Pryor chose Ohio State is beyond me. Because I cannot “afford” to understand.

Miami (OH) can’t tackle. Michigan is doing whatever they want on the ground. Why Miami is paying any attention to Threet is beyond me, but they are. That’s the danger of teaching the scheme instead of the game.

Threet overthrows a wide open touchdown. OSU’s boring aesthetic is looking pretty nice right about now. OSU picks up a boring field goal and I’m re-evaluating this entire venture.

Ohio is trying to run an offense without letting anyone run more than 7 yards down the field. At least they have a plan. They have a pretty athletic backfield but haven’t really done much with it do far, choosing a Greg Davis like mixture of screens and drop back passes. Now Ohio’s QB is down and injured. His backup has a huge afro coming out of his helmet. I hope he comes in.

Ohio punts and I flip stations just in time to see Miami miss a TD with an overthrown bomb. Bad teams are no fun to watch. Michigan’s defense under Lloyd Carr was known for their impeccable alignments. They had military like discipline when it came to lining up. Since it’s not 1985, this doesn’t really work, and the neo-Wolverine defense is showing a lot of different looks. They’ll improve based on this alone. They’re also destorying the Miami OL.

Ooh, my first looks at Pryor. Let’s see how Vince-like this kid is.

Well, I see it. He goes three and out but he has a funky delivery and deceptive speed. I don’t think he’s fast or strong as Vince, but who is? Plus it’s hard to tell without knowing how fast Ohio’s defense is.

Franshaw “Boo” Jackson is now my favorite player in the world. Ohio’s backup with the Oscar Gamble hair. He overthrows another sure TD. Ugh. Theo Scott looks seriously hurt, so this may be up to Undercover Brother. Who immediately throws an INT.

OSU’s possession starts with an near INT and a false start. I swear to Jeebus that I will start watching recorded episodes of The Venture Brothers instead of this garbage. Tood Boeckman runs for 13 for a first down. The run shares the entertainment value of watching an old person cross the street.

OSU is tough to evaluate because the typically only do what’s needed to win that particular game. And they always end up with some wacky score, like 32-5. If somebody scores 19 points in a game, it’s a pretty good bet OSU is involved. OSU looks on par with Ohio at the moment. You can see the difference when OSU needs yards, because they get them.

OSU fails on a 4th and 1, negating my acute observational skills. David Romer is probably doing the David Letterman collar tug. MOJOHD is showing a movie called 3 Women. I might just stick to that.

OSU is not getting any push up front. All their gains are coming from space. If anybody out there doubts the spread, just watch this game. Boo Jackson escapes pressure and throws a prayer that gets Ohio into OSU territory. Heisman future, here.

Jackson somehow wiggles past a fierce pass rush and runs for another first down. This is why I want Sheppard. Gilbert is a fantastic prospect but if you can run almost nothing else matters. Jackson isn’t even that fast and he’s handling his business.

Boo! Ohio up 7-3 now on a run by a freshman RB. 11 play, 72 yard drive for my man Boo Jackson. His magical afro has Ohio believing.

Miami manages to not drop a wide open pass for once and gets themselves inside the Michigan 10. Then they fumble the snap for the second time. 11am football. No wonder I always doze off in the second quarter. Can’t wait for the huge Northwestern/Northern Illinois tilt.

Ohio’s SS commits a ChrisApplewhite cardinal sin, dropping into coverage watching hte QB and covering no one in particular. He lets the TE run right behind him unmolested and OSU gets a 17 yard gain or so. Cover someone! The grass can’t hurt you. Unless you’re Beanie Wells. OSU settles for 3. 7-6 Ohio.

Miami settled for 3 as well and trail 10-3, but they stop Michigan and will have about 2 minutes to work. Threet got his ass pulled, apparently, but I didn’t see who the QB was on that drive. RichRod must be getting nervous. EDIT - It is Nick Sheridan, who played in the Utah game, too. Shows what I know.

Miami crosses midfield with :45 seconds. Miami can’t pass block for shit but Raudabaugh is finding his groove. That is, until they run a QB draw. I use the term “run” liberally. They fail to do anything and Michigan kneels to halftime. 10-3 Michigan.

OSU holds Ohio and gets great field position on a bad punt. Inside Ohio territory with plenty of time. Boeoechman gets sacked on 3rd and 5. Anything longer than a 5 yard pass and he looks totally out of sync. 4th and 8 with a minute left. This will probably mean halftime here, too. 7-6 Ohio.

The Michigan game is back, mercifully putting an end to ESPN’s awful halftime coverage. Andre Ware and ESPN2 are a sweet, sweet nectar by comparison. Threet comes out to start the second half and Michigan quickly finds themselves in a 3rd and long. They cannot do anything. Threet overthrows an 80 yard TD. Wide open. RichRod still has Pryor’s phone number on speed dial.

Raudabaugh makes an NFL throw or gets NFL lucky and threads a needle to Jamaal Roberts for a big gain. That was either an INT or a big play and the coin flipped for Miami. Makes you wonder why Miami can keep churning out good QBs and A&M can’t find one to save their lives.

Michigan sends 8 on third and 2 for some reason and Miami gets an easy convertion. I didn’t even realize people still blitzed like that. I haven’t seen it since the late 90s Cowboys were getting torched doing it. Miami is committing to the run. They are going to the endzone here soon.

I am known for my instant judgments before an adequate sample size is reached, but if there is a Big 10 team in the MNC game this year I am going to hunt down every board member against a playoff and keep them in a hole, Buffalo Bill style.

The refs just made a horrible call and robbed Miami of a first down, calling a pitch a forward pass and whistling the play dead. Horrible. Then the RB gets pulled down by his hair. Miami must be pissed. They have to go for it.

Deciding escapability inadequate for his needs, whoever is with Pam Ward decided to describe Boo Jackson’s great “elusivity.” I love you, 11am crews. Ohio is back in OSU territory thanks to a running QB. My spellcheck won’t recognize either, but I’m think I should add them and declare elusivity the official Barking Carnival Word.

Merriweather gets the first for Miami and the drive is saved. An ‘inadvertent whistle’ was ruled and Miami essentially got a do-over. Don’t think I’ve ever seen that before.

Beautiful throw and beautiful defense to save a TD for Michigan. That looked like a TD on a fade from the slot. The CB was beat but recovered nicely by knocking the ball away. Textbook. 10-6 Michigan.

Uh oh . . . snap over the head of Becocockman leads to an Ohio TD. Holy shit.

Holy shit. 14-6. Boos are raining down like couch flame embers.

Sam MehGuffie might be the best skill player on the team right now. That is a good thing if you are Michigan Tech. He is doing a good job dodging the first hit, at least. He could be really good in the RichRod offense on the perimeter.

OSU finally puts something together, mixing runs and curls to score in the most unexciting way possible. They choose not to go for two and the football gods reward them with a missed XP. 14-12 Ohio.

Ohio turns away from everything that’s been working — that is, the one thing that’s been working — and goes straight to the quick passes. Neither is close. Ohio punts.

Miami is getting it’s running game going. If they can score here and put more pressure on UM’s offense, this could get ugly for the maize and blue.

Ohio has to punt . . . but the Ohio returner muffs the kick and ends the game for Ohio. Whoops.

Meanwhile Virginia Tech and Furman are scoreless halfway into the 2nd quarter.

Miami is starting to grind this out. Don’t underestimate the run game, even if it’s not working early on. Everybody needs it at some point. Even you, Mike.

Oh boy, Raudabaugh overthrew another sure long TD. Miami has left at least 14 and maybe 21 points on the board with bad throws. Miami gives up a sack two a three man rush and they might’ve just fingernailed their best chance at this game. That’s the difference between winning and losing.

Michigan gets a . . . friendly late hit call and had the ball at midfield. They need points here in the worst way.

The get MehGuffie on the perimeter and he shows his speed. His career with Carr would’ve been really short, but he can actually do things with Rodriguez. They score the next play and both of these games are effectively over. Voters, however, will not be kind.