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#12 Southern Cal at #5 Oregon

USC coach Pete Carroll says Oregon's offense is "the best offense we've seen probably since we've been here." Really, Pete? How soon we forget. But Oregon's offense is outstanding.

Oregon ran the spread with current LSU offensive coordinator Gary Crowton last year, but it was pass heavy. New OC Chip Kelly has a poster of Rich Rodriguez over his bed so he wants to run first out of the spread.

That shit is working. Quarterback Dennis Dixon is a legit Heisman candidate. Dixon finished last season with more interceptions than touchdowns, but this year he has 16 tds with only 3 ints. And Oregon is averaging almost 300 yards per game rushing. Junior Jonathan Stewart is averaging over 7 yards per carry, and he's a future NFLer.

Their defense, as usual, is middle of the road. It's hard to play defense when you're dressed like a faggot.

Oregon's ambiguously gay uniforms

This is the first time USC has been an underdog to a conference opponent since Nov 11, 2001. Fire Pete Carroll.

And why are the Trojans an underdog? Injuries.

The key for USC is to get some points. Mark Sanchez will get the start at quarterback. He struggled against Arizona in his first start and then looked great against Notre Dame. He doesn't use a towel to keep his hands dry, prefering instead to wipe them on the upper lip of his center. They need to take pressure off him by running the football. Their patchwork offensive line might be as healthy as it's been in weeks, and they still have like 8 tailbacks.

USC's defense is great. Getting linebacker Brian Cushing back from breast reduction surgery was important. MLB Ray Maualuga missed the Notre Dame game with injury, but he punched his doctor in the face so he'd release him to play this week.

'Now offenses will respect me for my mind.'

So how did USC fare in that Nov 11, 2001 game? They shut out UCLA 27-0.

Don't expect a shutout tomorrow.