Amidst all the cries of woe and calls for change, I would like to remind the fan base that Greg Davis is going to be the offensive coordinator for as long as Mack Brown is the head coach. Please cease and desist all forum, blog, and message board posts calling for his job.
I bring to the table the following conformations.
After the UCLA, game while trying to drown my sorrows in unconscionable volumes of well bourbon whiskey and the narrow minded babble of vapid sluts, I ran into a pair of particularly well informed former UT defensive backs that had parallel short term goals (booze, cooze, killing the brain cells). While our conversations ranged from the offerings of The Dogwood towards those goals to all subjects of University of Texas football and Texas high school football from days of yore, the inevitable question came up.
Paraphrasing due to my alcohol besotted brain:
TG: Do I have any hope that Greg Davis will be fired?
DB#1: None at all. Coach Davis was in Mack's wedding. He is his best friend. Mack really is all about family. There is no possible way that Greg Davis leaves the employ of the University of Texas before Mack Brown.
DB#2: No fucking way, man. We just have to wait for another VY or Colt.
By the way numero uno, these two former DB's (channeling James Lipton here) were a DELIGHT!!!
By the way numero dos, when former a University of Texas football player is sitting at a table spitting game at a bonnie young lass, there is a sort of etiquette involved if you want to talk to him. Improper behavior would be to pull up a chair in between the couple and cock block the ever loving shit out of the dude. Ricky Roma couldn't close with your mouth breathing ass between him and the mark. Be a team player douchebag. Here ends the lesson.
I possess a source deep within the Mack Brown compound. This guy is deeper than . . .uhh, Deep Throat and shit. I only access said source through an intermediary named Shogun, and then only obliquely as possible. We do not talk about the source. I don't even look him in the eye at social events. I won't even give him a code name. You are just going to have to trust me on this one.
Paraphrasing cause I never actually talk to the guy about the Horns:
Source: Greg Davis is part of the family. You might as well expect Mack to fire Sally. It would be against everything that Mack is about.
So, all Greg Davis will get fired vagina rubbing should stop immediately. The General has spoken. Or at least The General's unnamed sources have spoken.