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Flunking Bracketology

Kentucky, Connecticut, VCU, and Butler. What are the chances that anyone would have correctly predicted that odd quartet to qualify as the Final Four in this year's NCAA Tournament? According to one data set, roughly 0.000033%.

Not a lot of us got this one right. Out of approximately 6 million participants in the ESPN bracket contest, only two accurately predicted this year's Final Four. To understand how pathetic that is, consider the following. If 6 million orangutans randomly hurled feces at 6 million brackets, about 90 of the stochastic scat patterns would accurately reflect the results of this weekend's regional finals.

That's not just mathematical mumbo-jumbo, either. Acquire a few million apes and verify it for yourself. We've run the tests, and I'll be damned if 90 of those hairy knuckle-draggers didn't completely nail this fucker. Now one of them is going to be spending my $20.

Nice job with the Kansas-Ohio State final pick, chump.