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At one point during my daughter’s wedding reception last Saturday night, one of my very good friends, who also happens to be an Aggie who played on the Gene Stallings/Edd Hargett 1966-67 teams, accused me of inviting him to a wedding that turned out instead to be a Longhorn pep rally.
He had reason to level that accusation.
There are no televisions at the Winfield Inn in Kyle, Texas, where the wedding was held. I dared not carry my Walkman in the pocket of my tuxedo for fear of incurring the wrath of the lovely wifey. Believe me, the wrath of the wifey is something to be feared, and those ear buds stand out like a sore thumb.
But I never go anywhere without my Blackberry. Everyone knows that, and nobody, not even the wifey, argues with that. And thanks to the miracle of the wireless 3G network, and ESPN.com, I was able to keep up with much of the play-by-play of the Longhorns’ game with Texas Tech as the night’s festivities went on. Each time the Longhorns scored, which was not quite as frequently as any of us would have preferred, I had the DJ announce the score and play Texas Fight.
The wifey wasn’t thrilled, but eventually was ok with it, since the new son-in-law is a grad of the McCombs School of Bidness, and the daughter is a lifelong Longhorn fan.
The blushing bride and groom.
A good time was had by all, except for my Aggie buddy, my Aggie relatives, and my parents-in-law and the son-in-law’s parents, who are Texas Tech grads. Oh, well, you can’t please everyone, right?
Right.
Which brings me to Colt McCoy. He can’t seem to please everyone, either, try though he might. To read the various bulletin boards that populate the Longhorn internets last Sunday, one would have thought that Colt had raped the horses, killed the women and pruned the hedges of many small villages against Tech. Yet, to read his stat line, a rational person might have concluded that he’d had a pretty damn good football game, completing 70% of his passes for 205 yards against the first legitimate opponent the Longhorns had faced this season.
Who the hell are you????
But no. Angst over the decline of Colt McCoy ran rampant along all the Longhorn internets all week long, leading to the inevitable conclusion that many, many Longhorn fans just do not have enough to worry about in their daily lives.
After all, most observers around the country viewed a 34-24 win over Texas Tech as a good step forward for this Texas team in its run for a national championship. To many Texas fans, though, it was little more than a cause for unending worry.
All of which made me kind of glad I was hosting a wedding. After all, while 101,000 Texas fans in Austin and millions more watching on television were pulling their hair out, I was dancing the night away and drinking good wine with families and friends.
Ok, well, I wouldn’t have minded being at the game, pulling my hair out with the rest of you, but life does have its obligations, you know?
Let’s go to the Good, Bad and Ugly..
Ugly – Fox Sports coverage. As always happens when Texas follows an earlier game on FSN, the first game ended late. By the time the Kansas/So. Miss game was over, Texas had recovered UTEP’s first possession fumble. Then FSN takes a freaking FIVE MINUTE commercial break (I knew it was coming, so I timed it), involving more than 10 different commercials, spanning the Longhorns’ first TD, the 3 minute break before the ensuing kickoff, and all the way up to UTEP’s third down play on its next possession. This drives me crazy. F FSN and the horse they rode in on.
Ugly – Colt McCoy’s telegraphed pick 6 INT. Looked like a right-handed Chris Simms on that one, Colt.
Good – Defensive start to the game, with a fumble caused/recovered, followed by a 3 and out. This D has really improved its ability to force turnovers in Muschamp’s second season in Austin. UTEP total offense in 1st Quarter – 15 plays, MINUS 7 yards. Nice.
Good – DJ Monroe/Marquise Goodwin on KO returns. No one else in the country can put that kind of speed out on the field to return kicks. Our radio guys praised the blocking on that TD return by Monroe, but on replay, it looked like the UTEP guys simply failed to hold their lanes, and DJ just cut it back behind them and ran past the kicker.
Good and Bad – kickoffs. It’s good when the coaches have Tucker boom it through the endzone. It’s bad when they have him try to kick it to the goal line and let our guys try to cover. Please, coaches, let him kick the damn ball through the endzone and quit trying to cover kickoffs. It is the weakest part of this team.
Good – Safeties catching the ball. How about that? 3 INTs from Gideon and Thomas. Add in another from Ben Wells. Good stuff. Somebody must’ve brought a tube of Stick ‘em to the game.
Good - Megan Fox hosting Saturday Night Live.
Gratuitous pic of Megan Fox.
Good – Colt’s first TD strike to Buckner. Tremendous pass protection by the line, and Colt throws a rope to Bucker running a deep crossing route.
Bad – the “Wild Horn”. The worst thing that ever happened to this team was Chiles’s 34 yard gain out of this glorified Q package against Tech last week. Now, Davis thinks it might actually work and wants to run it more often. It’s worthless, Greg. Seriously, do you really think you’re fooling the opposing defense by lining a WR up at QB and running the exact same plays you run when Colt is back there? And do you really think it’s somehow to our advantage to effective play 10 against their 11, given that the opposing D doesn’t have to worry at all about covering Colt? Cut it out. Seriously.
Good – Colt to Shipley. That 16 play, 88 yard 2nd quarter drive was a thing of beauty. As nearly as I could count, Ship had 77 yards on 5 catches on that drive alone. Pretty decent.
Good – Colt’s first half. 24 of 30 for 261 yards, 3 Tds. That’s 80%, and that was with 3 outright drops. Can we drop all the drama about his not being the “old” Colt now? Thanks.
Bad – “working on the running game” to start the 2nd half, and getting squat out of it, until Colt dropped back into the shotgun. We cannot run the ball against anyone with the QB under center. Not against anyone. Period.
Ugly – the Texas “rushing” game. Oh, the final stats look just peachy – 42 attempts for a princely 304 yards, right? But go check out the play by play - our first 15 runs netted 58 yards through late in the 2nd quarter. The first 14 runs netted 35 yards, then Vondrell picked up 23 on the 15th run play for a TD to make the score 40-7. 19 of those 35 yards were gained by Colt McCoy on 2 runs. That means that our RBs had 16 yards on their first 12 attempts in this game. We racked up huge yards in the 2nd half against their scrubs and exhausted starters, like we always do. We did jackshit on the ground for the first half and first drive of the 2nd half. And that was against the very worst defense we are going to see all season. Our running game continues to be a running joke. Period. End of discussion.
Bad – Ole Miss. Coming into the season, I thought Ole Miss was the single most overrated team in the country, followed closely by Notre Dame and Georgia. Thus far, the Rebs have done nothing to disabuse me of that notion.

Sometimes you feel like a Nutt, sometime you don’t.
Good – Oregon 42, Cal 3. Another one bites the dust.
Good – Iowa beats Penn State. We now have three legit undefeated teams left standing: Texas, Florida, and Alabama. Florida and Alabama either lose in the regular season or play each other eventually. If we win out, we are in the national championship game in the Rose Bowl.

Not a good day to be Jo Pa.
Good – defensive line play. Thoroughly dominating from start to finish. So good that the LBs hardly show up in the stat line, with the notable exception of Emmanuel Acho, who continues to make play after play. It says a lot about this program that we can bring a Sr. Eddie Jones into games as our fourth DE. A lot.
Special Teams Player of the Game – Jordan Shipley and DJ Monroe. Our return teams were extraordinary in this one.
Defensive Player of the Game – Everybody. Seriously, when you give up 53 total yards, how are you supposed to single anyone out? Just an amazing team effort.
Offensive Player of the Game – The candidates are Colt, Shipley and Buckner. I’d have to go with Colt, although Shipley’s performance on that 88 yard drive was almost enough to throw it to him.
So the pre-season schedule has come to an end, and the Longhorns are exactly where they need to be: Undefeated and ranked #2 in the land. The team heads into the off-week with some minor dings, all of which can apparently be overcome in the two weeks leading into the game with Colorado.
This version of the Longhorns sports the best defense we have seen on the 40 acres in a long time. The secondary is dominant, the LBs are solid, and the DL is really outstanding. Most pleasant surprise: Ben Alexander. This guy has really been very good in stuffing things up in the middle, which I think everyone had feared would be something of a weakness for this defense. But there has been nothing going on for offenses in the middle of this Texas defense, even with Norton going down with a shoulder injury.
Offensively, the emergence of Dan Buckner has been a dramatic addition. Colt hasn’t quite been as overwhelming as the Colt of 2008, but has been a pretty strong imitation. The WR crew has been very good, but could really have used Brandon Collins. The OL remains the weak spot on this side of the ball, but showed signs of improvement, at least in pass protection, against UTEP. Then again, it’s hard to content that UTEP provides much of a barometer here. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens in Dallas to know for sure. Run blocking remains abysmal until the other side has been worn out by the heat.
Abysmal was the nicest word I could think of to use in that last sentence.
What is really fun is that the special teams are really special, kickoff coverage standing as the lone exception. The cure for that is no mystery, and thanks to Tucker’s leg, easy to correct. It just requires a coaching decision to quit getting cute.
Along about the middle of the 2nd quarter of this game, my son asked me what I thought the Longhorns’ chances were of making the national championship game.
My reply: Better than anyone else’s.
And that’s a true story.
Hook ‘em!!!
bigdukesix said:
September 26th, 2009 at 11:44 pm
Nice writeup.
It says a lot about this program that we can bring a Sr. Eddie Jones into games as our fourth DE.
Maybe next year. He’s a JR this year.
bigdukesix said:
September 26th, 2009 at 11:58 pm
Bad:
Garrett Gilbert’s usage through the first third of the regular season.
He has 14 pass attempts so far this season through 4 games, putting him on pace for 42. But it’s unlikely that 3/4 of our remaining games will be blowouts, as 3 of our first 4 games have been. And it seems equally unlikely that Gilbert will feature in close games. Hence, Gilbert will have less opportunities to see the field from here on out. Which means that at his current pace, Gilbert will probably finish with thirty-something pass attempts this season.
I know it’s nitpicking to whine about backup QB usage on the #2 team in the country, but I think there’s something to be gained by letting Gilbert pass the ball when he comes into the game, something more tangible than “good sportsmanship”.
Or am I being unrealistic here to complain about this?
Cricketslayer said:
September 27th, 2009 at 12:07 am
Congratulations to your daughter. Thank you for the Megan Fox pic. And for the love of God, we’ve got to do something about the “Wild Horn.” I’ve come to detest seeing John Chiles on the field at all, knowing it’s only a matter of time before we telegraph a play to the opposing defense using him. We’re going to throw away three or four plays using that damn formation against Oklahoma, and as we know, three or four plays can often be the difference between winning or losing in that game.
It’s giving me flashbacks to the Brett Robin shuttle pass, and I thought I had effectively forgotten them.
texoz said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:16 am
Great post, as usual. Congrats on the wedding, too.
Is that an al Qaeda flower bomb that someone is handing them?
texoz said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:19 am
Meant to add a comment about the “Wild Horn” package. If it’s really going to be effective they need to throw the ball out of it. More than once. And at least once to Colt on a route that’s not over the middle. Alas, we’re not that clever. I’d rather show teams this to respect all options from that formation.
EyesOfTX said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:29 am
Big duke - it’s not unreasonable at all. It actually could become a critical element to this year’s success should Colt miss some time with injury. We just have to hope that doesn’t happen. Although, I must say that I have been extremely pleased with how Gilbert has looked the few times he has gotten into the game.
nbmisha said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:34 am
Great to see you back in action, and congratulation on your daughter’s wedding.
Ugly: Tech vs UH. Bastards made us look bad. 7 second half points, after I went to bed,
maninblack said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:36 am
What’s amazing is that with as much speed as Monroe has Goodwin was right on his heels going into the end zone and appeared to be at a jog. That’s a lot of speed between those two and I credit the coaching staff with finally putting them back there together.
hopefulhorn said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:40 am
Welcome back, Eyes, and thanks for the update and nice pic from your daughter’s wedding. Such is this little Internets community that I actually had a brief thought about your event while at the Tech game, hoping things were going smoothly with everyone hitting their marks. No hair-pulling here-not enough of it left for that.
Good summary, as usual. Agree that this defense is as good as any we have put on the field in some time. Good to see some DB’s actually catch the ball yesterday. Great to have this defense throttling opponents while we wait for GD to stumble on ways to get the ball to our numerous play-makers.
Running game does continue to be a joke. Missed yesterday’s game for our youngest’s 8th birthday party. Watched a tape of the first half last night with my Sooner father-in-law trying to explain how Davis negates our size and speed advantages with our dreaded East-West running attack.
Our main hope in Dallas is that our DL will be a bigger mismatch over OU’s problematic OL than the Sooners’ excellent defensive front against our OL. We should also have a big special teams edge.
maninblack said:
September 27th, 2009 at 7:28 am
Good – Colt to Shipley. That 16 play, 88 yard 2nd quarter drive was a thing of beauty. As nearly as I could count, Ship had 77 yards on 5 catches on that drive alone. Pretty decent.
The one thing that was bad about that drive is it took two 4th down conversions against that terrible defense to make it happen. If that is OU we punt.
Congrats on the wedding
Poor Aggies said:
September 27th, 2009 at 7:48 am
hopefulhorn - you can look forward to seeing Davis run us North-South when we play in Stillwater
Dutchie said:
September 27th, 2009 at 9:06 am
Did i miss something fairly obvious….where the hell was Okafor during the scrub time? Was he out injured?
Bob in Houston said:
September 27th, 2009 at 9:32 am
“Then FSN takes a freaking FIVE MINUTE commercial break (I knew it was coming, so I timed it)…”
I too warned my wife it was coming. She was mollified by the touchdown having been scored.
She also asked why they let Chiles take snaps. I said, “Because everyone else does it.” Then she asked if it was a good idea. I said, “Probably not.”
One thing my wife has, which we have discussed many times over the years, is Adequate Sports Knowledge. It’s a good thing for a wife to have, I have determined.
hobzzz said:
September 27th, 2009 at 9:34 am
eyes, while it’s nice to see the GBU back on sunday, there’s no excuse for you taking last weekend off. your daughter was the one who got married……
admit it, you were too drunk to type….
jinx said:
September 27th, 2009 at 9:38 am
Bad - Coverage form Fox. We were told that Sergio was out with a shoulder injury and never heard anything further. Any body hear anything?
The second half introduction of the I-formation was laughable. Why did we line up in a formation that we will never use in a meaningful game to work on our running game. This seemed like a game to really work on our running game and we didn’t even attempt to while it was still a game.
I thought not playing Gilbert more was a mistake too. It was cute to play the walk on scrubs at the end of the game, but what benefit does the team get from that?
So I’m not just ranting about a complete blowout - Our defense was straight salt. The UTEP players were tired of taking the field on offense in the second half. That is a testament to the hell that was raised on that side of the ball. Too bad the gimme interception for 7 ruined their shutout.
WWGDD said:
September 27th, 2009 at 10:27 am
Kindle’s status?
Wildhorn…a joke and wasted downs. Don’t tell me Davis is saving throwing out of it until OU. Annoying.
kafka said:
September 27th, 2009 at 10:41 am
I don’t know what conclusions one can draw from a blowout but here goes anyway.
Re: Colt’s performance vs. Tech, the most common comment I saw was that the Tech QB outplayed Colt,. True enough and especially surprising since the Tech QB was a rookie starting his first road game while Colt is a Heisman candidate.
Sucks to be the starting TB this year. Some of the running backs looked pretty good to me. Great to see Fozzy play (and he looked good). Vondrell looks really quick now that he is healthy again. It is true that the UT running game does not work well until the 2nd half (presumably because the other team is tired) and that UT is a pass first team. UT is probably going to have pass 80% of the time in the 1st half against OU. One area where the horns could improve a bunch is on dump passes to the TBs. The horns are also getting virtually nothing from short passes to TEs. Even 5 yard completions would be really helpful to moving the chains. The good news is that the horns’ running game should be at its most effective when trying to protect a lead late in the game.
Wild horn did suck but the big picture is that it protects Colt’s health while still getting the QB involved in the running game. Florida won an MNC with this approach Tebow’s first year. The running QB substitution is getting more popular, not less. The idea is sound, the UT execution not so sound. As you pointed out the UT running game sucks so this is an attempt to boost it for those occasions when you really need to be able to run. Yeah, you can run Colt at least as effectively (probably more effectively) than you can run Chiles but you risk hurting Colt. If Colt gets injured, bye bye MNC. These blowout games are where you experiment with the offense to see how you can improve it.
UT pass blocking was fine against Tech. There was very little pressure on Colt.
texoz said:
September 27th, 2009 at 11:33 am
“Wildhorn…a joke and wasted downs. Don’t tell me Davis is saving throwing out of it until OU. Annoying.”
If that does happen, it better work or Davis will have a dinosaur egg on his face.
russwm said:
September 27th, 2009 at 11:48 am
For now I do not mind not sending the kickoffs out of the endzone, because our kickoff team needs as much work as they can get. Once we start playing the OSU’s and OU’s of the world, however, I share your desire to see the ball landing in the back of the endzone.
ransomstoddard said:
September 27th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Good: overall team speed, Shipley, the defense
Bad: Austin heat and whoever thought it was a good idea to have a 2:30pm September game [do people outside of Austin realize that the rest of the country is enjoying cool,crisp evenings and pleasant warm days-as opposed to stifling heat and humidity?]
Ugly: the wildhorn, kickoff coverage
Atrocious: UT’s running game. Anyone still want to annoit Newton as the next great rb? I have no idea whether its the scheme, or the lack of a true Division I rb, or what its such a miserable abomination. It was interesting to see our o-linemen consistently being stood up in the hole by UTEP’s linebackers——-let me say that again: by UTEP’s linebackers. Not OU’s or USC’s or anyone good. UTEP.
And for all those who spent last week chest-thumping about the win over Tech? I give you Houston 29, Tech 28. And that great Greg Davis offense managed 320 yards against Tech’s swiss cheese defense, Houston got 579.
Bottom line, this team still has not played anyone good, and perhaps not even a bowl team yet. Continue to play at this level and we will be spending December in Shreveport.
Sasha is a Longhorn Dog said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
Do yards matter as much as points? Texas still scored more than UH and allowed less. I’d say that negates any arguments about “yards.”
ransomstoddard said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
No, I agree, far more important to score points. And we scored 5 more than Houston and allowed 4 less. Impressive.
Bob in Houston said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Ransom in mid-season form. Shreveport? Really??
This team hasn’t played anybody, but it’s still putting up about 50 and allowing 15, with a considerable chunk of the 15 due to terrible field position because of turnovers.
I never assume an undefeated season, so I’m not expecting this team to go to the BCSCG, but do you really expect this team to go 7-5?
jinx said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
Does anyone else find it extremely disturbing that Colt has thrown 45 more passes (100 to 145) than do it at this point last year. That is a testament to our running problems as much as anything and kind of a self fulfilling process. We are bad at running the ball because we don’t attempt to and we don’t attempt to run because we are bad at it. This is the Achilles calve (much bigger than a heel) for this team. I put it squarely on Greg Davis’s shoulders.
On the “Wild Horn.” I don’t mind running it, but someone needs to tell Chiles that it is actually OK to hand the ball to the tailback. Monroe could have had big gains twice on that play and instead Chiles took the play into a mob. Unless we see some variety (asking a lot from Davis I know) the Wild Horn will be a waste just like the Q (which suffered from the same problems in my opinion).
jinx said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
omit “do it”…I really should proof read these things
blackscholes said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
Doubt we see Tim again, but would be entertained to see him lipstick that pig of a game.
TXinDC said:
September 27th, 2009 at 1:54 pm
Can one of the Barkers make a post that simply says, “SoS is irrelevant to this season”? Because the commentariat keeps making comments like the above about TTech, and it really doesn’t matter. If Texas loses one game, we’re 85% likely to not make it through to the championship game. Then debating strength of schedule will be even more of a waste of time and energy.
Anyway, my three complaints / areas to improve:
Colt was great - I’m nitpicking, but he needs to improve his read progressions as well as not staring down his receivers. After UTEP’s botched punt, Colt again looked down his receiver allowing the DB to get the jump, while his outlet receiver, Newton, was ready in the flat to burn into the end zone.
Again, in the middle of the 3rd, Colt looked down Kirkendoll instead of doing his reads, where he would’ve seen a wide-open Chiles in the end zone.
This will become important against some more challenging opponents.
One LEGITIMATE concern I have for Colt in the future:
Texas’s first series in the 2nd qtr, the refs blew the ball dead before the snap but not before some of the antsy UTEP defenders made it into the backfield and had Colt surrounded. The problem was that Colt just STOOD there, assuming that the dead ball whistle was a sort of force field. Look, knowing nasty OU and other teams, he’s gotta get out of the way even if the whistles blow because someone’s going to intentionally late hit him into oblivion a la A&M.
I liked the bouncing ball kick-offs, but I agree that if we can kick them out of the endzone, let’s go that route instead.
EyesOfTX said:
September 27th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
“Can one of the Barkers make a post that simply says, “SoS is irrelevant to this season”? ”
I think I just did, didn’t I?
Hook ‘em!!!
lowery said:
September 27th, 2009 at 5:10 pm
Colt also “Rode off on the women.” That son of a bitch.
texasengr said:
September 27th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
By my rough calculations (okay, there were no calculations), the “Wild Horn” is getting us ~3 yds/play. This includes 1 rather significant gain, 1 false start penalty, lots of 1-2 yard gains and a handful of losses. Yeah, largely ineffective.
Chiles NEEDS to be on the field though because either he’s simply incredible at making people miss when he has even a tiny bit of space, or when he gets the ball, the remaining personnel do a fantastic job of blocking for him. Does anyone have YAC stats handy? I’d bet he leads the team in average YAC.
I do like that we have 4 quality running backs we can plug in to average 1 yard per carry and keep SOME heat off Colt.
…And c’mon guys. Houston isn’t making us look bad. The whole state of Oklahoma already did if anyone was going to. That’s a quality Houston team, it seems.
Is the sky still falling? What are we honestly hoping to see in the Colorado game? Give up on expecting us to have a quality 1st half running team — we don’t need it.
ransomstoddard said:
September 27th, 2009 at 5:32 pm
McCoy is locking on to Shipley on nearly every play. We have to hope we can win games this year with the 2007 McCoy.
flamingmonkeyass said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:09 pm
“McCoy is locking on to Shipley on nearly every play. We have to hope we can win games this year with the 2007 McCoy.”
Dan Buckner disagrees with this statement.
Seriously ransom either get a life, or a least a better attitude, or stop watching Texas play football. I worry about your health. I mean you’ve already got to be like a 100 or something based on the bitterness and ben gay smell coming from your comments. No reason to waste what little time you have left lamenting over how much suck. Especially after games in which we score more points than our opponents had YARDS.
BeatenDeadHorse said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:17 pm
My user name is an apt description of ransom’s rants.
whoopspat said:
September 27th, 2009 at 6:26 pm
I saw that Barnett got in the game late. Why would you put the freshman in total garbage time. Are we intentionally wasting him this season? I did hear he was out for the season so maybe he will get the redshift after all. I had also heard he was looking good in practice. Can anyone elaborate on his situation?
I mentioned this last week, too-E. Acho is punching for the ball a lot like DJ did. That’s refreshing to see.
The team was showing some serious support for each other after big plays. McCoy was all over McGee after his touchdown. The entire team was mobbing Wells after his INT. It’s great to see that team unity and support.
Looks like we’re looking into getting Goodwin the ball more in a Brandon Collins type rile. He’s had a tough time getting off the line on some of the screens but improved as the game went on. You could see McCoy coaching him up on the bench after one of the failed screens. I would look for him to have a breakout game soon.
Buckner had an awesome one handed grab for the TD.
Fozzy can move a pile. I noticed this last year, too. He seems too small to do this but once he gets going he is really good at keeping the momentum.
ecurbmanchild said:
September 27th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
Ransom, WTF? Damn boy, back up and take a breath!
Blueshorn said:
September 28th, 2009 at 8:44 am
Ugly: The east side stands in the second half, especially the student section. Perhaps now we can put to rest some of the whining from the younger crowd that the geezers on the west side leave early. Yeah, I know it was shady on the west side and I know the game sucked, but the students bailed on their team.
gohornsgo90 said:
September 28th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
Buckner’s catch reminded me of that Mike Williams catch a few years back for USC. Very eerily similar, but Buck’s was more difficult due to being adequately covered.