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Mike Sherman To Offense: Kree Gah Ya Gaa!

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Kree-Gah! I kill!

I think most of us know that the problem with A&M's offense last year was its damnable complexity. They utilized an assortment of formations and plays so confoundingly intricate that Neils Bohr, much less a Land And Ranch Management major, could never hope to master it.

Mike Sherman is doing something about it:

"We’ve tried to limit our terminology from what it was last year," Aggies coach Mike Sherman said following practice. "The West Coast offense has a lot of verbiage, and so we’re trying to take things down to one word — almost one-syllable words — as much as possible."

He's teaching them a combination of Klingon and Tarzan's ape language.

Example:

Jerrod Johnson - Mig Yar Ap Nok zulu! Foo-baw. Booley. Ik Waa Taa Naptham Wantaaa! Et tu brute? Ekwa Sher-man U - bjork dipthong wonton lulu ewok!

(Jerrod Johnson - when you throw an interception, I wish to tear the flesh from your throat with my incisors. I am Sher-man. I am clan leader. Do you defy me? I have sharp teeth! And the penis of a cave bear!)

More on Aggie baby talk:

Sherman, a former A&M assistant who coached in the NFL for a decade before returning to Aggieland a year ago, said the coaches can still get their point across by using simpler words.

A&M will now use words like 'sad' instead of "soul crushing despair"; 'extra-poopy' instead of "impossibly horrendous"; 'double sad foo-baw' instead of "shockingly bleak football program", and Mike Sher-man instead of "Bill Callahan."


Aggie audible package

(h/t to our friend Milkman Dan for bringing to my attention)