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CFN Predicts Big 12 - Texas 3rd In South

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College Football News, bringers of the "Reggie McNeal is much better than Vince Young" amusement, proves that a thousand monkeys placed in front of a thousand keyboards is an attainable dream. If you've ever wondered what it would be like to give a site to the guys who lead stadium cheers and demand to name the defense on your team's bulletin board, read on.

CFN Prediction: 9-3

9/5 UL Monroe W
9/12 at Wyoming W
9/19 Texas Tech W
9/26 UTEP W
10/10 Colorado W
10/17 Oklahoma (in Dallas) L
10/24 at Missouri L
10/31 at Oklahoma State L

11/7 UCF W
11/14 at Baylor W
11/21 Kansas W
11/26 at Texas A&M W

They predict that Texas will drop three games in succession: OU, @ Mizzou, @ OSU. Yielding a 3rd place finish in the Big 12 South. We're Alamo Bowl bound! Interesting. I'm not a particularly reactionary fan and for me, the why is as important as the what. Maybe writer Pete Fiutak has some real insight - something that I'm missing.

So what's CFN's rationale for a disappointing year?

The possibility of a disappointing year! And pressure!

Team That Will Disappoint: Texas. Considering this is a national title-or-bust year after all the issues of last season, the potential is there for there to be a major letdown if things don't go perfectly.

Finicky Texas need things just so. We're a bridezilla, mascara pouring down our face in a contorted hate mask because someone farted at the rehearsal dinner during the groom's toast.

I bet Colt quits at halftime of the UTEP game if the X-Box jack in his locker doesn't work. And you don't want to see what Sergio Kindle will do if we forget to cut the crust off of his sandwich.

Oklahoma is better

No, Oklahoma is different.

Oklahoma State has the firepower and maturity to pull off a win over the Longhorns

Is Gundy growing a moustache? That should make a difference. We're 11-0 against OSU under Brown while averaging 39.5 ppg. In that time, OSU has put up 24, 35, 28, 35, 34 points respectively and lost each contest. We've identified a classic OSU firepower problem, people.

and going to Missouri could be a beartrap if the Red River Rivalry doesn't go well

Missouri is a bear trap! What's that trap baited with? A skin-of-their-teeth Northwestern bowl win and a packet of skittles? Texas has never lost the game after OU under Brown.

Oh sure, Texas will blow away at least seven teams on the slate, but when anything less than winning a Big 12 title and ending up in Pasadena in early January will be accepted, the pressure will be immense.

If there's a Johnny-come-lately program likely to fold under a Brave New World of expectation, it's Texas. I wish we were a beartrap.

Please consider that Texas will drop three consecutive games against a weak schedule, play in a minor bowl, and finish 3rd in the Big 12 South - likely the fourth or fifth best team in the Big 12 overall.

So where will we finish nationally?

According to CFN: Fourth.

4. Texas - Why Texas should be No. 1: All the same positives of last year are the same plusses as this year, only better.

Like 2008 Longhorn, but 30% more loss absorbent!

QB Colt McCoy should be even sharper

Unless things don't go perfectly. Who is responsible for the green jellybeans in Colt's dressing room spread? Now he'll sulk through the whole Colorado game.

the special teams will be the positive different in at least one game

The positive different. Awesome band name.

And then there's the motivation factor. After what happened last year, there's unfinished business to be taken care of.

This is a highly motived, angry football team with a chip on its shoulder. That can't wait to fold like Warren Moon hanging bath towels.

How can this dissonance be explained? I am not learned enough to deduce. Reveal your seductive truths, CFN Oracle!

There's one very important distinction in the CFN preseason rankings: these are based on how good the teams are going into the season and NOT how they're going to finish.

Oh, this is a power poll then. I get it.

No, wait. I don't.

Texas is the 4th best team in college football, but will lose all three of its games against CFN's ranked teams against a schedule most would describe as Pete Fiutakian in its quality.

Other points of interest:

- They rank Colorado as the best secondary in the Big 12. Texas 4th.

- Baylor is predicted to go 1-7 in the Big 12. 4-8 overall. Baylor goes to a bowl.

- They predict that the Big 12 North will operate at near parity to the Big 12 South going 8-10 in interdivisional games. This exhibits an understanding of power relationships comparable to Argentina in the Falklands circa 1982.

- Missouri will go 7-1 in the Big 12. If the Big 12 North winner has a record better than 5-3, I'll be shocked. And it's not going to be Missouri in any event.

Good times.

And CFN's prediction for Texas last year? 8-4.