Kree-Gah! I kill!
I think most of us know that the problem with A&M's offense last year was its damnable complexity. They utilized an assortment of formations and plays so confoundingly intricate that Neils Bohr, much less a Land And Ranch Management major, could never hope to master it.
Mike Sherman is doing something about it:
"We’ve tried to limit our terminology from what it was last year," Aggies coach Mike Sherman said following practice. "The West Coast offense has a lot of verbiage, and so we’re trying to take things down to one word — almost one-syllable words — as much as possible."
He's teaching them a combination of Klingon and Tarzan's ape language.
Jerrod Johnson - Mig Yar Ap Nok zulu! Foo-baw. Booley. Ik Waa Taa Naptham Wantaaa! Et tu brute? Ekwa Sher-man U - bjork dipthong wonton lulu ewok!
(Jerrod Johnson - when you throw an interception, I wish to tear the flesh from your throat with my incisors. I am Sher-man. I am clan leader. Do you defy me? I have sharp teeth! And the penis of a cave bear!)
More on Aggie baby talk:
Sherman, a former A&M assistant who coached in the NFL for a decade before returning to Aggieland a year ago, said the coaches can still get their point across by using simpler words.
A&M will now use words like 'sad' instead of "soul crushing despair"; 'extra-poopy' instead of "impossibly horrendous"; 'double sad foo-baw' instead of "shockingly bleak football program", and Mike Sher-man instead of "Bill Callahan."
Aggie audible package
(h/t to our friend Milkman Dan for bringing to my attention)